Category: Womens Health

Mental Health Experts Shine A Light On The Struggle Of Infertility Over The Festive Season by Experts at JAAQ

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Victoria Volkova Unsplash)

For many people, Christmas time/festive season is a time for happiness, family and bringing people together; however, one in seven UK couples face a hidden grief : infertility..

Research reveals that nearly three in four people battling infertility are burdened with feelings of failure, ​​adding to the hidden grief many already feel during the holidays. In response, mental health platform JAAQ wants to spread awareness around why infertility can be harder during the holidays and what we can do to approach the topic sensitively.

Male fertility coach explains why infertility feels heavier during the festive season 

Male fertility coach, Shaun Greenway, who was diagnosed with azoospermia, explains on JAAQ why the holiday season is so difficult: “We got a pregnancy announcement at Christmas, and it took me right back to that place. That hurt. That weird feeling of happiness mixed in with jealousy and anger and pain.”  Even after he had twins via donor sperm, the emotions didn’t disappear “It will always be part of me. It’s always there.”

Shaun’s experience highlights a truth many people face – that infertility doesn’t end with treatment or conception; it changes shape, often resurfacing during emotionally charged times like Christmas, a time filled with pregnancy announcements and marketing imagery filled with children and togetherness.

Founder and CEO of Fertility Help Hub, Eloise Edington, knows that pain well. Supporting her devastated husband while navigating her own grief, she recalls when speaking on JAAQ: “Supporting my devastated husband while also equally grieving myself and knowing that we would never have a biological child together meant we were both drowning in separate pain.”

She’s open about the reality of those moments: “Lots of crying, lots of eating chocolate, wine, being together. Not pretty. Not Pinterest-worthy. Just real.” For many couples facing infertility, this is the reality of Christmas – raw, difficult and far from the idealised celebrations we often imagine. 

(image: Priscilla Prisceez, Unsplash)

4 dos and don’ts for talking about infertility this holiday season

To make the festive season a little easier, mental health platform JAAQ has revealed four essential dos and don’ts for talking about infertility this Christmas – whether you’re facing it yourself, or want to approach the topic sensitively with others. 

Dos:

  • 1. Think before you ask sensitive questions about pregnancy or starting a family and wait for them to bring it up themselves naturally in conversation.
  • 2. Share with someone you trust – If you are struggling, consider speaking openly with someone, whether in person or by message, which can help you to process your emotions. For Shaun, he shared: “Once I did start opening up, that’s when everything got a bit lighter.” Elouise suggests, “Find community, find support, speak to other people who are going through similar struggles. How are they dealing with it? What are they doing to keep the romance alive or to get through this tricky time and enjoy life?”
  • 3. Encourage without imposing your opinion. If someone shares something personal, listen fully before responding. Let them know you are there for them and ask how you can support them, rather than assuming what they need. 
  • 4. Create a Christmas/ festive routine that works for you. If traditional celebrations feel overwhelming, permit yourself to do things differently. You might skip the big dinner, start a new ritual like a quiet morning walk with coffee, or find other ways to mark the day that feel manageable.  

Dont’s:

  • Don’t ask personal questions about pregnancy or family plans, especially in social settings
  • Don’t offer unsolicited advice like ‘just relax’ or ‘it’ll happen when it’s meant to’
  • Don’t probe with follow-up questions if someone opens up; listen supportively rather than asking questions that might cause unintentional distress
  • Don’t pressure someone to participate in every activity or ‘get into the spirit.’ Sometimes the kindest thing is simply allowing them to step away 

(image: Pereanu Sebastian: Unsplash)

About JAAQ

JAAQ – which stands for Just Ask A Question is a pioneering mental health platform designed to make credible, compassionate support accessible to everyone – especially in the workplace. The platform provides engaging, clinically backed content by connecting users with experts and individuals with lived experience, who answer mental health questions anonymously. This unique, interactive approach empowers people to explore their mental wellbeing in a safe, stigma-free environment.

Snuggle Season Has Arrived! Limited Edition ‘Stomp’ BedTime Wear With NEXT For LOROS Hospice. (Non Sponsored Post)

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Limited edition Stomp pyjamas by Next, featuring a playful elephant design. 100% of profits support LOROS Hospice’s care for patients and families.)

Now that clocks are going back and its time to get snuggled and cosy, the perfect pyjamas for yourself and little ones have arrived! Teaming up with retail giant NEXT, the LOROS Hospice in Leicester, UK, have come up with some beautiful, stomping elephant pyjamas filled with colourful designs. The designs are inspired by the hand-painted elephant sculptures as part of the famous ‘Stomp Around Leicester’ art trail, which culminated in an art auction.

LOROS Hospice is facing a £2 million shortfall in funding and so NEXT has joined forces with LOROS to encourage the fundraising momentum! 100% profits from the pyjamas go to LOROS., which provides free, high quality compassionate care to terminally ill patients.

Available online now at next.co.uk, with nationwide delivery – every pair sold contributes to LOROS’s vital, compassionate care for over 2,600 patients each year. 

There are matching PJ sets for women and children, for family fun! These cosy pyjamas offer more than just warmth and style – they offer a feel-good factor that comes from helping a community lifeline.

Snuggle up for a cause this autumn: by slipping into Stomp PJs, families can stay stylishly warm while making a real difference to LOROS Hospice when it needs it most.

Please note: This post is non-sponsored (no fee taken) so Be Ur Own Light Blog can get entirely behind this wonderful cause!

image: Limited edition Stomp pyjamas by Next, featuring a playful elephant design)

The women’s Stomp PJs are 100% cotton and available in sizes XS – 2XL in regular length, and S – 2XL in tall. The children’s Stomp PJs are also 100% cotton and available in sizes 9-12 months, through to 7-8 years.

Healing The Mind And Body Through Supportive Recovery Practices by Isla Salt

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Yannic Laderach, Unsplash)

Recovery from addiction is a deeply personal and often challenging journey. Each individual faces unique struggles, yet a common thread binds everyone together—the need for healing that nurtures both the body and the mind. Traditional treatments like medical detox and counselling are essential, but recovery extends beyond them. To truly sustain sobriety, many people benefit from incorporating supportive practices that promote physical wellness, emotional balance, and meaningful social connections.

Holistic recovery approaches focus on treating the whole person rather than just the symptoms of substance use disorder. This means addressing the emotional, mental, physical, and even spiritual aspects of health. Within this framework, two practices stand out for their effectiveness and accessibility: yoga as a healing tool and group therapy as a platform for connection and accountability. Together, these methods create a powerful balance, helping individuals not only manage cravings and triggers but also build resilience and long-term stability.

Understanding the Need for Holistic Healing

Addiction impacts far more than just the body. While substances can cause direct harm to organs and brain function, the cycle of dependency often disrupts emotional health and weakens relationships. Recovery programs that focus exclusively on physical detoxification may overlook the importance of mental clarity, emotional regulation, and social support—elements that are equally important in building a healthy life.

Supportive recovery practices go hand in hand with evidence-based therapies to address these needs. By combining structured treatments with holistic methods, people in recovery gain tools to manage stress, regulate emotions, and connect with others who understand their struggles. This integration often leads to improved outcomes and a reduced risk of relapse.

Yoga as a Pathway to Recovery

One of the most effective practices in holistic recovery is yoga for addiction recovery. Yoga provides more than just physical exercise; it is a discipline that strengthens the body, calms the mind, and fosters inner awareness. For people in recovery, yoga offers a constructive way to process emotions, cope with stress, and rebuild confidence.The benefits of yoga extend into multiple dimensions of healing:

  • Physical strength and resilience: Addiction often leaves the body weakened. Yoga helps restore energy, balance, and flexibility, giving individuals a sense of vitality.
  • Mental clarity: Breathwork and meditation in yoga reduce anxiety and improve focus, making it easier to navigate triggers and cravings.
  • Emotional regulation: Yoga encourages mindfulness, helping individuals respond to stress rather than react impulsively.
  • Spiritual connection: For many, yoga fosters a sense of purpose and inner peace, providing a meaningful counterbalance to past struggles.

Practicing yoga in recovery also creates structure and routine, both of which are essential for maintaining sobriety. Whether practiced individually or in a group setting, yoga can become a safe space to reconnect with oneself and rediscover a healthier way of living.

(image: Unsplash: Helena Lopes)

The Role of Community in Recovery

While practices like yoga are powerful for personal healing, recovery is not meant to be a solitary process. Addiction thrives in isolation, and overcoming it requires connection, support, and accountability. This is where community-based approaches such as group therapy play a vital role.

Human beings are social by nature, and support networks are key to emotional resilience. In group settings, individuals can share their stories, listen to others, and gain reassurance that they are not alone in their struggles. This shared experience often reduces shame and fosters empathy, which are critical for long-term healing.

Group Therapy as a Cornerstone of Support

Group therapy for substance abuse provides a safe and structured environment where individuals can open up about their experiences. Guided by a trained therapist, group sessions encourage honesty, accountability, and peer support. Unlike individual therapy, which focuses on one person’s journey, group therapy highlights the power of collective healing. Key benefits of group therapy include:

  • Shared understanding: Listening to others with similar struggles helps normalize feelings and experiences.
  • Accountability: Members often motivate each other to stay on track and celebrate progress.
  • Skill-building: Sessions may teach coping strategies, communication skills, and relapse prevention tools.
  • Hope and inspiration: Seeing others succeed in recovery can inspire confidence and determination.

Group therapy also helps individuals rebuild social skills that may have eroded during addiction. By practicing healthy communication and learning to trust again, participants strengthen the foundations of meaningful relationships outside the therapy room.

Balancing Individual and Collective Healing

The combination of yoga and group therapy illustrates how both individual and collective healing practices can work hand in hand. Yoga allows individuals to reconnect with themselves, build strength, and find calm in the face of challenges. Group therapy provides the encouragement and accountability that comes from shared experiences. Together, these practices address both the internal and external dimensions of recovery.

For many, the integration of body-focused and community-based approaches creates a balanced recovery journey. It ensures that healing is not only about overcoming physical dependence but also about cultivating emotional stability and social connection.

The Long-Term Impact of Supportive Practices

Recovery is not a short-term process—it is a lifelong commitment. Supportive practices like yoga and group therapy provide tools that individuals can carry with them long after formal treatment has ended. These practices foster resilience, helping individuals manage stress, cope with setbacks, and continue growing on their path to wellness.

Some people incorporate yoga as part of their daily routine, using it as a grounding practice. Others rely on ongoing group sessions or peer support communities to maintain accountability. The beauty of supportive recovery practices is their adaptability—they can evolve with a person’s needs and provide consistent strength throughout life.

Creating a Sustainable Recovery Lifestyle

The journey to sobriety is about much more than simply avoiding substances. It is about creating a lifestyle that supports health, purpose, and connection. A sustainable recovery lifestyle often includes:

  • Regular physical activity, such as yoga or other mindful exercises.
  • Participation in therapy or peer support groups.
  • Healthy nutrition and sleep habits.
  • Engagement in meaningful work, hobbies, or service.
  • Building strong, supportive relationships.

When individuals embrace both holistic and therapeutic practices, they are better equipped to live fulfilling lives beyond addiction.

Final Thoughts

Healing from addiction requires more than detoxification or medication—it requires a comprehensive approach that nurtures the mind, body, and spirit. Practices like yoga provide personal healing and inner balance, while group therapy fosters community, accountability, and shared growth. Together, they create a powerful foundation for lasting recovery.

By embracing supportive recovery practices, individuals not only overcome addiction but also rediscover the strength, resilience, and joy needed to build a healthier and more purposeful life.

This blog contains sponsored links.

Nutrition, Sleep And Mindset – The Answer to a Magnificent Menopause by Author Alison Bladh

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Alison Bladh/ Chocolate PR)

An award winning nutritionist and beauty therapist who’s helped hundreds of women globally to navigate menopause with wellness in mind is celebrating having climbed the Amazon book charts to become a No.1 Bestselling author, outperforming the likes of Davina McCall, Lisa Snowdon and Dr Louise Newson, with new Menopause manual –‘Have a Magnificent Menopause: A Straightforward Guide to Looking Good and Feeling Great’ 

Alison Bladh, 56, who is also a clinical supervisor for Nutritional Therapy at the University of West London, splits her time between the UK and Sweden was excited to see the book reach the top 30 bestselling books overall on Amazon Sweden across all genres including fiction and non-fiction, one of the only health titles to break the coveted Top 50, highlighting the demand for evidence-based, practical menopause support.

Offering women over 40 a no nonsense guide to thriving through perimenopause, menopause and beyond with or without Hormone Replacement Therapy, this straight-talking manual is already being praised as “a breath of fresh air in the menopause space”, and described as “like having a wise best friend, nutritionist and beauty therapist rolled into one.” 

Sharing practical guides, check lists and real women’s stories alongside clinical research and scientific studies, Alison’s mission is simple –  to help women over 40 take back control of their bodies, rediscover their energy, and feel confident and empowered in their skin again, after researching menopause became a passion of hers, having witnessed her mother suffer in silence  at a time when the topic was taboo. 

“Menopause, though more openly discussed in some countries today, is still stigmatised as something negative”, she said. “Growing up in a strict British household, I remember watching my mother and the women around her, all navigating perimenopause, suffering through what was then simply referred to as “The Change”. Nobody talked about it. It was shrouded in silences, misconceptions and misinformation.”

“While things are improving slowly in some parts of the world, this isn’t the case everywhere and there’s still a lot of work to be done. Women deserve knowledge, support and care during this natural stage of life. Menopause isn’t about fading into the background or becoming less relevant. It’s about stepping into a new kind of power, one where experience, wisdom and purpose shape the next chapter of our lives in ways that extend far beyond motherhood.”

The book tackles common challenges, everything from fatigue, brain fog and weight gain to confidence, skincare and mindset, helping women feel vibrant and in control at every stage of life. The tone is supportive and straight talking, cutting through confusing advice and adresses “menowashing” to deliver clear, evidence based solutions that work.

“Menopause is not something to ‘get through’ it is a wake up call to start putting yourself first” she says. “You deserve to feel in control, strong and beautiful and this starts with understanding your body and taking small yet powerful steps each day”.

“Have a Magnificent Menopause: A Straightforward Guide to Looking Good and Feeling Great”  will resonate with any woman who has ever stood in front of the mirror wondering where she went and is now ready to find her again”, she added.

(image: Alison Bladh/ Chocolate PR)

Here she shares 5 practical tips from the book to help women start feeling better today:

Alison’s Top Tips for ‘Thriving, Not Just Surviving’

1. Follow the 90/10 Rule
Healthy eating doesn’t have to mean restriction or perfection. The 90/10 rule is about nourishing your body with supportive foods 90% of the time  like protein, healthy fats, fibre, leafy greens and slow-release carbs  while still leaving room for 10% of the treats that make life enjoyable. Whether it’s a slice of cake with friends or a glass of wine on a special occasion, this balanced approach helps women stay consistent without guilt. It’s realistic, sustainable and removes the all-or-nothing mindset that often leads to frustration. Eating well should be empowering, not punishing.

2. Start the Day with Protein, Not Caffeine
Reaching for a coffee first thing in the morning might feel like second nature, but it can actually spike your cortisol and send your blood sugar on a rollercoaster. Instead, start your day with 20–30 grams of protein to support hormone balance, energy, focus and mood. A protein-rich breakfast  such as eggs, Greek yoghurt, tofu scramble or a protein smoothie helps stabilise your blood sugar, reduces mid-morning crashes, and keeps cravings at bay. This small shift can make a big difference to how you feel all day long.

3. Keep a Cooling Toolkit in Your Bag
Hot flushes and sudden temperature spikes can be distressing, especially in public. That’s why I always recommend keeping a “cooling toolkit” with you. This might include a peppermint facial mist, a mini hand fan, cooling wipes, or essential oil rollers (peppermint or lavender work well). Having something to soothe and cool you down helps you manage symptoms discreetly and confidently. It’s a small act of self-care that reinforces one important truth: you are not powerless, you are prepared.

4. Digital Declutter for Hormonal Health
Our devices might keep us connected, but they can also wreak havoc on our hormones. Constant notifications, social media scrolling and screen time raise cortisol levels, interfere with melatonin production and contribute to stress and poor sleep, all of which worsen menopausal symptoms. A daily digital break, even just 20–30 minutes, can calm the nervous system, ease anxiety, and support better emotional balance. Turn off the noise, step away from the screen, and reclaim some stillness. It’s one of the simplest ways to feel more grounded.

5. Swap Wine O’Clock for Magnesium Time
It’s tempting to unwind with a glass of wine at the end of a long day but alcohol can disrupt sleep, trigger hot flushes and make anxiety worse. Instead, create a relaxing evening ritual with magnesium. A warm magnesium-rich drink or a magnesium supplement can help soothe your nervous system, relax tense muscles and prepare your body for restful sleep. It’s a healthier wind-down option that supports hormonal balance and helps you wake up feeling restored instead of groggy. You’re still prioritising yourself just without the hormonal backlash.

For more tips see  https://www.alisonbladh.com/book

5 Daily Habits for Mental Clarity and Emotional Balance by Miranda Spears.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 2 Comments

(image: Roxana Zerni, Unsplash)

You need daily habits in your life for mental clarity; these daily habits are often vital for wellbeing. Sometimes your mental health might take a dip, you might feel drained, depressed or feeling like you are left behind and cannot keep up. Here are some daily habits that can help to boost your mental health:

Practice Morning Mindfulness

Mindfulness can include simple tasks such as starting off the day on a positive note and setting good intentions by writing or speaking affirmations or engaging in prayer. Every day after you get up, you should make your bed as this is a small exercise that will only take two minutes of your day and prepare for a good day. As soon as you get up, do some simple, mindful stretches like swinging your arms in circles or doing the cobra pose to prepare your body for a focused day quickly. 

Move Your Body

You should move your body and avoid sitting in one place, as moving around ensures that blood flows to your brain better and faster, providing it with oxygen, and activities like taking a stroll, especially early morning strolls when the weather is nice and there is calm in the air, are also good for you. You can breathe in fresh air and it makes you look at things from a new perspective. So, take morning or lunchtime walks so you may be prepared for the day. You can also do activities like yoga which boosts mindfulness and helps you get mental clarity. It can also calm your mood, and you can also do cardio workouts like cycling and running to give your brain the pump of blood it needs and help you think more clearly and better. 

Fuel Your Brain 

If you want your brain to think clearly, you must provide it with the right type of nutrients, too. You should make a list of foods that are good for your mental health and incorporate them into your daily routine. You can have fruits and vegetables, healthy carbs and proteins as your brain cells need nourishment to think better, too! You should also drink water and get yourself hydrated, as water makes your blood move around the body faster, wakes up your brain, and increases brain function. Also, you can take supplements like chlorella, a high protein plant. Some chlorella benefits include detoxification and improved focus, which are good for mental clarity.

Journalling for Emotional Release

There are some activities, like journalling, that you can do at the end of the day to let go of any stress that your body has. You can write about the things that went wrong in the day and what went well. Take your time to reflect on things so you do not end up overthinking things and overstimulating your brain. You should have a journal by your bed so if you feel like some unprocessed thoughts are coming to you, you can vent them out in your journal, which should help your mental health. 

Sleep Better

Establish a bedtime routine for yourself that is unique to you so that you can look forward to it every night, and it helps you sleep better. You can read a book, lower the brightness of the lights in your room, and have decaffeinated tea or water. You should also avoid screens before going to bed, the LED light is not good for your eyes and does not let you sleep well. The use of screens has proven to have a strong link with less sleep time and delayed sleep. 

Daily activities for your mental health require you to be consistent and true to yourself if you really want to see the results.. So, start with something small like making your bed and practicing mindfulness and then keep on adding some activities to your routine so by the end of a few days, you meet with a better, improved version of yourself, one with a clear mind and better health.

This blog was written by Miranda Spears.

Why Magnesium Baths Are The New Self-Care Ritual by Miranda Spears.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 2 Comments

(image: Pexels: Gabby K)

Self care is so important, so why not try a Magnesium Bath? Magnesium baths rely upon magnesium salts (typically magnesium sulfate or magnesium chloride) dissolved in warm water to create a solution with beneficial qualities. Magnesium ions are absorbed through the skin during your soak through a physical process called transdermal absorption, which relaxes muscles by balancing nerve impulses to muscles, and it also reduces inflammation. Magnesium is also beneficial in the production of cell energy as it helps in the production of ATP and enhances the quality of sleep, due to the control of melatonin release. Here we present five evidence-based ways magnesium baths support physical recovery, skin health, mental clarity,

Deep Absorption of Minerals in Warm Baths to Revitalise Muscles

By soaking in warm water with magnesium bath flakes, you’ll be getting a concentrated dose of this vital mineral that will be absorbed directly into the skin. Magnesium ions penetrate the skin through the flakes, entering the muscles when they disrupt pain transmission and minimise the markers of inflammation. This is selective absorption and initiates recovery of active stress, therefore, heals stiffness as well as increases flexibility. The sources of tensions dissolve, and your previously tensed muscles turn into elastic cords capable of moving in any direction. Habitual soaks enhance soothing properties, so, you can live an active life, without muscle soreness.

Enhancing Mental Clarity with Sensory-Rich Immersion

Warm water helps lighten the burden of daily challenges, and magnesium gratefully taps into neurotransmitters like GABA and tones the impartiality of moods. With every deep breath of subtly scented extra essential oils or plant infusions, every breath is gets a little stronger, until you can relax deeply. You become able to go back into your environment, and you can go and do things in a purposeful manner. Recharging of the mind roots you throughout the day in a state of productivity.

Lifting the Home Spa Atmosphere

More than minerals and water are required to turn a typical bathroom into a sanctuary. You can use soft towels, controllable lights, and adornments that create an atmosphere that welcomes relaxation. Include small-scale candles on the periphery of the tub with flames that provide soft illumination. The slightest bit of greenery helps bring nature inside for relaxation.

Gentle Agents to Boost Skin Health with Nourishment

In addition to relaxing the muscles, a magnesium bath helps to give the skin a glow. The mineral helps to hydrate and repair the cells due to its ability to attract moisture to the epidermal layer. During soaking, scrub a bit with a side brush or natural sponge to scrub off dull cells, and in turn, boost circulation. Pat dry and trap moisture by using a light natural oil or serum, and the skin will absorb the nutrients. As time progresses, you will feel that your skin has become smooth already and has a healthy glow that is a result of constant renewal with the help of minerals, so your skin will feel refreshed too.

Retraining to Have Restful Sleeping Routines

Magnesium soaks in the evenings, prepare you to take a lovely, restorative sleep with the help of balancing various hormones that control your circadian rhythm. The temperature reduction when exiting the bath into cool air is an indication to your body that you should take a rest and relax. You will sleep more comfortably, more deeply, with less anxiety and you should end up waking up in a good mood.

Magnesium baths are refreshing and also spiritually enhancing. Muscles relax, minds can be more focused, skin becomes radiant, and sleep comes as easily as breathing. This habit goes beyond relaxation and becomes a specific gesture of care taken towards yourself, one that re-echoes in all the levels of your life. By doing that, every bath will become the ritual of rejuvenation, a special moment created especially in your favour where the stress of the day is washed away and health prevails.

This article was written by Miranda Spears and contains some sponsored links.

5 Steps to Finding Deeper Inner Peace by Miranda Spears

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Amy Treasure: Unsplash)

In a world of continuous alerts, daily stresses, and the need to be effective, inner peace can be a distant, even impossible idea, but there are still moments- tiny, little corners that speak of peace. The difficulty is to get back to that silence when life is noisy.

These are five easy and considerate steps that can be used to guide the path towards inner peace. All of them need perfection, but most importantly, they need willingness.

1.   Make Room to Pause

The sound of daily life usually overshadows what is important. It does not mean that one has to retreat or change drastically to slow down. Other times, it is just a choice of sitting down and taking a few minutes before rushing out the door or taking a walk without music or any other distractions.

Space is the process of letting the mind breathe. It is in silence that thoughts can settle. The ever-rotating motion starts to decelerate. This is where the foundation of peace is made by creating space in your busy lives.

2.   Listen to the Body

In many cases, the body narrates before the mind can comprehend. The tight shoulders, shallow breathing, and clenched jaws are indications that something is wrong inside. Peace is not only about having the right thoughts, but it is also about feeling safe and being in the body.

That is why physical awareness is important. Observing posture, breath, or tension may be a way to come back to the present. In case you live in the region/USA, somatic healing Orange County specialists can lead this type of body-based consciousness in a more comprehensive, supported manner. They are concerned with making people realise that emotions and experiences are stored in the body, and this can be the gateway to healing and permanent peace.

3.   Make Things as Simple as Possible

It is not possible to have peace in a filthy environment. Whether it is a cluttered room or a cluttered calendar, what fills your space and what fills your time is what defines your feelings on the inside. Simple does not imply giving up everything.

It is a matter of making decisions that can really promote well-being.  It can be as easy as removing two or three items that you do not need, like saying no without feeling guilty, or emptying the small drawer that has been cluttered up long ago.

All small streamlining gestures say something that life does not need to be hectic, and in most cases, there is peace beyond the clutter.           

Each small act of streamlining says something: Life does not need to be busy, and in many cases, there is peace on the other side of the clutter.

4.   Gentle Self-Honesty

Peace does not imply evading harsh realities. Actually, one of the most obvious ways to become whole is honesty, which is said in a kind way to oneself. This type of honesty is not judgmental. It is about the soft question of what you really need, or if this is how you want to live.

Truthful contemplation can raise painful feelings. It also brings clarity. And in that clarity, peace may start to grow.

5.   Find Time for Others

Life has its moments of greater meaning, the sunrise, laughing with a loved one, or doing something nice to a stranger without any reward. These are the times that make you remember that you are more than the to-do list.

Inner peace can be found by looking at meaningful moments, not urgent moments. It is the act of paying attention to what is joyful, awing, or connecting. These experiences satisfy something within that nothing in terms of productivity or distraction ever can.

The more meaningful moments are embraced, the more they increase, and in them, there comes a feeling of peace that does not rise and fall with the day.

Conclusion

Inner peace is not a place to visit. It is a soft manner of getting around in the world, of being with yourself in a kind and openhearted way.

The small moments are the beginning of peace. It is fed by being there, fed by telling the truth, and cultivated by being in touch with the body, with others, and with what is most important.

This blog was written by Miranda Spears

Living With Imposter Syndrome As A Writer by Eleanor

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 2 Comments

(image: Unsplash)

I wrote about this a little bit a few days ago on my Instagram and Facebook but thought I would write a longer blog here.

So here goes…

In 2016, I started this little blog as a place to share my emotions and feelings around living with anxiety and panic attacks, processing trauma I had been through a few years before and just as a place to vent to family and friends. Nearly 10 years later, I and many contributors have kept this wonderful corner of the internet going and I am very grateful.

From 2016 onwards, I began to write my heart for mental health charities and national publications after sending pitch emails to them about my more unusual story of being diagnosed with bipolar at 16 and hospitalised twice by 25. At the time, bipolar was way less talked about (with psychosis and hospitalisation still a major taboo) and I wanted to be a part of changing that.

Amazingly everything started to click into place after I began online networking with editos… I was writing articles for Metro.co.uk regularly on mental health (Thank you Yvette!), I was featured in Glamour and the Telegraph (thank you editors!), I started writing for Jewish community papers and for a new magazine at the time, Happiful. Then, I decided I wanted to submit my journey with bipolar from 16 onwards to Trigger Publishing as a memoir and signed with them for a book deal in 2018. 2018 was a year of manifestation and synchronicity for me in many areas of my life.

Then, I was asked to write my story to be featured in the Book of Hope by my friends Jonny Benjamin MBE and Britt Pfluger alongside celebrities including Dame Kelly Holmes, Zoella, Alastair Campbell ,Elizabeth Day, Joe Wicks and many others including friends in the mental health writing world. Seeing my name on the cover alongside all these successful people I admired was something else and again my story of hope against adversity was being shared globally to help people who needed it.

My own book Bring me to Light came out in November 2019 just a few months before the Covid Pandemic and so I couldn’t get out there to promote it fully but it still did well on Amazon and was sold in Waterstones and globally. Its something I am hugely proud of despite sometimes feeling shy that my story is out there for all tom read.

Since 2020, I have kept blogging, writing for Metro.co.uk from time to time and I finally self published my children’s book Arabella and the Worry Cloud. However, imposter syndrome has really kicked in, let me explain.

The start of my writing career happened when I was unemployed due to my mental health. I had to leave a face to face teaching job due to my anxiety. I had no idea that this little blog for friends and family would turn into so much. In fact I would say it was a total whirlwind. I was only 30 when I signed my book deal (independently without an agent). I was just 28 when I started writing openly about my mental health and I often feel like an imposter! That little voice that says you’re not good enough because…

I am an independent writer which means I don’t yet have an agent but I have been published before by several publishers and I have also self published my kids book. So I worry that I won’t ever find an agent, that my dream of being a professional author with a team around me (agent, marketing team, earning good money from my craft) seems out of reach. In this industry as well when you pitch to agents to take on your book, it comes with a lot of rejection. My children’s book for example was rejected by Pan Macmillan (although I was fortunate to know someone there who was able to look at my manuscript). I know I need to keep going to help others, but sometimes it feels super lonely and you have to be so resilient. Rejection is normal but its hard.

I chose not to go into journalism full time in a news room for health reasons but I love to write freelance from home and hope to continue to do so.

I guess I feel like an imposter because my career that I did work hard for, came after my former editor Yvette connected with me on Twitter, she liked my blog and commissioned me to write mental health articles (despite at that point never meeting). This was the same for so many incredible editors who gave me their time and knowledge including Naomi Greenaway at the Telegraph , Deborah Joseph (formerly of Glamour) and Rebecca at Happiful. I truly feel blessed these women championed me and my writing.

So I guess what I want to say is that its OK to feel like you aren’t there yet, like you aren’t good enough, like the mountain of where you want to be is too hard to climb. What I have found is when people believe in you, in your ideas, in your story and when you can find that inner confidence and believe in yourself- incredible things can happen. You can manifest your dreams and I do believe one day more will manifest (even if my little imposter voice speaks up).

I want to end this story with something quite relevant that haunts me to this day. I was staying at my Dads when I was writing my first book, in the middle of the Buckinghamshire countryside at the time. I was more ‘high profile’ in the mental health world and very prolific on Twitter back in 2018-19 and so I received an email invitation from a producer at BBC Women’s Hour for a segment they were doing about bipolar. She asked if I would come on the show to talk about it. My fear/ panic about being exposed and too seen (and not worthy) meant I didn’t feel able to do it and I have kicked myself ever since! If anyone from Women’s Hour is reading this (haha) please do get back in touch!

But seriously- sometimes fear and anxiety stops us from doing what we most want to do but are too frightened to do. I still feel scared to give talks about my kids book. I look at others on Instagram who are Sunday Times Bestsellers and have agents and I think to myself….will I ever get there? Unfortunately social media comparisonitis at age 36 (i know I am still young) is still rife.

I think I have to remember that its OK to feel like this, as my friends have told me, so many creatives do. And its ok to take my time, work hard and see where it lands. It’s also OK to take other jobs while being a writer isn’t paying a main income too. I feel imposter syndrome in other areas of my life too but thats a blog for another day.

Do you feel imposter syndrome?

Thanks for reading,

Ellie x

9th Blog Anniversary of Be Ur Own Light!

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Ginger Ray)

Whenever 1st March rolls around, I feel a tremendous sense of pride but also – how has it been so many years since I started blogging on WordPress about my mental health?

Be Ur Own Light Blog started on 1st March 2016 after I had had to leave a face to face job because I was having panic attacks and couldn’t get in to work. I saw blogging as a form of therapy.. and in truth, I was only originally sharing with friends and family because I felt really alone with it. That eventually snowballed into me writing for Rethink Mental Illness and then in the national media, speaking at a few in-person events and recording podcasts. It was also an honour to be included in several books including ‘The Book of Hope’ by Jonny Benjamin MBE and Britt Pfluger, talking about life with bipolar.

There’s times I still feel alone with my health but I also have so much support and understanding from family and friends and readers here too, which helps a great deal.

I just want to thank everyone we have collaborated with in the past year (sponsored or not)- brands, charities, businesses, individuals making a difference in the mental health world. Thank you for writing blogs for Be Ur Own Light and our personal mission of taking a sledgehammer to the stigma of mental illness (or trying to!).

Thank you also to everyone who has promoted or bought my books, especially my recent kids book ‘Arabella and the Worry Cloud’. I am so proud of ‘Bring me to Light’ too and hope sharing my story continues to help people.

If you’ve been following this journey for 9 years (or longer)- thank YOU for being here for the ride and continuing to read, support and show up.

It has been harder for me in the past 2 years to authentically share everything about my mental health and other health things on here but one day I hope that our journey can inspire others. I live in remission from Bipolar due to my medications holding me and I never forget daily how lucky I am to have access to mental health medications (due to living in the UK) and an excellent therapist, plus support from family.

Going forward, I will still be blogging but I am hoping that the sequel to Arabella and the Worry Cloud will manifest soon. I have written it, I just need the funds to secure everything! Shout out to my friend and illustrator Shelley. I hope also that Arabella will continue to reach more children and find it’s way to all who need its message.

Thank you all of you for enabling me to blog and write and hopefully help people with bipolar, depression, anxiety, PTSD, panic attacks etc. Thank you to every person who has read a blog, bought a book, shared an article, commissioned me in the press to write an article on mental health or current affairs and to all who have or continue to believe in me- including my amazing husband and family. and of course G-d who is behind everything.

Love and gratitude,

Ellie x

Understanding The Connection Between Hair Loss And Mental Health.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Tamara Bellis)

For many of us, our hair is a part of our identity, a form of self-expression, and a source of confidence. So, when hair loss strikes, it can feel like a punch to the gut, leaving us feeling vulnerable, insecure, and even depressed.

But while hair loss presents real challenges, there are ways to face this struggle while protecting your mental well-being. Reframing your mindset, finding new ways to express yourself, and seeking support can help you regain control.

The Emotional Toll of Hair Loss

Hair loss can hit hard because it’s tied to how we see ourselves. Here are some reasons it can be emotionally challenging:

Loss of Confidence

Losing your hair can make you feel like you’re losing part of your identity or attractiveness. You might find yourself avoiding mirrors, skipping social events, or feeling uneasy at work.

The good news? You can take steps to rebuild your confidence. Start by seeing a doctor or dermatologist to figure out what’s causing your hair loss — whether it’s genetics, hormones, or another health condition. They can guide you toward hair loss treatments like minoxidil or hair restoration options.

Loss of Control

Hair loss can feel like an unpredictable journey, especially when it stems from factors like genetics, health conditions, or medications. This lack of control over the situation can leave you feeling frustrated and powerless. However, arming yourself with knowledge and seeking professional guidance can help restore a sense of agency.

Fear of Social Stigma

Society often equates a full head of hair with youth and attractiveness, making hair loss feel like a big deal. You might worry about judgment or feel isolated. Remember: hair loss is incredibly common, and embracing it on your own terms can help you regain confidence.

How Hair Loss Affects Mental Health

(image: towfiqu, Unsplash)

Hair loss isn’t just a cosmetic issue; it can have a significant emotional impact. Here’s how it might affect you:

  • Anxiety and stress: Constantly worrying about your hair can create a cycle of stress. Unfortunately, stress can worsen hair loss (a condition called telogen effluvium). Breaking this cycle means addressing both the physical and emotional sides of the issue.
  • Depression: For some people, hair loss can lead to feelings of sadness, hopelessness, or even depression. It’s not just about appearance — it’s about feeling disconnected from yourself and others. If these feelings persist, talking to a therapist can help.
  • Social withdrawal: When you feel self-conscious about your hair, it’s easy to retreat from social interactions. You might avoid events, gatherings, or even everyday conversations because you feel like everyone is noticing your hair. Over time, this isolation can make you feel lonelier and less confident.

Supporting Mental Health During Hair Loss

Dealing with hair loss can be an emotional rollercoaster, but there are practical steps you can take to protect your mental health and rebuild your confidence.

Seek Professional Guidance

Therapists can help you work through the emotions tied to hair loss. Techniques like cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can help shift negative thought patterns and build resilience. Joining a support group — online or in-person—can also be a great way to connect with others who understand what you’re going through.

Explore Your Treatment Options

Today’s hair loss treatments offer more choices than ever. Depending on the cause, options might include medications, topical treatments like minoxidil, or even surgical procedures like hair transplants. Consulting a dermatologist can help you create a personalized plan.

Experiment with Alternatives

While waiting for long-term treatments to work, consider wigs, toppers or hairpieces. These options have come a long way in terms of comfort, quality, and appearance. They can provide a confidence boost and allow you to experiment with different looks without committing to permanent changes.

Prioritize Your Overall Health

Your overall health plays a big role in how you feel — and even in the health of your hair. A balanced diet with nutrients like iron, zinc, and biotin can support hair growth. Regular exercise helps manage stress and boosts your mood, which can also help with certain types of hair loss.

Lean on Your Support System

Talking to friends or family members you trust can make a huge difference. Sharing your feelings with someone who listens and offers encouragement can help you feel less alone and more supported.

Hair loss is a personal journey, and it’s normal to feel a mix of emotions as you go through it. The most important thing is to focus on what makes you feel empowered. Whether it’s exploring treatment options, connecting with supportive communities, or finding new ways to express yourself, you have the tools to take charge of your well-being.

No matter where you are in your journey, help is available. With the right support and resources, you can move forward with confidence.

This blog was written by a freelance writer and contains paid links.