8 Ways I Deal with Anxiety as a Mom (Mum) by Kara Reynolds.

(image: Pexels: Gustavo Fring)

Anxiety is hard to manage. When you have children, your stress levels can skyrocket. You have to get it under control to stay sane. 

Fortunately, you have plenty of holistic methods that help — often as much as medication or therapy. Here are eight ways I deal with anxiety as a mom. I hope these tips help you, too. 

1. I Maintain a Healthy Social Circle 

Loneliness can kill. A national cross-sectional survey found an association between patients who reported feeling isolated and increased mortality from all causes. 

I don’t know what I would do without my other mom friends. While it’s challenging for us to all coordinate our schedules to meet up as a group, I make a point to get together at least once a week with someone outside of my family for tea or a nice partner workout. It helps us both feel more connected and lets us shuffle off our mortal mom-coats for a minute and celebrate ourselves, not our roles in life. 

2. I Practice Breath Control 

Regulating your breath (like in childbirth) can help calm physiological processes. 

Focusing on your inhalations and exhalations alone helps you slow down your pace of breathing. Techniques such as 2-to-1 breathing, where you exhale for twice as long as you inhale, can further help to relax you. Navy SEALS use a method where they inhale for four, pause for as many beats, then exhale for the same count to calm their panic in crises. 

3. I Choose My Mental Battles Carefully 

As a mom, you see danger everywhere. I used to drive myself mad every time my kids strayed from my sight, but I learned to pick my mental battles more carefully as they got older. 

For example, I could lie awake tossing and turning all night, wondering if the parents at my child’s sleepover drink or take drugs in front of the kids. Conversely, I could simply meet with them before the big night and assuage my fears. 

4. I Check-in With My Body 

You know that you get irritable when you have a cold. However, minor aches and pains can sometimes leave you snapping at loved ones without realising the underlying cause. My back might groan after a day at my desk, but taking it out on my family only creates more problems. 

Therefore, I’ve learned to check in with my body regularly. I made mindful body scans a part of my routine meditation practice. These days, I do them anytime and anywhere, taking a few moments to breathe into tight areas and ease mild pain. 

5. I Move When I Don’t Feel Like It

Who hasn’t had those days where going to the gym seems like a chore? Yet, I’ve also discovered that pushing through often makes me feel better than remaining stationary. I trick myself into moving even when I don’t feel like it. 

How? I tell myself that I will work out for only five minutes. I give myself full permission to stop if I still feel lousy and sluggish after that time. However, I usually find the energy to keep going once my blood starts flowing. 

6. I Eat Healthfully — Most of the Time 

I used to go to diet extremes. Sometimes, I’d throw caution to the wind, declaring, “life’s short. Eat a donut.” Other times, I’d go on strict diets, eschewing everything that didn’t fit the meal plan until I went slightly crazy and binged. 

Now, I practice the 80/20 rule when it comes to eating. I eat foods that fall into my approved “healthy” categories 80% of the time. For the remaining 20%, I indulge in whatever I like. 

7. I Stay Away From Alcohol

A funny thing happened to me during pregnancy. Despite the increased pressure with a new life on the way, I felt less anxious. It didn’t take more than one or two postpartum cocktails to discern the reason. 

Alcohol messes with all kinds of neurotransmitters. While it initially decreases feelings of tension, it comes roaring back with a vengeance when you sober up and your brain tries to return to homeostasis. You could find yourself feeling even more tense and irritable — and craving another drink to take the edge off. 

For me, it’s simply easier to pass on the anxious feelings altogether. I found healthier ways to relax. 

8. I Meditate 

Although it may look like I’m doing nothing, my meditation time is the most critical part of my day. Without it, I wouldn’t function nearly as well in daily life. 

You don’t need anything except three to five minutes of quiet time each day to start. If you sit silently in mindfulness, you’ll amaze yourself with how long even that short span seems the first few times. If you struggle, guided meditations can help you find zen, and they’re available free on YouTube. 

Moms, How Do You Deal With Anxiety as a Parent?

The eight tips above help me deal with anxiety as a mom. I hope that this advice will likewise help you decrease your stress levels. 

This article was written by Kara Reynolds, editor of Momish

How to Spot Signs of a Traumatic Brain Injury by Lizzie Weakley

(image: Pexels- Karolina Grabowska)

Suffering a traumatic brain injury can completely change a person’s life. Your brain is the primary organ that controls everything else in your body, and any injury to your brain has the potential to impact almost every other aspect of your body, your health, and your overall wellbeing. While most severe brain injuries can be quickly spotted, more minor or moderate traumatic brain injuries can sometimes go undetected. Although some injuries may heal on their own, others can cause serious issues days, months, or even years down the road. For this reason, it is essential that you understand the possible signs of traumatic brain injuries to ensure you get proper medical help whenever it is needed.

Types of Traumatic Brain Injury

Traumatic brain injuries are categorized in several ways, depending on both the severity and type of injury. They can range from mild to moderate and severe, and this is determined by whether a person loses consciousness as a result of the injury and for how long. Mild brain injuries result in a loss of consciousness or a dazed feeling that lasts less than 30 minutes, while severe injuries are those that result in unconsciousness for more than 24 hours.

Traumatic brain injuries are also categorized based on whether they are open or closed. Closed injuries are the most common type, and this categorisation refers to any injury that affects the brain without penetrating the skull. An open brain injury results when any foreign object penetrates the skull and directly damages the brain tissue.

How to Spot Signs of a Concussion or Other Brain Injury

Moderate to severe brain injuries and open brain injuries are obviously fairly easy to spot. However, it is often much more difficult to determine if you’ve suffered a mild concussion or less severe brain injury. Still, there are a number of signs you can watch out for. The most obvious sign is losing consciousness, but feeling confused or having problems concentrating or remembering can also be indicators of a brain injury. Nausea, vomiting, and dizziness are also signs you should watch out for.

How it Can Affect Your Mental Health

Soon after a traumatic brain injury, it’s common to have feelings of frustration, loss, and sadness. These feelings tend to appear after the injury, during, or soon after recovery. These emotions can be brought up earlier or later, depending on the person, and how severe the injury is. If these feelings are not recognised early enough, depression can be a long-lasting emotion, which can be detrimental to your mental health.

What to Do If You Suspect You Have a Brain Injury

Even milder or moderate concussions can potentially lead to other issues down the road. Therefore, it is essential that you seek professional medical attention if you suspect you or someone you know has experienced a brain injury. Depending on where the accident or injury occurred, it may also be a good idea to contact an attorney. This is especially true if the injury happened as a result of a car accident or at work. In these cases, an auto injury attorney or a job site accident lawyer can help ensure everything is properly documented and that you don’t do anything that could harm your chances of getting properly compensated for your injury.

Concussions and other traumatic brain injuries are much more common than you might think. Brain injuries can also occur from seemingly minor accidents. Therefore, it is vital that you know what signs to look for, so you can immediately get whatever help you need.

Lizzie Weakley is a freelance writer.

On my Therapy Journey to Being Free: I Choose Life. By Eleanor

Image: notsalmon.com

I started back in therapy consistently (weekly), 2 months ago in August after reoccurrence of panic attacks. I have been working with a really brilliant therapist for the past two years who is a specialist in trauma and EMDR therapy. EMDR stands for eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy and is a way to help you process and confront traumatic memories, with the aim of reducing their impact on your life. Its a very good therapy for people struggling from PTSD (Post traumatic stress disorder). Although I do not have the full disorder, I do have some PTSD symptoms according to a therapy questionnaire, from being sectioned and in hospital in 2014 and other traumas that occurred around the same time.

My PTSD symptoms include:

– Panic attacks (palpitations, sweating, negative thoughts, fight or flight adrenaline and needing to cancel feared event) triggered by certain situations which remind me of the past traumatic events. This includes fear of medical appointments now including going to hospitals for myself or the drs surgery.

– Social anxiety- what will they think of me?

-Other fears over traumatic events – i can get triggered and feel flooded with panic.

So, as you can see, a lot to deal with and unpack in therapy. And figuring out my identity as a 33 year old woman with bipolar disorder (thankfully stable) and what the future could hold.

I have to say that finding an excellent therapist has been a lifesaver. I look back to where I was 2 months ago and generally (without jinxing it) my nervous system has calmed down a lot, I have been anxious but able to enter certain situations I couldn’t have done 8 weeks ago. My medications keep my mind stable and my husband and family are a wonderful support too. I love my work and can do it from home. I am really lucky in so many ways.

It is still a major work in progress for me, getting back to the person I once was. I prefer to work from home and I also am unable to go out as much alone as I would want. However, I am starting to go out more with others and I will keep working to find freedom from fear for myself.

If you’re feeling stuck or alone or fearful, reach for help. I have been very lucky to have help with funding my therapy sessions (shout out to my incredible parents) but they are so needed. I know not everyone has this.. the waiting lists for the NHS are so long and I was on them for years without support. My local borough also does not fund trauma therapy which was frustrating at the time.

Thanks for reading the update, feel free to share your therapy experiences with me,

i feel quite emotional writing and sharing this with you! And remember- to keep reaching, growing, and above all healing. Healing is so important for our mental health if you can access it,

Eleanor x

PS- while writing this blog. I was listening to the Sugababes originals Mutya, Keisha and Siobhan (MKS) sing No regrets which has the lyrics.. ‘I choose life’ . Listen here to this live version (not an ad, genuine love): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MfdYE7BkEsw

5 Ways to Improve your Mental Wellbeing

When it comes to taking care of yourself, you should always put your mental health first. 1 in 4 people in England alone will experience a mental health problem each year, so we must be gentle with ourselves. However, modern life can be hectic, and sometimes it can be exceedingly difficult to find time to take care of yourself and your mind. So, what can you try to improve your mental well-being?

Credit: Tumisu/ Pixabay

Take regular time out

If you do not take time out to yourself each day, you will soon feel burnt out and struggle to manage your emotions. This could just be in the form of taking a nice relaxing bath in the evenings and completing your daily skincare routine. Or, you could watch an episode of your favourite show after a hard day’s work. Whatever works for you! You do not need to be doing something productive either; an evening in with Netflix can be just as good for your mental health as an evening spent cleaning or reading. After spending some time on yourself, you will feel more relaxed, and your mind will be more at ease.

Try yoga

Yoga can be a great form of exercise that will also help you focus and practice mindfulness. In addition, yoga can be a great choice for stress management, and attending a yoga class or taking an online class at home can leave you feeling ready for bed and content. If you are not a fan of yoga, then you could try daily stretches. Just ten or fifteen minutes spent stretching can make you feel flexible and can be a great way of winding down at the end of the day. Stretching is also a great way to start your day and can help set your mind at the beginning of the day so that way you are as productive and happy as you can be throughout the day.

Exercise

Exercise is a great way of taking your mind off any troubles you may be experiencing, and even just ten minutes of exercise will leave you feeling much better. When you exercise, your body releases endorphins, which make people feel happy and less anxious. However, when you are feeling down, it can be difficult to convince yourself to get up and complete a workout, but even just ten minutes of one of Chloe Ting’s workouts, for example, can leave you feeling happier. 

Some people struggle to complete workouts due to an illness, but there is a form of exercise out there for everyone! If you experience arthritis for example, there are exercise machines that are easy on joints that you could try! Or, if you find cardio too difficult due to a health condition such as asthma, you could try a more gentle form of exercise such as walking or cycling.

Credit: pxhere

Try herbal teas

Herbal teas are great at helping you unwind and are more relaxing than normal tea or coffee, which may only increase your anxiety and make you feel more stressed. Herbal teas, particularly chamomile tea, can ease feelings of anxiety or depression, as well as boost your immune system and aid your digestive system. So, herbal teas are great for both your body and mind! However, you should keep in mind that herbal teas are not a cure for mental illness and that if you are worried about the state of your mental well-being, you should consult a professional for help. 

Eat well

As much as we all love chocolate and pizza, sometimes these foods can leave us feeling bloated and grumpy. Therefore, you should still eat these foods because they are yummy, but you should make sure that you also eat lots of healthy foods that will make you feel better. For example, Brazil nuts are known to help improve people’s moods because they reduce inflammation and are a good source of Vitamin E, making Brazil nuts a great snack choice if you’re feeling a bit down in the dumps. Other foods such as seeds, fatty fish, and leafy greens can all help improve your mood.

Listen to ASMR

ASMR has been rising in popularity over the past few years. It is a niche genre of videos on YouTube where ASMRtists (the name for YouTubers who dedicate their channels to the strange sensation) brush your hair, whisper, and perform soothing sounds. Watching ASMR can reduce your anxiety, help you fall asleep at night, and soothe you. There are hundreds of ASMR videos online, so if you find that ASMR does help you unwind and relax, then there are plenty of videos out there for you to see. 

Meet with friends

Sometimes when you are feeling low, what you need is a good laugh with friends. As difficult as it may seem, get in touch with them and ask them if they want to meet for a coffee or go for some evening drinks. Even if you find that your state of mental health is not allowing you to enjoy your time with them, you could try and talk to your friends about how you’re feeling. Talking about your mental struggles and how they make you feel can ease your burdens and help your friends understand why you are not as perky or upbeat as you usually are. 

Credit: Glenn Harper/ Flickr

Tidy your home

It may sound silly, but tidying up your home or workspace can make a massive difference to your mental state. Tidy space, tidy mind! The act of cleaning and tidying itself can be very therapeutic and can help you relax. Once you have finished tidying up, you will find that you probably feel a lot less overwhelmed, particularly if your home is particularly cluttered or messy. A messy room can overload your mind because you are thinking about all the things you have to clear away and constantly searching for items you have lost amongst the mess.

When it comes to taking care of yourself, you should always put your mental health first. 1 in 4 people in England alone will experience a mental health problem each year, so we must be gentle with ourselves. However, modern life can be hectic, and sometimes it can be exceedingly difficult to find time to take care of yourself and your mind. So, what can you try to improve your mental well-being?

This article was written by a freelance writer.

What you need to know about Post Partum Depression (PPD) by Kara Reynolds

(image: Lisa at Pexels)

Postpartum depression (PPD) is a severe medical condition that many mothers experience. It’s a condition that occurs to a mother after she gives birth to a newborn. You might be feeling hopeless as you try to be a mother — maybe your birthing process didn’t go as planned, or perhaps you’re having trouble breastfeeding. 

The symptoms of PPD can last a long time. They’re severe as well, and if left untreated, you could develop something more serious that may pose a danger to you or your child. It’s essential to learn about postpartum depression to know if this is happening to you or even your loved one. 

Know that if you have PPD, it is not your fault. It’s a medical condition that requires treatment if you want to get better. Here’s what you need to know about PPD so you can keep yourself, your loved one and the baby healthy and safe. 

Defining Postpartum Depression

Postpartum depression is a medical condition associated with extreme feelings of worry, sadness, tiredness and hopelessness that women experience after giving birth. These feelings can last a long time, making it hard for new moms to take care of themselves and the baby. 

This condition can occur any time after childbirth. Even though it usually starts within a few weeks after having a baby, it can begin later, too, even up to a year after birth. It often doesn’t go away on its own and needs professional treatment to get better. 

Although it is common for people to feel sad or empty, it’s not common for it to last as long as it does with PPD. It’s also not an expected part of becoming a mother. PPD affects your behaviour and physical health and gets in the way of day-to-day life.

It’s Not the Same as Baby Blues

More women experience baby blues after childbirth, but this is not the same as postpartum depression. Baby blues have similar symptoms of PPD, but those feelings don’t last nearly as long and usually go away naturally after a few days or a week. PPD symptoms last much longer and the emotions are more intense.

Baby blues are more like mood swings. New mothers have to grapple with being a mum for the first time and everything that goes with it. Of course, they’re going to feel anxious, stressed and upset at times. The sudden hormonal changes can do a lot to a woman’s mind and body, but the hormones eventually level out and women can handle the feelings independently. 

It’s Fairly Common

You are not alone if you suffer from postpartum depression. In fact, about one in eight women will experience PPD in their lifetime. Postpartum depression estimates can vary by state, age and race, and can be as high as one in five women in some parts of the world. 

Additionally, PPD is often higher for first-time mothers. However, it can happen to mothers who have had many kids, and it can reoccur in each pregnancy. Rates may be even higher than estimates because not all women will report or seek help if they think they have postpartum depression. PPD is more common in women who have had a history of depression, too.

It Can Affect Your Child

Postpartum depression can make it more difficult for you to care for yourself and also your baby. If your PPD goes on without treatment: 

  • You might end up skipping your postpartum checkups for you and your baby, which can lead to other health and developmental problems.
  • It may be more challenging to bond with your child, which can affect breastfeeding.
  • Your newborn may not get the medical attention they need.

Getting the proper treatment and recognising that you or a loved one may be suffering from PPD can better the chances of the new baby thriving. 

It Comes with Many Signs and Symptoms

Mothers will often feel overwhelmed when they bring their new babies home. There are regular hormonal changes that occur, and being a mother poses a new lifestyle all in itself. However, there are signs and symptoms that may be leading to PPD. If these occur for more than two weeks, then you need to seek medical attention: 

  • Feeling hopeless, sad and overwhelmed
  • Crying more than normal
  • Having thoughts of harming yourself or your baby
  • Feeling like a bad mother or worthless
  • Changing sleep patterns
  • Withdrawing from friends, family and life in general
  • Not having any interest in your newborn
  • Eating too little or too much
  • Having physical pains, like headaches and stomach aches, that won’t go away

New mothers or even mums who have had other children may feel ashamed or embarrassed if they feel depressed (although its OK to feel this way) and may not seek the help they need. You don’t have to suffer, though — reach out to a doctor if you or someone you know experiences these symptoms.

It Can Be Prevented

While PPD is treatable, it can also be somewhat prevented. If you have had depression in the past, you can get counselling before giving birth to discuss your feelings about having a child. 

Two kinds of counselling can work best to prevent PPD for women at an increased risk. The first is cognitive-behavioural therapy, which helps you manage negative thoughts by changing your thoughts and actions. The second is interpersonal therapy, which helps you identify and deal with problems in your life. 

It’s Treatable

There is hope for those who have PPD. The earlier you seek medical help, though, the better off you and your baby will be. Common types of treatment for postpartum depression include therapy, medicines prescribed by your doctor and, in severe cases, electroconvulsive therapy. 

At home, you should rest as much as possible. Additionally, talk to your partner, join a support group and make time to visit with other people.

Take It One Day at a Time

With time and support, you can make it through this season of Post partum depression. You are not alone.

This article was written by writer Kara Reynolds, editor in chief at Momish.

4 Ways to Make Your Mental Health a Priority in your Life by Emma Sturgis

Because of the stress and fear caused by the pandemic, more people are coming forward to talk about their mental health struggles. Mental health conditions, such as anxiety and depression, affect millions of people around the world. The inability to cope with stressful events as well as other factors can lead to an increase in mental illness.

When you make taking care of your mental health a priority, you will be surprised at how many ways there are to help a variety of mental health issues. Here are four simple but effective ways to improve your mental health.  

(image: Pexels)

Practice Mindfulness 

According to the UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center, mindfulness improves mood disorders such as anxiety and depression.   Some people are skeptical about how mindfulness can create such positive results, but it really only takes a few days of regular practice to prove to yourself that being aware of what you do when you do it focuses your mind. When your mind is focused on a task in the present moment, it won’t engage in depressing or anxious thoughts. Definitely give it a go and see if it works for you.

Exercise Regularly If You Can

Physical activity is an excellent way to manage depression and improve your mental health.  Physical activity boosts the release of mood-enhancing chemicals in your brain. These endorphins can help reduce any feelings of sadness or anxiety, alongside other treatment. Exercise also increases blood flow to the brain, which can make you feel more energised and happier.  Furthermore, physical activity can help people cope with stress better by improving their coping skills due to the endorphin boost or just being outside in fresh air. Exercise is also a great way to spend time with others in a social setting such as an exercise class or do some gentle exercise at home.

Eat Healthy Meals 

Diet is an important part of our lives, we should make sure that we eat a balanced diet in order to nourish both our bodies and souls. There are many healthy food options to choose from which help you to look after your body and mind. For example, why not try the nutritional goods on offer on the Gold Bee website, such as the natural honey and coconut oil that can be added to many meals of your choice. 

Get Professional Mental Health Assistance   

Talking to a psychiatrist can help you learn how to deal with your mental health condition. It’s especially important to be able to get professional assistance when dealing with a life-altering event or trauma. Talking about your feelings, fears, and worries alleviates stress and can help mental illness. 

Try these four ways to improve your mental health. Mindfulness increases productivity and reduces stress. Physical activity benefits your mental health in many ways. Following a balanced diet nourishes both body and mind. Talking to a mental health professional can help mental health recovery.

Moving House? 5 tips to deal with Moving Stress and Depression.

(image: pexels)

Moving to a new place can be exciting, particularly when the reasons behind your move are positive – a better job, for example, a bigger, more spacious pad, moving in with your partner, and so on.

However, after you’re done with the hard work – house hunting, packing, scheduling a good intestate or local moving company etc. – the initial excitement can slowly dissipate, leaving you with all sorts of mixed feelings.

During the packing or cleanup process, renting a dumpster can be a practical way to handle unwanted items or debris – if you need help with this, you can easily rent a dumpster in your area for a stress-free solution.

Exhaustion and uncertainty are common ones that most people deal with, but others also find themselves battling fear and anxiety or worse still, stress and depression. In fact, post-move depression is real and there’s even a name for it: relocation depression.

It’s something you’ve probably experienced before but felt hesitant to discuss with anyone as you were not sure how they would interpret it or perceive you.

However, it’s important to highlight the fact that it is absolutely okay to have relocation depression. People are wired differently. While there are those who are quick to adapt to their new environment after moving, there are also those who find the changes a bit too much and might need some time to settle in.

Which is okay. The associated changes that a house move brings and all the emotional upheaval associated with it can make it hard to readjust to your new enclave, especially if we’re talking an interstate move.

Moving is one of life’s major transitions and there’s a reason many people consider it one of the most stressful events. Keeping that in mind alone should provide a good foundation to start working on moving-related stress and depression you may suffer post-move.

That aside, we also thought we would share some tips that can help you deal with relocation syndrome should you find it rearing its ugly head after moving.

Here then, are 5 tips that can help you emerge from it feeling better.

Establish a support system

Isolation can amplify depression, relocation or otherwise. Establishing a support system in a new place is not easy, especially if you have no friends or family members nearby. But that doesn’t mean there are no alternatives.

Keeping in touch with friends and family back “home” is one way to help with the adjustment. So is joining some local support groups or seeking professional help.

Having just a single person to help you cope with this challenging transition can make a world of difference.

Get outside of your house and explore

Going outside and interacting with the world may feel like the last thing you want to do when dealing with depression. You may feel inclined to lock yourself inside and battle the demons alone.

Thing is, though, getting outside and exploring your new town or city can surprisingly feel revitalizing.

That’s not to mean you need to head out the day following your move. Feel free to get in touch with your feelings first but avoid getting cooped up too much.

Cozy up your home

This might sound like a contradiction of our previous tip, but that point we just alluded to about taking some time for yourself at home first before exploring the new surrounds might be a good idea. After all, the unpacking will still be waiting for you to deal with.

Spend some time settling in and making your new home a comfortable space. This will be your retreat from all the chaos of the outside world and inside your head. You need it to feel homely and welcoming.


If you can manage it. Before moving day do a cleanup of your new place as cleaner environments can have a positive effect on your mood. Open the windows for ventilation and put down some familiar scents to help you feel more at home. 
 
Some cleaning professionals offer pre-move services which can ease the burden of tasks if there is deep cleaning to do. Similarly, a gardener or Gutter Cleaning Staten Island professional can deep clean the garden and house exterior. Often the less you have to do personally, the less stress can accumulate.

Start a new hobby (or two)

The idea of picking up a hobby is not to escape from the real feelings you’re battling with inside. By all means, feel free to embrace what you’re feeling, however unpalatable it may feel like.

However, engaging in a new (or old) hobby can give you a jolt of excitement that you so badly need during this time.

Some good ideas include joining the gym within a week or two of relocating or better yet, taking up running if it’s something you’ve never done before.

Other ideas include visiting art and cultural centers in town, going to the library, exploring cafés, restaurants, and museums, or joining some local clubs – chess, reading, bible study etc.

Meet some new people

Socializing might not come naturally to some of us, but humans are inherently social creatures and even the most introverted of us crave some interaction every now and then.

You don’t have to go out with the sole mission of making friends: the activities we just mentioned in the previous point can all be opportunities to meet new people and hopefully strike up new relationships.

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Why we must prioritise Mental Health on the World Stage- Simone Biles, Naomi Osaka and reactions. By Eleanor

(image Pinterest)

Yesterday, I woke up to hear that the Olympic gold medal winning athlete Simone Biles – the most decorated and greatest gymnast of all time, pulled out of the Tokyo olympics, citing mental health reasons. Instantly, she was criticised by people for not being a team player, for going to the Olympics in the first place, for daring to reveal that she is human and she struggled.

Gymnastics can be a dangerous sport if you are not in the right mindset and after not feeling her best, Biles withdrew from the competition. She still stood in the glare of the world media to support her team though!

We live in a toxic society that still doesn’t understand the mind- or anything they cannot see. Whether like Naomi Osaka, who withdrew from Wimbledon, its stress, anxiety, depression or burn out/exhaustion, the reasons are valid. Just like sportspeople pull out for physical injuries, mental injuries are just as justifiable and important. The brain is an organ and it can break too.

If we look at Simone Biles and her background, which I didn’t know until looking into it, she was sexually abused by her gymnastics coach as a child. She also comes from a difficult upbringing. She will therefore be carrying trauma in her life which could get triggered by the pressures that come with the Olympics and being the most visible and famous gymnast in USA history. She is only 24.

There is a certain columnist/journalist in the UK who writes and attacks women in the public eye with mental health issues constantly. it doesn’t matter if they could be depressed, anxious, burnt out or suicidal. It doesn’t matter if they have disclosed they have been suicidal in one case. He is paid to pull these women to pieces in public and accuses anyone not agreeing or being ‘woke’ or a snowflake’.

This infuriates me that someone with so much media influence spends their time attacking people who are vulnerable and who should have support.

I hope that in the not too distant future we won’t have to have these discussions about mental resilience, about how people are quitting on their team for being unwell, about how its an ‘excuse’. This is usually said by people that have no understanding of mental health issues and who do not understand the pressures of performing in public and being successful at that level.

With Naomi Osaka, she was fined for not attending a press conference and breaching her contract. If that isn’t discrimination, I don’t know what is.

This has to change. its 2021, not 1821!

I was heartened to see so much support for these women on social media and so I hope it is a small minority of views. But sport, a typically macho arena, needs to wake up, needs to support people and stop treating athletes in this way. This also echoes the workplace in general.

Solidarity with Simone, Naomi, Meghan and anyone else struggling. They are inspirations to people around the world with mental illness and together they will make a change.

How Selfie Changed my Life and Mental Health: by Photographer Kathryn Chapman


(image of Face to Face – a mental health photoshoot : Kathryn Chapman photography)

In my early twenties, after suffering years of severe depression and anxiety, I attempted suicide and ended up in hospital. Life was completely unbearable, ending my life felt like the only option. I existed in an excruciating, disassociated, confusing, numbed-out-tuned-in agony. Sometimes I’d feel incandescent rage and injustice, other times overwhelming sadness and often infinite emptiness.


I didn’t know who I was, I hated myself and my inner critic was rampant. I had no idea how to love myself or even what that meant. I embarked on 25 years in and out of talking therapy but achieved nothing and I was left drained, hopeless and utterly tired of talking.


In 2015 my mental health hit a massive low, I was knocked off my bike and the fragility of life hit me like a tonne of bricks. But it didn’t make me more positive, it made me more whats the point?


A subsequent psych assessment revealed clinical depression, severe anxiety and ‘off the scale’ PTSD. What was reflected back was a massive shock and once I’d got my head round it, promised I’d do things differently. My way. One thing at a time.


I started with my drinking and buried trauma began to surface. It was in this space I finally started to get a handle on what was going on –  it helped enormously but didn’t stop the cycle of depression and ferocity of my inner critic. But the mirror held up during the psych assessment had planted a seed.


A couple of years later, I had an idea for a self-portrait shoot. It persisted in my head for months before I realised it wouldn’t go away until I’d created it. It was a test – I wanted to see if everything was as bad as it felt, to hold up a mirror to myself, to look myself in the eye and face myself fully. So I sat with my most difficult emotions and photographed what was there.


I hadn’t thought about how I might react to the images, what I’d think, how I’d feel or what they might teach me. But there, looking back was a woman in agony, desperate for care and love, and the only person who could do that for her was me. It was a moving and very powerful moment.

Amongst the pain and hurt, I saw vulnerability, courage, resilience and strength – here I was, in all my beautiful mess. This was the first time that I saw and fully accepted myself, the first time I gifted myself kindness, patience and gentleness. I couldn’t deny what was staring back at me and I experienced a deep compassion for myself that has remained ever since.


It was the catalyst I needed to prioritise self-care and to feed my soul. I realigned with my spiritual needs and discovered a way to quieten my inner critic. I looked after myself holistically and it came easily, because not doing it wasn’t an option. The images had changed what I thought about myself, what I said to myself, what I saw in myself. It was transformative.


Six months later (after intending never, ever to share any of the images) I posted this picture. I got so much love and support, it was amazing. 


Not long after another surprising thing happened – I found my life purpose. I developed everything I’d discovered into a therapeutic programme and named it Face to Face®. I hold up a mirror so clients may see their own potential for lasting self-compassion and happiness, helping them come home to all that they are, to see they’re enough, they’re not to blame, that they matter.


To see themselves better.


Looking back, I realise that however close I came, I never gave up hope. I never gave up thinking there must be something or someone that would make the difference I needed. The something that made the most difference was my shoot and the someone that helped turn my most significant corner was me. I was my own light.
Our answers are within us, sometimes we just need someone to walk next to us for a while, to join us on our journey and reflect back our strength while we navigate the storms.


Keep searching, be your own priority. Trust who you are and what you need. And most of all have hope, because without hope we have nothing.


Kathryn is a portrait photographer, creator of Face to Face®, Freedom Shoots and the Inner Critic Tool. She is fascinated at how we perceive ourselves and uses therapeutic photography to challenge self-belief, offering a different perspective. She helps to understand what it means to be human – vulnerable, complex, creative, beautifully flawed, perfectly imperfect and astonishingly brave.


www.kathrynchapman.co.uk

@kathrychapmanphotography@facetofacephotos

The Book of Hope is Out Now!

I have written here before but I am so excited to say that the Book of Hope, which features my essay ‘Of Hope and Sunflowers’ and put together by my friends Jonny Benjamin MBE and Britt Pfluger is out now!

Happy Publication Day!


It is such an honour to be in a book with so many incredible people in their own fields talking about overcoming their own adversity and mental health issues.

As I write, the book is currently 16th in the bestsellers chart for all books on Amazon.

Hugely thankful to Jonny and Britt for including me in such a great project.

You can get your copy here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1509846379/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_3VAKJ0JC6HV05ZYMNHW2