Category: carer

Helping A Loved One Feel More At Ease In A Care Home.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 1 Comment

Making the decision for a loved one to enter a care home is never an easy one. You probably feel guilty for doing it, but the truth is that it will help them get the best possible care as they get older – more than you might be able to give yourself! There’s a lot of negativity about the subject, but many people find their quality of life improves in a care home, and there are things you can do to make that even better. Ultimately, it comes down to making a decision for their best interests, and even if it doesn’t feel that way at first, it soon will.

So what can you do to help them settle in? You can do your bit by finding ways to help them feel more at ease in their new surroundings. Here are some ideas to help your loved one adjust to life in a care home.

Image Credit: Unsplash under Creative Commons

Make their space feel more like their own

One of the biggest changes people face when going from their own home to a care home is the lack of personalisation and familiarity, and feeling like the space isn’t theirs. But there are things you can do to help fix that, including:

  • Decorate their room with things from their own home, including pictures, furniture, rugs, etc.
  • Choose from care home beds that they are happy with (if the home allows you to do this).
  • Add familiar fragrances.
  • Make sure they can indulge in their hobbies and interests with books, TVs, etc.

Talk to your loved one about what would help them settle in and do what you can to make it happen. 


Be there to make things more enjoyable

With your loved one receiving proper residential care, you can be there to help them have fun and stay active, something that might not have been possible while you were caring for them. Use your energy to take them out for trips, help them exercise, and spend quality time with loved ones. The Body Coach even has his own workout series for older people!

Being in a care home doesn’t mean your usual outings and activities have to stop, so you can help them keep up a routine that they enjoy.

Exercise is very important to help improve mobility and mood. Finding ways to help your loved one’s physical health can also benefit their mental health, improving their mood and helping them feel more at ease.


Get to know the staff 

There are a lot of reasons you should get to know the staff at a care home:

  • It can help you be more involved in your loved one’s life by getting to know the other people who are in it.
  • They’ll know more about you and your loved one, which can help them provide better care.
  • If you experience any issues, it’s good to have someone familiar you can talk to.
  • It creates more of a family atmosphere.

Regular visits and chatting with the staff more will help you make those connections, helping you feel more involved in your loved one’s care. It makes things nicer for them and for you, and is a fantastic way for you all to get to know people better. 

You will have all sorts of feelings about your loved one being in a care home, but it’s important that you focus on them and ensure they feel happy and comfortable where they are. Talk to them about what they want and how you can make it happen, helping them settle in quicker so you can both feel more at ease.

This article was written by a freelance writer.

How to Look After Yourself When You Care for a Loved One.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 2 Comments
(image: Pixabay)

If you are a carer for a loved one, or perhaps have a carer as someone with a long-term illness or chronic health condition, you will know that while it can be enjoyable and rewarding, it can be tough. Being able to take care of the needs of someone else, as well as yourself, can be a juggle, and often feel overwhelming. If you need some help and advice when it comes to caring for a loved one, then read on. As the old saying goes, you can’t fill from an empty cup, so looking after yourself is important as well.

Make each day different

It can be tough, but if you are caring for a loved one who isn’t very mobile and getting out of the house can be hard, then getting out and about can be the last thing on your mind for the day. However, having a change of scenery and keeping as active as possible is important for the mind in terms of dementia, as well as for their mental health. It can be a good thing for you as a carer too, as fresh air can make such a difference to how you feel too.

Think about routines

It can be easy to let the person you care for slip into your routine. This can be especially true if you don’t live in and just pop in each day at certain times. However, it is a good idea to think about the routine that is going to work best for those that you are caring for. It should help them to feel comfortable and at ease. This could look like not interrupting them when you know their favourite show is on TV or waiting to serve their meal at a better time, not just one that is more convenient for you. There needs to be a degree of flexibility with this, of course, but having a rethink of what you currently do is important.

Get the support that you need

Talking of routine and seeing what fits in with you as well as what fits in with others is important. However, there will be times when some things just won’t work; you can’t put everything that you need to do on hold. This is where getting help comes in. It may be that you just need another family member to step in for one day or perhaps you need to seek out the support of a carer support services team. It might be that you need physical help one day if you have an injury and lifting someone could make it worse. Look to create a circle of people around you that you can call on when needed and who you can trust and confide in.

Although the person you are caring for will come first most of the time, much like a relationship with a parent and child, you do still need to care for yourself. Putting plans in place that will make things easier for you, and give you any downtime that you need, is important.

This article was written by a freelance writer

The Flowers that bloom in Adversity: by Eleanor

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 5 Comments

mulan1

(image: Roxi Roxas Art)

I have wanted to write this post for several weeks, but so much has been going on personally and I have been really emotionally drained (and launching my new business too). Let start at the beginning.

At the end of May, my mother in law (who is carer for my father in law with terminal brain cancer) was taken very unwell. She was rushed to hospital with stroke like symptoms and put into an induced coma on a ventilator as her lungs were collapsing. We were super scared it was Covid as she was shielding anyway and it came completely out the blue, on the day of her 60th birthday after we had celebrated.

She is the main carer for my father in law and so my husband Rob had to move in to their house to care for his Dad and support his brother. (cue frantic phone calls to the doctors surgery, hospitals, Macmillan nurses and Jewish Care, all done by my incredible husband).

Thankfully, my MIL came off the ventilator to breathe unaided and she tested negative for Covid 19. We think she caught a severe bacterial infection and she then got pneumonia in her lungs. She was in hospital for 4 weeks and discharged 2 weeks ago and is making amazing progress with her physio team and her speech. She is still frail but she is recovering slowly.

This blog post I don’t want to make about my in laws because they are private people. Dealing with all these scary changes has been tough on my mental health (and everyones).

We are slowly slowly coming out the other side, although we know my FIL will worsen in time due to the nature of his illness.

So what flowers are blooming during this adversity?

-On Saturday will be our first wedding anniversary and we will spend it together. Its been a rollercoaster year but I am so thankful to have Rob by my side!

-I am loving my new Body Shop at Home business and my team and incredible managers. It really has been keeping me sane throughout this time of family lockdown and I can’t thank Sarah Cardwell enough for introducing me to the business. The products are so good for self care and healing too, which has been so needed and I have made lots of new friends. It keeps my mind stimulated and earns me income too- I am so grateful.

-Yesterday, Robs kind family member went over so we could spend some proper quality time together (thank you). We went for a walk in our favourite little village near by where there are cottages and flowers and village green and pond- I took lots of pictures of my dream cottages and gardens. Then, we got vanilla chocolate milkshakes (first time in a café post lockdown) and visited family. It was so special just to have US time, so rare in this current time for our family.

-This blog is continuing to grow and turning into a side business and for that I am ever grateful. I am also loving sharing peoples personal stories and hope it is a useful resource.

-Our guineapigs Midnight and Nutmeg are a source of joy and give great cuddles.

-Friends and familys kindness and messages help so much. I havnt had a therapy session in a while but will do.

I am feeling positive but there will be rough days ahead in the coming months. Today though, I am enjoying slightly more calm and peace again before the potential storm, and watching the flowers that are blooming in adversity.  

 

Hope with Eating Disorders (2nd Edition): Book by Lynn Crilly

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

HOPE WITH EDs - Instagram (2)

Writer of Hope with Eating Disorders : A Self Help Guide is Lynn Crilly, a trained counsellor and also a carer to her daughter who developed Anorexia and OCD at aged 13.

Conventional treatment didn’t help her daughter and so Lynn did all she could to learn about eating disorders and mental illness, in order to help her daughter recover. She trained in NLP techniques and became a counsellor, slowly assisting her daughter back to health.

Lynn has said,

‘I  have experienced and learnt first-hand how hard it is to support a loved-one through to recovery from Anorexia Nervosa and OCD, and the effect living with mental illness can have on not only the sufferer but everyone involved, particularly the rest of the family.

I was keen to go on to give others the benefit and support of my knowledge and experience both personally and as a counsellor. Over the years I have had the privilege of working with some wonderful people and their families, each and every one unique, whilst I have been able to support them through their journeys. I too have learnt from them.’

I found the book very easy to read and incredibly informative. The first edition of Hope with Eating Disorders was published in 2012. Since that time, awareness of eating disorders have grown. Lynns website says about the book,

In this second edition, which maintains Lynn Crilly’s warm, non-judgemental, family-friendly approach, the more recently recognised eating disorders have been included, the range of treatment options – both mainstream and alternative – has been fully reviewed and revised, and the impact of social and technological change has been fully accommodated, with the role of social media for good and ill to the fore. New case histories highlight key issues, and throughout all references to research and stats have been reviewed and updated. Men’s eating disorders are now addressed by contributing author Dr Russell Delderfield. Since originally writing Hope with Eating Disorders, Lynn has experienced seven years of counselling practice and seven years of her own daughter’s recovery from an eating disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, underpinning her realistic insight into what recovery actually is and means.

Hope with Eating Disorders is a practical, supportive guide for anyone helping someone with an eating disorder be they a family member, teacher, sports coach, workplace colleague or friend.

You can find out more about Lynn and buy a copy of her book at www.lynncrilly.com/my-books