If you havn’t heard of the bestselling book ‘The Let Them Theory’ by Mel Robbins, I urge you to grab a copy or watch Mel’s videos on Youtube. This book teaches you how to take back your emotional power. Say you break up with someone who doesn’t see your worth or you get excluded from social arrangements from your friend group, or you have a difficult relationship with a parent or sibling…. this book teaches you how to live the best and happiest life for you, without causing terrible emotional impact to others and yourself.
This blog is not an advert for the book. I havnt been paid to read and review. I just found it personally so helpful and life changing for me. I am an empath, I am sensitive and I take peoples actions to heart. I am slowly learning to choose me and look after what I can control and not worry so much about others behaviour or people pleasing. Not easy when you want to be kind and you also have anxiety- but boundaries are so important. Building your own self confidence and protecting yourself is key too.
Mel Robbins says,
“The moment you say “Let Them,” you stop giving your power away. And when you say “Let Me,” you take it back and start living life for you—your dreams, your peace, your values.
This quote is from page 106 of The Let Them Theory. It’s a powerful reminder to stop chasing approval and start choosing yourself.”
Mental health is an essential part of overall well-being, yet it is often overlooked until symptoms become overwhelming. Millions of people around the world live with mental health conditions that can affect their mood, thoughts, and behavior. These challenges can interfere with relationships, work, and daily routines, but the good news is that treatment options are more accessible and effective today than ever before.
When individuals understand their condition and seek the right support, they can build healthier coping strategies and regain control of their lives. Two common struggles people face are bipolar disorder and anxiety—both of which can be complicated further when substance use is involved. Exploring recovery options designed specifically for these conditions can open the door to long-term healing.
The Importance of Addressing Mental Health Early
Early recognition of mental health symptoms is critical. Too often, individuals dismiss mood swings, prolonged sadness, excessive worry, or fatigue as “just stress” or “a bad week.” However, these patterns can signal a deeper issue that requires professional support. Addressing mental health concerns at the onset not only improves outcomes but can also prevent the development of secondary challenges such as addiction, chronic stress, or physical health problems.
By taking proactive steps, individuals are more likely to develop resilience and maintain stability over time. Family members, friends, and colleagues also play an important role by offering encouragement and understanding instead of judgment or stigma.
Understanding Bipolar Disorder
Bipolar disorder is one of the most misunderstood mental health conditions. Characterized by extreme shifts in mood, energy, and activity levels, it goes far beyond the typical ups and downs that people experience in daily life. Those with bipolar disorder may experience manic or hypomanic episodes—periods of high energy, impulsivity, and elevated mood—followed by depressive episodes that bring sadness, hopelessness, or loss of interest in activities.
Because bipolar disorder exists on a spectrum, its symptoms vary greatly from person to person. This makes individualized care essential. Professional intervention, therapy, and medical management can significantly reduce the intensity and frequency of mood episodes, allowing individuals to lead fulfilling and balanced lives.
For those seeking guidance, comprehensiveBipolar Disorder Treatment programs provide structured support that combines psychotherapy, medication management, and lifestyle strategies to stabilize mood patterns. These programs focus on helping individuals better understand their triggers, strengthen coping mechanisms, and create long-term wellness plans.
The Overlap Between Mental Health and Substance Use
Mental health conditions often coexist with substance use disorders. This dual challenge, known as co-occurring disorders, can complicate both diagnosis and treatment. For example, individuals with bipolar disorder may use drugs or alcohol during manic episodes to maintain their energy or during depressive episodes to numb emotional pain. Similarly, those with anxiety might turn to substances as a form of temporary relief, leading to dependency over time.
The presence of co-occurring disorders makes it critical to find treatment centers that specialize in dual diagnosis. Traditional approaches that treat mental health and substance use separately may fail to address the underlying causes of each condition, resulting in relapse or incomplete recovery. Integrated treatment programs, on the other hand, provide a holistic approach that tackles both issues simultaneously, improving long-term outcomes.
Anxiety and Its Connection to Addiction
Anxiety disorders are among the most common mental health conditions worldwide. They can manifest as generalized anxiety, panic attacks, social anxiety, or phobias. For many, constant worry and fear interfere with work performance, social interactions, and even physical health.
When anxiety is left untreated, individuals often look for ways to escape their symptoms. Unfortunately, this can lead to reliance on alcohol, prescription medications, or illicit substances. While these may provide short-term relief, they create long-term consequences and increase the risk of developing addiction.
To break this cycle, specializedanxiety and addiction treatment programs are designed to address both issues together. These programs typically combine evidence-based therapies such as cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), mindfulness practices, and medical support to help individuals identify the root causes of their anxiety while also treating their substance use.
(image: Sydney Rae: Unsplash)
Building a Strong Support System
Professional treatment is only one piece of the recovery puzzle. Having a strong support network can make a tremendous difference in maintaining long-term wellness. Family therapy, peer support groups, and community-based programs help individuals stay accountable while fostering connections that reduce isolation.
Loved ones can also benefit from education and counseling, as understanding mental health conditions makes it easier to provide the right kind of support. Encouraging open conversations about mental health challenges helps break down stigma and creates an environment where healing is possible.
Healthy Lifestyle and Daily Habits
Lifestyle changes play a critical role in managing conditions like bipolar disorder and anxiety. Regular exercise, balanced nutrition, adequate sleep, and mindfulness practices can all reduce symptom severity. For example, yoga and meditation help regulate stress, while consistent sleep patterns can stabilize mood swings.
Journaling, creative activities, and spending time in nature are additional strategies that promote mental clarity and emotional balance. While these habits may not replace professional care, they work in tandem with treatment to strengthen resilience.
Long-Term Recovery and Hope
Recovery is not a one-time event—it’s an ongoing process that requires commitment, patience, and self-compassion. Relapses or setbacks may occur, but they don’t mean failure. Instead, they can serve as opportunities to re-evaluate strategies and adjust treatment plans.
The growing availability of specialized programs for conditions like bipolar disorder and anxiety shows that no one has to face these challenges alone. With proper care, individuals can achieve stability, rebuild relationships, and pursue meaningful goals.
Final Thoughts
Mental health conditions such as bipolar disorder and anxiety can feel overwhelming, especially when compounded by substance use. However, effective treatment and recovery programs provide hope and healing. By seeking out resources tailored to specific needs, individuals can find balance and create a foundation for lasting well-being. It is important to be lead by a psychiatrist about medication and treatment when someone also has substance abuse.
No matter how challenging the journey may seem, recovery is always possible. Support, understanding, and professional guidance are the keys to moving forward and embracing a healthier, more fulfilling future.
More than one million people (including myself) are living with bipolar in the UK and, despite the summer meaning excitement and positivity for most, for many living with bipolar this is not always the case.
Common challenges in summer can impact people living with the condition- including high temperatures which can interfere with certain medications (including Lithium and anti psychotics or anti depressants), the longer daylight hours which can disrupt mood stability, and travelling which can sometimes trigger symptoms.
There are ways to manage seasonal challenges, and Bipolar UK is now sharing its top tips to help people navigate the summer months!
Top tips for navigating the next few summer months if you have bipolar from Bipolar UK:
Sleep
Maintaining a regular sleep routine is an important way to support mood stability. Lighter nights can make it more difficult to switch off and wind down; and early sunrises can cause disruptions to sleep. Blackout curtains or an eye mask might help.
Heat
Hot weather can affect both physical and mental wellbeing. Certain medications used to treat bipolar can make it harder for the body to regulate its own temperature, leading to overheating. Staying cool, drinking plenty of water and staying out of the sun during the hottest parts of the day can help reduce the risk of overheating and becoming dehydrated. Rest is important so communicate with friends and family about how you’re feeling and if you need to rearrange plans.
Travel
Be mindful when travelling to different time zones. Jetlag can have an impact on bipolar symptoms. Try to make time to sleep and rest whilst on the plane and when you arrive so you can acclimatise. Set a reminder on your phone of when you need to take your medication so you can stick to your schedule.
Sensitivity
Some bipolar medications can increase sensitivity to sunlight so protecting your skin with a high factor suncream when outside is important, as well as seeking shade when possible. Continue to take your medication as prescribed but do speak to your medical professional if you have any concerns.
Socialising
There are often more social activities during the summer, with people wanting to make the most of the better weather. If it all feels too much, learn to say “no” and preserve your energy. Pick and choose which activities you’d like to do, but don’t feel obliged to do them all.
Routine
Longer days can lead to changes in routine which can trigger shifts in mood. Some people with bipolar feel their mood can shift more easily into hypomania and mania during the summer months, whereas others notice their mood dips into depression. Noticing the signs early and speaking to your mental health team, family or other support network can ensure you get help when you need it and potentially avoid a relapse.
A dual diagnosis occurs when an individual simultaneously struggles with a mental health disorder and a substance use disorder. Far more common than many realise, dual diagnoses can involve combinations such as depression and alcohol dependence, anxiety and benzodiazepine misuse, bipolar disorder coupled with stimulant abuse, or PTSD alongside opioid addiction. Attempting to treat one condition in isolation while neglecting the other typically leads to inadequate results and higher relapse rates. Dual-diagnosis care addresses both issues in tandem, recognising the complex interplay between mental health and addiction. Below, we explore five essential components of an effective, integrated treatment approach that fosters sustainable recovery.
Understanding the Link Between Mental Health and Addiction
Self-medication is a common pathway to substance misuse: someone experiencing chronic anxiety may reach for alcohol to calm racing thoughts, while an individual with untreated depression might use opioids to numb emotional pain. Unfortunately, what begins as short-term relief often worsens underlying psychiatric symptoms. Alcohol, for example, disrupts sleep and brain chemistry, intensifying anxiety or depression over time. Conversely, the guilt, shame, and isolation that emerge from addiction can spark or aggravate mood disorders.
Recognising this bidirectional relationship is critical in dual-diagnosis care. Clinicians assess not only which substance came first, but also how each condition fuels the other. By identifying triggers—whether social stressors, traumatic memories, or genetic vulnerabilities—therapists can help patients develop healthier coping strategies. Early psychoeducation enables individuals to see how their mental health and addiction are intertwined, fostering motivation to engage in comprehensive treatment.
Comprehensive Assessments for Accurate Diagnosis
Misdiagnosis is rampant in dual-diagnosis cases: withdrawal symptoms can mask depression, and manic episodes may be mistaken for cocaine highs. To avoid these pitfalls, providers conduct thorough biopsychosocial evaluations that delve into psychiatric history, substance use patterns, family dynamics, medical background, and co-occurring health issues. Standardised screening tools—such as the PHQ-9 for depression, GAD-7 for anxiety, CAGE for alcohol misuse, and the Addiction Severity Index—offer structured insights that guide diagnostic clarity.
Laboratory tests and, when indicated, neuroimaging can reveal medical complications—like liver dysfunction in heavy drinkers or neurochemical imbalances in long-term stimulant users. Ongoing assessments throughout treatment help clinicians monitor progress, adjust medication, and refine therapy goals. An accurate, layered diagnosis ensures that neither the mental health disorder nor the addiction is minimized, laying the groundwork for a cohesive care plan.
The Role of Integrated Treatment Plans
Unlike traditional models that silo psychiatric care and addiction treatment, integrated plans bring multidisciplinary teams together. Psychiatrists, addiction medicine specialists, psychologists, social workers, and certified peer support counsellors collaborate on a unified treatment blueprint. Core elements may include:
Medication management to stabilise mood disorders and reduce cravings (for instance, SSRIs for depression and buprenorphine for opioid dependency)
Evidence-based psychotherapies such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and trauma-focused interventions for PTSD
Group therapy sessions that address both substance use behaviours and coping skills for anxiety or mood regulation
Family therapy and psychoeducation to repair relationships and build a supportive home environment
Holistic modalities—mindfulness training, yoga, nutritional counseling—aimed at restoring overall well-being
Coordinated care prevents mixed messages and redundant treatments. When each provider shares a common set of goals and progress metrics, patients receive consistent guidance, and their support network remains informed and engaged.
(image: Alysha Rosly, Unsplash)
Flexible Care Through Programs Like the Intensive Outpatient Program
Not everyone with a dual diagnosis needs round-the-clock residential care. For those with strong support systems, manageable symptom severity, and stable living conditions, outpatient solutions can strike the right balance. A reputable intensive outpatient treatment program offers structured therapy multiple times per week, while allowing individuals to live at home and maintain work or family responsibilities.
These programs typically include group counselling, individual therapy, psychiatric check-ins, and relapse prevention workshops. They serve as a transitional step either before entering less intensive outpatient care or following discharge from an inpatient facility. Flexible scheduling and a mix of virtual and in-person sessions accommodate diverse lifestyles, enabling more people to access high-quality dual-diagnosis treatment without uprooting their lives. In the UK, these were known as ADTU units attached to hospitals, but there are less of these on the NHS.
The Importance of Ongoing Support and Aftercare
Recovery from a dual diagnosis doesn’t end when formal treatment ends. Long-term success hinges on robust aftercare and relapse prevention strategies that recognize recovery as a lifelong process. Essential components of sustained support include:
Peer support groups—such as Dual Recovery Anonymous or integrated 12-step fellowships—that offer lived-experience encouragement
Regular outpatient counselling or case management to address emerging challenges and adjust treatment plans
Medication-assisted maintenance, when appropriate, to stabilise chronic mental health conditions and prevent relapse
Life-skills workshops for stress management, financial planning, and vocational training to strengthen daily functioning
Digital tools and telehealth check-ins that enhance accessibility, especially for those in remote areas
Family involvement remains vital: ongoing family therapy sessions and education empower loved ones to recognize early warning signs and respond effectively. Community resources—like sober living homes and recreational recovery programs—further enrich social support, reducing isolation and reinforcing positive lifestyle choices.
Conclusion
Effective dual-diagnosis care transcends the simplistic view of treating mental illness and addiction separately. By acknowledging their deep interconnection, clinicians can offer comprehensive assessments, integrated treatment plans, flexible program options, and enduring aftercare. Whether delivered through residential facilities or outpatient settings, these five components—link recognition, accurate diagnosis, collaborative treatment, adaptable program structures, and sustained support—equip individuals with the skills and stability needed for lasting recovery. Embracing a holistic, patient-centered approach that addresses the whole person, not just isolated symptoms, paves the way for renewed health, purpose, and hope.
This article was written by Elizabeth (Lizzie) Howard, writer and contains a sponsored link.
Self care is so important, so why not try a Magnesium Bath? Magnesium baths rely upon magnesium salts (typically magnesium sulfate or magnesium chloride) dissolved in warm water to create a solution with beneficial qualities. Magnesium ions are absorbed through the skin during your soak through a physical process called transdermal absorption, which relaxes muscles by balancing nerve impulses to muscles, and it also reduces inflammation. Magnesium is also beneficial in the production of cell energy as it helps in the production of ATP and enhances the quality of sleep, due to the control of melatonin release. Here we present five evidence-based ways magnesium baths support physical recovery, skin health, mental clarity,
Deep Absorption of Minerals in Warm Baths to Revitalise Muscles
By soaking in warm water with magnesium bath flakes, you’ll be getting a concentrated dose of this vital mineral that will be absorbed directly into the skin. Magnesium ions penetrate the skin through the flakes, entering the muscles when they disrupt pain transmission and minimise the markers of inflammation. This is selective absorption and initiates recovery of active stress, therefore, heals stiffness as well as increases flexibility. The sources of tensions dissolve, and your previously tensed muscles turn into elastic cords capable of moving in any direction. Habitual soaks enhance soothing properties, so, you can live an active life, without muscle soreness.
Enhancing Mental Clarity with Sensory-Rich Immersion
Warm water helps lighten the burden of daily challenges, and magnesium gratefully taps into neurotransmitters like GABA and tones the impartiality of moods. With every deep breath of subtly scented extra essential oils or plant infusions, every breath is gets a little stronger, until you can relax deeply. You become able to go back into your environment, and you can go and do things in a purposeful manner. Recharging of the mind roots you throughout the day in a state of productivity.
Lifting the Home Spa Atmosphere
More than minerals and water are required to turn a typical bathroom into a sanctuary. You can use soft towels, controllable lights, and adornments that create an atmosphere that welcomes relaxation. Include small-scale candles on the periphery of the tub with flames that provide soft illumination. The slightest bit of greenery helps bring nature inside for relaxation.
Gentle Agents to Boost Skin Health with Nourishment
In addition to relaxing the muscles, a magnesium bath helps to give the skin a glow. The mineral helps to hydrate and repair the cells due to its ability to attract moisture to the epidermal layer. During soaking, scrub a bit with a side brush or natural sponge to scrub off dull cells, and in turn, boost circulation. Pat dry and trap moisture by using a light natural oil or serum, and the skin will absorb the nutrients. As time progresses, you will feel that your skin has become smooth already and has a healthy glow that is a result of constant renewal with the help of minerals, so your skin will feel refreshed too.
Retraining to Have Restful Sleeping Routines
Magnesium soaks in the evenings, prepare you to take a lovely, restorative sleep with the help of balancing various hormones that control your circadian rhythm. The temperature reduction when exiting the bath into cool air is an indication to your body that you should take a rest and relax. You will sleep more comfortably, more deeply, with less anxiety and you should end up waking up in a good mood.
Magnesium baths are refreshing and also spiritually enhancing. Muscles relax, minds can be more focused, skin becomes radiant, and sleep comes as easily as breathing. This habit goes beyond relaxation and becomes a specific gesture of care taken towards yourself, one that re-echoes in all the levels of your life. By doing that, every bath will become the ritual of rejuvenation, a special moment created especially in your favour where the stress of the day is washed away and health prevails.
This article was written by Miranda Spears and contains some sponsored links.
If you’re reading this, you likely know what it’s like to care deeply for others – whether as a nurse, paramedic, therapist, social worker, or in one of the many roles that keep our communities going. But here’s something we don’t say out loud enough: caring for others can quietly take its toll on our own wellbeing, especially when it comes to health anxiety.
The Hidden Weight of Health Anxiety in Caring Professions
Caring professionals are often assumed to be unshakeable in a crisis – the calm in the storm, the voice of reason when others are spiralling. But what happens when your own mind starts to race? When a fleeting ache becomes a late-night Google search, and that spirals into a restless night? Or when the stories you hear at work bleed into fears about your own health or loved ones?
Health anxiety isn’t “just worrying” or “hypochondria.” It’s a very real, common challenge for those who look after others. NHS surveys found 76% of staff experienced a mental health issue last year, with over half reporting anxiety. We absorb others’ pain and witness uncertainty, sometimes internalising that anxiety until it shapes our own thoughts and behaviours.
Why Caring Professionals Are Prone to Health Anxiety
Caring roles put us face-to-face with illness, unpredictability, and loss. We’re trained to scan for problems – a strength that can turn inward, fuelling cycles of health anxiety. Many of us are also experts at minimising our own needs. My clients (and yes, I’ve been there myself) often struggle to switch off “helper mode” and create space for their own wellbeing. No wonder health anxiety can creep in.
Recognising the Signs
Health anxiety can show up in subtle – and not-so-subtle – ways:
– Excessive checking: Monitoring your body for symptoms, repeatedly seeking reassurance, or going down “Dr Google” rabbit holes. – Preoccupation: Struggling to focus on anything but health worries, even outside work. – Avoidance: Steering clear of situations or tasks for fear of illness. – Physical symptoms: Real sensations (like palpitations, headaches, or stomach issues) that reinforce anxious thoughts. – Sleep disturbance: Lying awake, unable to switch off your mind.
My Integrative Approach: You’re Not Alone
As a therapist specialising in anxiety, stress, and burnout among caring professionals, I understand the unique pressures you face – not just as a therapist, but as someone who’s walked in your shoes. At Ardolino Counselling, my approach combines: – CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy): We map the cycle of anxious thoughts and behaviours, learning practical ways to break free from unhelpful patterns. CBT helps you question catastrophic thinking and gently test healthier beliefs. – ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy): We work on making space for uncertainty, learning to “unhook” from distressing thoughts, and focusing on what really matters – without trying to eliminate anxiety altogether. – Person-centred therapy: All our work is grounded in compassion, empathy, and respect for your unique story and strengths.
It’s not about “fixing” you – it’s about working together so you can keep doing the work you care about, without being overwhelmed.
Image: Unsplash: Tim Mossholder)
Practical Tips: Coping Day-to-Day
1. Challenge Catastrophic Thinking When a health worry pops up, pause and ask: “What’s the evidence for this thought? Am I assuming the worst?” Label these as “catastrophic thoughts,” and consider: “What’s a more balanced or likely explanation?” Notice how believable the new thought feels and how you might behave differently if you believed it.
2. Ground Yourself in the Present When anxiety spirals, try grounding techniques like box breathing or the “5-4-3-2-1” exercise: name five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste. This anchors you in the here and now.
3. Limit Reassurance and ‘Dr Google’ Notice when you’re seeking reassurance – asking colleagues, Googling symptoms, or scanning your body. Set gentle limits on these habits, reminding yourself: “Uncertainty is uncomfortable, but I can handle it.” Reducing reassurance-seeking helps break the anxiety cycle.
4. Set Boundaries to Protect Your Energy Give yourself permission to say no, or to step back from work worries outside your shift. Small routines – like a walk after work or a tech-free hour – help reinforce this boundary and support your wellbeing. 5. Reach Out for Support If anxiety persists, talking things through with a trusted friend, colleague, or therapist can give you perspective and relief. You don’t have to manage it alone.
When to Reach Out
Everyone experiences worry sometimes. But it’s worth seeking help if:
– Health anxiety is interfering with your work, relationships, or daily life. – You’re finding it hard to “switch off,” even away from work. – You’re avoiding situations or tasks because of health fears. – Your anxiety is getting worse, not better, over time.
Mental health struggles are common and nothing to be ashamed of. Reaching out isn’t a sign of weakness – it’s a step towards regaining balance and resilience. Many caring professionals find that talking to someone outside their immediate work circle helps them process fears and develop healthier ways of coping.
Ready for Real Change?
If health anxiety is making it harder to do the job you love, you deserve support tailored to you as a caring professional. At Ardolino Counselling, I offer a free, no-pressure 15-minute consultation to see if therapy feels right for you. Sessions are available UK-wide (online or in Barry, South Wales) with flexible scheduling, including Fridays, evenings, and weekends.
Special Blue Light Card Offer: Blue Light Card holders receive 50% off their first 8 sessions. Block bookings are also available for added savings.
You give so much care and skill to others. Let’s make sure you get the same support in return.
Let’s admit it- there are days when you just don’t feel like yourself, and even saying that does not quite capture it. It’s as if your body is here, but your mind has wandered off somewhere far away. Everything feels out of sync-your thoughts, your feelings, your surroundings- there’s a disconnect. You might find yourself overthinking, your nervous system overstimulated, reacting in ways even you can’t predict. The chaos of it all makes you feel heavy. Your mind races, your emotions spiral, and your body? Exhausted. Everything feels too much. That’s what being ungrounded feels like.
We often hear about “finding your center.” But what does that really mean? It’s more than just a calming Pinterest quote. It refers to that deep, stable place within you, where you feel aligned with yourself-emotionally, mentally and spiritually. A place where your nervous system isn’t constantly fighting or fleeing, but finally resting. Your center is the part of you that remains unchanged amidst this chaos. It’s your home. And grounding is how you find your way back.
Getting Grounded
Grounding is a technique to return to your body and the space around you. It involves activating your senses, engaging with the physical world and gently reminding yourself that- I am here. I am now. I am okay. It doesn’t have to be something extremely fancy. Sometimes, just placing your bare feet on the grass can calm your system. Your body knows. It’s just waiting for you to listen.
One of the most helpful strategies is the ‘5-4-3-2-1 method’. It’s simple- you just look around and name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell and one thing you can taste.It might seem too simple to work, but it has helped people bring them back to themselves in powerful ways. A girl once shared how this technique helped her come out of an anxiety attack. She was disassociating, feeling far from herself, until this grounding practice slowly brought her back.
Your body holds wisdom. Even something as basic as conscious breathing can help regulate your nervous system. When your breath becomes deep and slow, it sends a signal to your brain: “You’re safe now.” This is where Dr. Stephen Porges’ Polyvagal Theory comes in. It explains how activating the parasympathetic nervous system through breath, movement, cold water, or even humming can bring your body out of stress mode and into a state of calm. Grounding, in this sense, is not just emotional-it’s biological. You’re not just calming your mind, you’re regulating your entire being.
There’s a reason we feel so held when we touch water or soil or walk barefoot. Our bodies remember their connection with the Earth. A study from The Journal of Environmental and Public Health even found that simply placing your body in direct contact with the Earth can regulate the autonomic nervous system and reduce inflammation. It’s nature, simply doing what it’s always known how to do-grounding us in the most quiet and comforting way.
Slow Down
In a world that has always pushed us to do more and be more, simply slowing down and being present can feel rebellious. But it’s necessary! You cannot really pour anything from an empty cup. You cannot create anything from chaos. You cannot heal while running. You need to come back to yourself.
And let’s not pretend it’s easy. Finding your center is not a one time thing. You lose it, often. Especially if you have trauma, anxiety or even neurodivergent experiences like ADHD. Your nervous system may be more sensitive. That doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. It just means you need tools to return-again and again.
Return To Your Inner Child
The journey of grounding is also the journey of returning to your inner child. That version of you that existed before the noise, before the pressure, before the need to prove anything. Children live in the present. They are fully in their bodies, unfiltered in their expression, and completely immersed in the now. Maybe the healing is not in becoming something new, but in remembering who you were before the world told you who you had to be.
You don’t have to fix yourself. You’re not broken. The goal isn’t perfection. It’s presence. It’s feeling at home in your own skin, even when the world feels unsteady. Sometimes you just need to sit still. To let the storm pass. To breathe like you’re filling your spine with stillness. To exhale like you’re letting go of static.
This moment, right here, is all you truly have. So ground yourself. Look around. Breathe. You’re not late. You’re not lost. You’re just coming home.
About the Author – Bhavya Jain:
Bhavya is an I/O Psychologist and Integrative Psychotherapist committed to promoting positive mental health and breaking the stigma around therapy. She spearheaded a year-long pro bono initiative offering free mental health services, partnering with schools and nonprofits to make support accessible to underserved communities. Through her work, Bhavya continues to advocate for inclusive, unconventional approaches to mental well-being.
For those of you who have read my blogs or book, you will know that I have lived with mental health issues since I was young (diagnosed with bipolar at 16, depression and anxiety at 15 and lots of anxiety as a younger child).
My bipolar is medicated so that my brain functions fairly ‘typically’ ie i don’t get mania or severe depression, but I do get bad anxiety and milder depression.
What started as a teen to protect me from harm, became a full fledged panic disorder and social anxiety. Hiding away became my way to protect myself from the world, from people’s negative judgements, from life.
Even now at 36, I navigate a lot of the same anxious thoughts, behaviours and feelings. I don’t often share this part of my life anymore but I feel it is essential.
Yesterday, after having a particularly bad patch with anxiety where I cancelled many arrangements, stayed inside a lot etc, I spoke to my wonderful therapist because I needed to unpack what was going on for me.
In the course of the discussion about the different issues going on for me that could be causing the social anxiety/agoraphobia element I realised this key truth.
I have built metaphorical walls around myself in many parts of my life (my body, my friendships, my relationships in general), to keep myself safe from trauma I have faced. Part of that comes out as social anxiety as a protection mechanism and there’s time when that worsens. And times when its better.
But what I did realise is this.
I would like to feel properly alive and start taking down some of the walls, so I can live. Sometimes, the walls keep me safe and cosy. Sometimes they are not serving me anymore. I also want to boost my self esteem so that I stop retreating and hiding, or if it happens as it will, to find a way to work with it. I have had EMDR before so it may be returning to that for a while to unpick the knots!
I am very much a work in progress and so, I know I will always live with some level of anxiety. It is about how I learn to live well despite life’s challenges.
Do you find you put up walls or have social anxiety too?
I am sharing because it is therapeutic but I was even anxious sharing this as its so personal.
Thanks so much to Anuj and all at Feedspot for listing us at number 2 in the 20 Best Social Anxiety Blogs on the internet! A true honour to be listed amongst some wonderful blogs.
Exciting times! Thank you so much to my fellow mental health blogger Mandy Kloppers at Thoughts of Life and Love blog for hosting my blog on why I wrote Arabella and the Worry Cloud– to help children with anxiety. I know Shelley illustrated it for the same reason. I had so many worries as a child and young adult- I definitely had my own Worry Cloud!
When I was a little girl and well into my teen years and beyond, I had a lot of anxieties. As a self-confessed empath and worrier, I could feel when something was wrong. This led to separation anxiety with symptoms including nausea at school. Children who have anxiety need to feel safe, settled and above all, heard by parents/carers and the adults in their life at school.
I wrote my first children’s picture book, Arabella and the Worry Cloud, in 2019 and published it last year. It is based on me as a young 7-year-old girl who had a lot of anxiety. In the book, Arabella worries about her socks not fitting on her feet, losing her shoes in a muddy puddle, the rain soaking her and cold freezing her toes, the rainbow in the sky losing its colour, her cat Pickles getting lost, the plants in the garden dying, losing her homework, failing a test and being blown away by the wind. These worries are partly represented by a Worry Cloud that comes down to see her from the sky and threatens to rain on her with all her worries.
Eventually, Arabella realises that if she thinks jolly, happy, sunny thoughts in place of the worries, she can push the Worry Cloud away with the joyous light beams of positive thinking. Arabella unlocks happy memories with her family, visualising wonderful times with them and it gives her confidence to face the Worry Cloud head on, so it can go away and leave her in peace.
So many children will have their own version of the Worry Cloud.
(image: Shelley the Artist/ E Segall)
Read the full blog here about how my experiences informed me writing Arabella and how it can help you:
beurownlight.com 