Month: November 2016

Surviving mental illness while practising Judaism

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 4 Comments

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This post is being dedicated to my friend Helen Brown who wanted to know how being an Orthodox Jewish woman works and is compatible with having a mental illness. How supportive were the Jewish community when I was ill and what does Judaism mean to me?

So:

Let me start by saying that I was born into Judaism and raised Jewish, in a Modern Orthodox, United Synagogue Household- meaning I keep Kosher, rest on the Sabbath and observe all the festivals, learn and pray when I can. I also practise ‘tzniut’- dressing modestly and endeavour to live my life with the positive values of the Torah (Old Testament) bridging modern society .  I have a great love for and appreciation of Judaism and I have found that it has kept me going through many difficult times.

Prayer in particular has had a very important resonance in my story. When I was ill in hospital with a bipolar episode two years ago, my friend brought me a tehillim prayer book- the Book of Psalms. Another friend brought me a book of strengthening hopeful quotes from Rabbi Nachman. Every day, I prayed to God to release me from my illness, to give me strength and to give me a full and complete recovery. I prayed that the Doctors and nurses would support and help me, and they did. I found freedom through my religion, even if I couldn’t always understand why this particular test was in my life. My friends also lit candles on the Sabbath with a prayer that I would get better and prayed for me.

The support from the Jewish community during this time was incredible. Rabbis visited me with warm chicken soup, cakes, wisdom, advice and prayers. Friends and family rallied round to visit and bring me food, soft toys, cards and themselves. The kindness was immense and never will be forgotten.

However, there is still a stigma against mental illness in the Jewish community, as there is in most other communities.  When I first became ill at 16, I was ridiculed my many who did not understand the meaning of a bipolar manic episode. To this day, I believe there is a woeful misunderstanding and knowledge of psychosis- delusions or hallucinations. There is also a stigma when looking for a marriage partner, if using a matchmaker. I was taught by many to keep quiet about my illness and I still do not readily give the information unless it will help someone else.

Not everyone understands medication or psychotherapy and I am on a mission to educate everyone so the stigma can fall. I am a Modern Orthodox Jewish woman.  This means I love God and want to live by His laws, whilst enjoying the modern world of theatre, books, cinema and culture too.

I believe that I was ill for a reason, whether its brain chemistry, a test or both. What I do know is that the community now is changing- there is much more support and kindness.

We only have to look at the new Jami (Jewish Association of Mental Illness) Head Room Café (a social enterprise cafe raising money for the charity) to see that. The funding and support Jami is getting and its new prominence.

There is still more to do, but we as Jews (and non Jews) have a duty to support anyone who is ill- whether its in the mind or the body.

Guest Post: Inner Self Talk The 7 Words that hold you back

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

Michael J. Russ- Author and Adversity Coach
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Your inner conversation, also known as self-talk, exerts more influence over your attitude, achievement, time, success, happiness, relationships, and overall prosperity than you can imagine. Self-talk is best defined as the thoughts and words you use to describe you and what you are doing.

Regardless of whether your inner dialogue remains in your head or is expressed in conversation, there are seven words that can hold you back. These words are: hard, difficult, tough, impossible, can’t, try and never, and usually make an appearance when referencing current and future actions, especially those related to adversity.

Why should you stop using these seven words? Aside from focusing on the negative, they generate unnecessary additional mental adversity and sow seeds of doubt that prevent you from fully committing.

Do you occasionally find yourself saying, this is going to be hard, it’s tough for me, or I will never finish this? Is there some rule that says something will be hard, tough or difficult, or that you will never get something done?

Have you ever heard a coach tell their team a game will be tough, difficult or impossible to win? Of course, not. A coach would never plant such a thought virus into the heads of their players.

When you approach tasks, goals, and intentions, use self-talk that affirms and supports what you want to happen, instead of what you do not. Thinking and saying, I can do this, is a great example of affirmative self-talk that opens pathways to producing your best effort. The phrase is simple, yet very empowering!

Right about now, you are probably wondering what I suggest you think and say in place of the seven words I recommend you drop from your self-talk vocabulary. In my view, simply referring to a response or future action as a challenge is more appropriate because it does not generate additional mental adversity. Examples of its use would be, cleaning this garage is going to be a real challenge or my health is my greatest challenge. These statements position you for what you must accomplish on the road ahead—igniting strength, will, creativity, and inspiration, as opposed to mountains of negative feelings and emotions that hold you back.

Framing actions as challenges might seem trivial, ridiculous, or even uncomfortable at first. What you will soon experience, however, is a noticeable difference in the way you
think and feel. Viewing actions as challenges sets the stage for mental clarity, optimism, possibility thinking, inspired actions, and miraculous aha moments.

Establishing clear goals and intentions and then crafting an inner conversation that supports them is crucial to making self-talk your most important resource and greatest ally for achievement and designing the life you envision. If you find it too great a challenge to keep the seven words I mentioned unsaid, remember this sage advice, if you can’t say something positive, don’t say anything at all.

About the author:
Michael J. Russ is an international bestselling author, inspiring speaker/trainer, and the founder of Zero AdversityTM Coaching & Training. This article was adapted from his international bestselling book, Zero Adversity: 3 Practical Steps to Freedom, Fulfillment, and Creating an Authentic Life, where he outlines a practical 3-step method everyone can use to experience balance, freedom, and prosperity in their life. Michael can be reached via email at inquiry@michaeljruss.com. http://www.michaeljruss.com

Guest Post by Richie: Dealing with anxiety, Live Your Now

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 4 Comments

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(image:weheartit.com)

I was honoured to be asked to write a piece on anxiety for this wonderful blog.  I’m Richie, and I’m a mindfulness coach – one who happens to have had anxiety for as long as I can remember.  The thing is, I didn’t always know I had it.  I’ve been researching positive psychology methods etc for many years, but I wasn’t coping so headed to see a counsellor who referred me for a course of CBT after having pointed out – Sir, you have bad anxiety.

Me?

Yes I’d had panic attacks, people would describe me as quite reactive, amongst other things – and after all these years, to discover it was my “fight or flight” mechanism going into overdrive & attaching to situations in had no business being in, well, I was not impressed to say the least! How did I miss this? I felt initially extremely put out by this, I saw myself as a “fighter” – I got on with things, my panic attacks were just “stage fright” (I was in radio/music performance etc), my OCD a quirk of creativity and all that jazz! Right?

Wrong.

This is when I began to understand more fully the stigma associated to “mental health”. A somewhat wishy-washy term to people not familiar, or plain ignorant of the facts (as I myself was), as it’s often attributed to needing to just “chill out” or, “stop being so depressed” etc. At some point in life, many people will experience bouts of some kind of mental illness – after traumas, disappointments, or for some no seeming reason at all! But then, even the most healthy people can catch a cold.  And that’s the issue. Mental Health is a physical issue, that cannot be seen, and therefore for some is like trying to see oxygen.

My advice is simple on this matter; for brevity.

Acceptance & ownership

Firstly, accept it’s a physical thing, and take ownership and understand the physical things in the mind that are taking place. This helps separate you from the thought that you ARE your anxiety/depression etc. This is simply not the case.

If you catch a cold, you don’t say you ARE your cold. CBT helped me understand the mechanics of it, and have useful approaches, but for me (and we’re all different), I find mindfulness to have been the most helpful because it teaches to not identify as “being” depression/anxiety etc. This begins a process of dissociation of identifying as “being” depressed/anxious, and instead acceptance of what it is, how it functions, learning how it feels, and gradually gaining a level of understanding and feeling of when it’s occurring – and how it can shape/affect our feelings/emotions and therefore behaviours/reactions.

Experiment with techniques

Secondly, experiment with ways that can help you day to day – of course, seek professional help, but there’s also much that you can do independently. Breathing exercises (massively effective!), reminding yourself that the depression/anxiety doesn’t make you who you are, try things like mindfulness which teach us to detach from thought.

I also personally use meditations, guided or technological, hypnosis, even things like “EFT” (emotional freedom technique – or tapping), reading positive books, listening to uplifting music, and actively managing thought processes as and when I can.  Using mindfulness to compliment allows for being more in touch then, with which techniques are being more effective for you in the moment.

Is anxiety still there? Oh yes! But the more I practice these techniques (and you will find what works for you) and indeed, share them with others, the more aware I become of “anxiety”.

Reframing

Lastly; I have also reframed my anxiety, because without that fight or flight mechanism, our species would not likely still be here! So it’s important! It’s evolved in our species to protect us – and there are times that flood of adrenaline etc is critical. We certainly would not wish to be without it, but the chances a tiger is going to jump out and eat us are hopefully not too prevalent in your neighbourhood…

My experiences prompted me to begin @LiveYourNow & @Rmindrs on Twitter where I post daily mindfulness reminders, engage, and encourage others to talk – and hopefully create a few laughs too! (Laughter releases great neuro-chemicals!)

Be forgiving of yourself, understand you’re on a journey, and when you find things that help you, share them with others. The more we speak openly, the less stigma is attached, and the more others who may be suffering in silence may feel comforted and confident to speak out and seek assistance.  I have been witness to that now multiple times, and it’s truly a wonderful thing when we accompany each other, in compassion, on our healing journeys.

Thank you for reading! I hope it brings even just one person comfort/hope.

To your greatest life,

Richie – @LiveYourNow

My Blogging Journey: An Update

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 4 Comments

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All has been so busy here at Be Ur Own Light of late that I havn’t often had time to sit down and just breathe and be. I started this blog back in March time as a personal journal and a way for me to speak to friends and family about my struggles with bipolar and anxiety.

Since then, it has been read on almost every continent excluding the Poles (thank you), gained a larger following here on WordPress and on social media and led me to collaborate with a variety of mental health writers and bloggers, campaigners, charities and  health campaigns.

From there, I have also started blogging for the Huffington Post Lifestyle under my real name and am hoping to collaborate with many others. My dream would be to have a feature in Glamour UK Magazine, Stella Magazine or Grazia. I hope that by putting it out to the universe that this will happen!

I would also like to write my own Mental health book and memoir and become a published author and raise more money for charities.

Thank you so much for reading and being a part of my writing journey. Thank you for your likes, follows, comments, guest posts and Tweets/ Insta messages. Thank you for reading from your corner of the world.

I hope to make Be Ur Own Light a big magazine style blog, reaching as many people as possible. For now though, I am humbled by the love and support I have received so far. If you want to collaborate with me just email beurownlight@gmail.com or Tweet me. 

With gratitude and love x

Article for the Monologues Project- ‘People don’t always understand’

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

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Be Ur Own Light has teamed up with the amazing Monologues Project for this months #showandtell feature. In it they interviewed us about our journey with mental health and asked questions about our lives.

It is such a pleasure to be working with them. Thank you Monologues Project!

To read the in depth article, click here: http://www.themonologuesproject.org/features/003

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Guest Post: How Deepdene Care helps support people with psychosis.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

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by Rhona Mackenzie, Clinical Director, Deepdene Care

For more please clink link above or see http://www.deepdenecare.org.uk/

Be Ur Own Light is happy to partner with Deepdene Care,a health provider in the UK


At Deepdene  we support people with severe mental health issues such as psychosis.

 

As mental health problems are often complex and involve an array of factors, the best course of action for any case is structured, multi-faceted approach that is rolled out over months and possibly years with the primary objective of reducing the impact of the condition on an individual’s life.

 

As a service provider we have to look at the bigger picture:

 

Staff have a deeper understanding

A high level of staff training is an intrinsic part of any treatment and care plan.

 

We train staff to understand and increase their knowledge of all mental health conditions. In the case of psychosis, they are taught to be aware of what hallucinations and delusions are, so that they can act in a proper, effective manner, and are also taught how brain chemicals can affect people. This gives them an educated insight, which not only helps with treatment, but allows them to understand what an individual is going through, ensuring empathetic responses.

 

In addition, staff have to have an understanding of the side effects of medication. So, again, they are properly equipped to be able to help the service users and approach them with understanding.

 

Therapies and activities

Therapies and activities are also a key factor in the recovery process, especially occupational therapies, where service users are able to fill their time with meaningful activities. This helps individuals gain routine in their lives, bringing a sense of direction back into what they do and acting as a representation of everyday life.

 

Getting to know the person and their symptoms 

It is essential that anyone with psychosis under our care is supported and treated as an individual, as each case is completely different from another and symptoms can vary quite dramatically. This is why we place a great deal of focus on listening to patients, observing their behaviours and supporting them in every way possible.

 

We also promote therapeutic relationships between staff and service users, with the central goal being to build trust and respect among them.

 

Destigmatising mental illness

As a mental health provider, we have to advocate and educate people to destigmatise mental illnesses and accept the person the way they are – promoting empathy among team members and throughout the service as a whole.

 

If a person has had a mental illness they are usually more understanding and empathetic towards another mental health sufferer. If a service user/person is being discriminated against, we may need to support them on how to deal with that.

 

Outside support

We also support those with psychosis through outside professionals like psychologists.

 

But, and we can’t stress this enough, none of our work would be effective, if we don’t support, respect and accept the individual for the way they are.

 

Mental Health Recovery

Our ultimate goal is to have individuals be responsible for their own behaviours, which is why we look to educate them to self-support their own physical, emotional and social needs, while we are on hand to offer support when necessary. Almost like a safety net to cushion any falls individuals may have on their personal journey to recovery.

 

It’s important to dispose of any one-size-fits-all solution. This is about treating the person as an individual, accepting their illness as part of their individuality while at the same time seeing them as a whole person and not just defining them by their mental health condition.

 

Self-belief is a huge part of the recovery process and we’re able to help individuals develop their esteem, empowering them by educating them on relationships, finance, occupation, choices, diet, exercise and lifestyle. Placing control back into their own hands through guidance and advice.

 

It’s important to understand individuals so that we know when they are at their best, at which point we can work with them to develop crisis and relapse plans and find out exactly how they’d like to be treated. Essentially it’s a two-way street, and we place a great deal of importance on working with individuals to find the best path.

 

 

A Journey through Psychosis.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 4 Comments

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Trigger warning: discussion of psychosis and acute mental health. 

Psychosis is something that I have experienced but havn’t ever fully written about as it can be quite a confusing, painful and scary subject

However,  today I had some time to write a blog about it and thought I would share my experiences to educate others and raise awareness.

What is psychosis?

Psychosis takes many forms- its when your brain goes into a heightened  psychotic state- meaning you could start believing things that aren’t real (delusions), hearing voices or seeing hallucinations, talking to yourself, being convinced you are in grave danger- about to be attacked or killed for example (linked to delusional beliefs). Along side psychosis you may also get what is known as ‘grandiose’ beliefs. This means that you believe you can do absolutely anything or that you have super powers/ can run the world/are a religious saviour, for example.

What is important to note is that every human with psychosis is an individual with unique brain chemistry and so not everyone will present in the same way or have the same symptoms. Furthermore, you may be diagnosed with an illness such as bipolar affective disorder, schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder which can trigger your unique symptoms or alternatively, psychosis can be brought on by drug use such as ‘skunk’ (a potent form of cannabis) or other hard drugs.

How can we treat psychosis?

Its likely that if your  symptoms are really bad you will be encouraged to  go into hospital so you can be treated under a psychiatrist and given anti psychotic medications. These medications (some older and some new drugs) work to stop the heightened thoughts, delusions, voices etc….. and slowly bring you down from the psychotic state.

This is even more important if psychosis was brought about by drug use, to be in an environment where you cannot take drugs. Furthermore, If you have a diagnosed illness or a suspected illness, the care you will receive in hospital by mental health nurses and psychiatric team is generally good and you will be monitored and watched.

I experienced bad psychosis in 2014 during a bipolar manic episode. While I never heard voices or saw hallucinations, I had very bad delusions about the world and was extremely fearful. I thought that I had been kidnapped and was being watched in hospital by a gang (including the nurses). This eased over time as I was given Haloperidol and tranquilisers to slowly bring me down over a few months by a medical team. Thankfully the medication expertly worked on my brain and I was monitored carefully.

I have written this to say- you can survive psychosis and go back to a relatively normal life. Everyone is an individual so this isn’t the same for everyone, especially if you have addictions. For me though as someone with bipolar disorder controlled on medication, I have been able to get back to a happier and normal, stable life. 

Guest post by Joshua: Tips and Advice on getting through Bipolar

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

Trigger warning: discussion of suicidal thoughts.

For more from Joshua please email: rebuildrepaircredit@gmail.com

Hello! My name is Joshua, I am one of seven.  1 in 7 people have bipolar disorder. I have noticed that mental disorders are often overlooked or misunderstood. So here I am, stepping up to talk about it in the open.

I would not be here today to write this if had I not gone through my bipolar epiisodes and become stronger. I will not lie and say I have conquered it fully, but I am able to tame the beast . So, I hope I can help you. Are you struggling with any mental disorder? I love you and know you can fight it. It will not be easy, but you can do it.

The devastating effects of bipolar depression aka the main problem

First, a topic frequently avoided is suicidal thoughts.

Have you ever felt suicidal? I sure have.  I wanted to die so badly at such a young age. I broke down crying on the floor after I almost attempted to. Welcome to severe bipolar depression. A very difficult thing to cope with.


Do you still feel suicidal?

Honestly, I think everyone has these feelings. But bipolar and depressed people feel them seep into their hearts and minds much stronger. Suicidal thoughts are a nasty beast, attacking people at their weakest. Mental illness can break even the strongest people- if you are going through it right now, you are so strong!

 

Do you still feel this way today?

So to answer your question honestly, I do still have thoughts sometimes. Will I ever end my life ? No! I will promise you all that today. Promise me today that you will never do it as well. Stay with us, hang in there, please.  You must fight with everything, to live. You are a wonderful person and you deserve to live as long as possible! So am I! Fight with me!

 

One in seven? That is a lot of people! Do I know any people with bipolar disorder?

Chances are very high that you know someone dealing with bipolar. Lots of famous people are affected today and also in the past.

‘Never, never, never give up’. – Winston Churchill. I have a poster that I like with a frog being eaten by a pelican. Except the frog is choking out the pelican and not allowing himself to be eaten! Be the frog. So, never ever give up. To succeed in life this is demanded.
My favourite quote is ‘If you’re going through hell, keep going.’ – Winston Churchill

Fight on and continue!

 

When did you realize you had bipolar disorder?

First, from an early age, I realised I was different. Not in a bad way, but unique. I would say around 7-9 years old, I was already in counselling.  7-9 years old was one of my worst times for sure and I started experiencing bad symptoms aged 13. Mental disorders often begin in puberty due to hormonal changes. Hormones plus bipolar do not mix well. Controlling emotion is a big part of conquering bipolar.


Do you take medicines now? They work well for some. Do they help you?

I have tried many different medications. My team tried their best to see what would work with my body chemistry. Yet, there was a big problem. Every single medication had terrible side effects. The killer for me was the massive migraines.

During high school, trying to function felt downright impossible! I was so depressed I could not get up in the morning.  The medications I tried were challenging for me and didn’t always agree with my body.

 

Tell me a little more about you. What makes up the mind of a person with bipolar disorder?

I am far from perfect, but on a great path. So I am not here to brag. Everyone is intelligent in their own ways. I have always been intelligent as well. So my point is that you should do your best to not let this hold you back. It does not have to be a disadvantage. Also, many people with bipolar are highly intelligent.

I have always loved people. So I always try to see the best in them.  I am a triple full-time dad and entrepreneur.  I have started multiple successful businesses. Currently, I run websites. RebuildRepairCredit.com is a free credit repair clinic I started. Every single day I better myself. Now I try to better the world around me every day as well. You too can do the same. Improving yourself is the best investment you can make.

 

What else is difficult when you have bipolar disorder?

There are manic times. More recently I have learned to harness these gifts. However, if you are not careful these gifts, they can be challenging.. They were most of my life. Manic episodes can leave you awake for days or weeks and longer! Have you ever been awake that long? Sleep deprivation is torture. Be kind to these people! As I said before I have been awake nearly a month straight with 5-minute naps. This was a manic episode worsened by the wrong medication. Antidepressant only without mood-stabilisers can do this! Finally, in manic periods someone with bipolar may do things they would not normally do.

Final tips and advice on getting through bipolar

First, be sure to seek professional help when needed.  These can be lifesavers. Sometimes a professional ear can break down an issue and make it easier to deal with. Keep your chin up! So you will break, you will fall. This does not mean you have failed! Also, you are stronger than your weakest moment. So recover, stronger each time. Fight back!

To conclude, if you or  someone you know  has bipolar disorder,  be kind.  Nobody really knows the struggles another is facing. You may feel broken. Know you are loved and can overcome this. It will take time and lots of effort, but it is worth it. Finally, know you can still lead a full and productive life. Fight past your disabilities whatever they are. Because you are more powerful than your minor shortcomings.

 

A blog for Bipolar UK- ‘What bipolar means to me’

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

I am excited to share with you all my first blog for the charity Bipolar UK. Bipolar UK assist those with bipolar disorder and their families, as well as raising awareness.

In this very personal blog, I share what it is like when suffering with a depressive and anxious episode. I hope you enjoy reading it and it helps you feel a little less alone!

‘The other day I was sitting in my room feeling contemplative and I found one of my journal notebooks from 2011. I’ve been journalling on and off since I was young and have documented a lot of my life as it’s so therapeutic.

In 2004 I was diagnosed with bipolar at the age of just 16. I’m now 28 and have spent the past 12 years managing my illness through medication, therapy and a good support network….’

Click here to read the full article:

https://www.bipolaruk.org/blog/what-having-bipolar-means-for-me

Mondays and an exciting announcement.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

Hi to all of my loyal readers,

I hope you had a fantastic weekend, or even just a good weekend. I went to the theatre last night to see the hip hop musical ‘In the Heights’ for the third time! I love the show and it was wonderful. I had a relaxing weekend too and spent time with family.

Am very excited to announce that I am now blogging on the Huffington Post UK website, on a freelance basis. This is all incredibly amazing and I am thrilled to be able to share my mental health knowledge. As this blog is anonymous, I can’t tell you my real name however if you read the Huff Post, you may see some blogs from me.

Thank you all for reading, liking and sharing my posts.

Have a wonderful day. #beurownlight