Category: Anxiety

Does Retail Therapy Help your Mental Health?

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 4 Comments

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

We all have been through it or at least heard about the term ‘retail therapy’ before. To many, retail therapy is the act of shopping to relieve stress. It is a coping mechanism that can be used to deal with emotional issues.

A study by the University of British Columbia found that people who shopped when they were feeling sad or angry were more likely to feel better afterward. Shopping may be a way for people to temporarily forget about problems and focus on something else. For many, getting over a bad day could be as easy as going to the online shop adidas offers or visiting your local retail store. 

Retail Therapy does not work for everyone, and some may find it counterproductive because it can lead to feelings of guilt and shame after spending money on items that are not needed or wanted. So, what benefits can we get from retail therapy, and is it something that can work for you?

What are the Benefits of Shopping as Therapy?

Shopping is a great way to improve mental health. It can be a form of physical and emotional therapy. Shopping in store can be a form of physical therapy as it allows people to get up, walk around and explore new places.

 It also provides an opportunity to take care of oneself by indulging in self-care. Shopping can be an emotional therapy as it allows people to express themselves through buying things they want or need, while getting rid of the things they don’t want or need anymore.

Relaxation

There are many ways to improve your mental health. Many people choose retail therapy as a way to relieve their stress and improve their mood. Retail therapy is an effective way to unwind because it helps people to change the focus of their thoughts from negative thoughts, such as worry or anger, towards positive thoughts, such as excitement or anticipation.

Sleep Improvement

It is important to note that retail therapy has been shown to have positive effects on mental health, but it should not be used as a replacement for professional help. There are different types of sleep deprivation, and insomnia is one of them.

 Sleep deprivation can lead to mood swings, irritability, trouble concentrating, and more serious problems like obesity or diabetes. In a similar way, Insomnia can lead to depression or anxiety disorders, which can lead to other problems such as substance abuse or an eating disorder.

Improved Mood and Happiness

There are many reasons why retail therapy can help you improve your mood. One of them is that it makes you feel like you have accomplished something, which boosts your self-esteem. Another reason is that retail therapy is seen as self-care and an easy way to distract yourself from negative thoughts or feelings. 

Self Control 

Retail therapy provides you with a sense of control and relief. You can use it to distract yourself from your negative thoughts and feelings. While retail therapy is not always a good idea, it can be helpful in some situations. For example, if you are feeling frustrated or lonely, retail therapy might provide you with the joy and excitement that you need to feel better about yourself. It’s important to remember that the benefits of retail therapy are temporary and that this technique should be approached with care.

Disadvantages of Retail Therapy

While there are many advantages and benefits to retail therapy, there are many ways that it could have a negative effect on you. So, it’s essential to remember that retail therapy is not for everyone. It has been proven to be helpful for people who have depression and anxiety, but it also has its downsides. People who have a shopping addiction can find themselves in a difficult situation when they feel the need to buy something new every time they are feeling down or sad.

The person will not be able to control their shopping habits because of their addiction and wants the feeling of gratification from buying something new. They may also buy things impulsively without thinking about what they need or even if they have the money for it. When this happens, the person might start making poor financial decisions which could lead them into debt or bankruptcy.

It’s important that you lookout for signs of shopping addiction while taking part in retail therapy. 

Signs of Shopping Addiction

Shopping addiction is a serious problem that is becoming more and more common. It can lead to numerous mental health issues, such as anxiety, depression, and stress. It’s important to be able to tell the difference between the occasional shopping spree and a full-blown addiction. Signs of shopping addiction include:

  •  Spending too much money on clothes or other items for yourself or others
  • Having difficulty controlling your spending
  • Spending hours at a time looking for things to buy
  • Feeling guilty or ashamed after shopping
  • Putting off, paying bills, saving money, or doing other important tasks in order to spend money on things you don’t need

Once you find yourself showing signs of your addiction, it is important to get help because it can lead to mental health issues. It can also lead to a lack of self-control, which in turn can lead to other problems.

Knowing When To Getting Help

So, to answer the question: Can retail therapy help with your mental health? The answer is yes, but that yes comes with a warning beside it.  

While retail therapy can be great for helping your mental health. It’s important for you to remember that everything should be taken in moderation. Retail therapy is great for helping you to get over a bad day today. However, when it starts to have a negative effect on your mental health instead of helping, it’s time for you to get professional help.

Don’t ever spend more than you have and if you find that you are regularly. support is available for you. You are not alone.  


This article was written by a freelance writer and contains affiliate links.

Starting The Conversation: 5 Tips On How To Talk To Your Boss About Your Mental Health

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 11 Comments

Image by Andrea Piacquadio via Pexels

According to new data from Mental Health Statistics, during 2020, 58% of workers experienced some kind of work-related stress, while 63% were experiencing moderate levels of anxiety. 

Health experts have warned, that if these mental health issues are left untreated, it can impact our day-to-day lives, including the ability to do our jobs. 

That’s why the team of experts at Delamere, have shared five ways to open up the conversation about mental health with your employer: 

  1. Find the Right Time and Place to Talk  

When approaching the conversation of mental health with your employer, one thing that will help is finding the right time to talk. Talking to your boss on a day when they seem overwhelmed might result in you not getting the best response, so make sure to schedule a call or an in-person conversation with them ahead of time.

As well as the right time, it’s also important to find an appropriate place to have the conversation. Find a place that will allow you to talk in a professional and calm way, and is a quiet space in your workplace. If somewhere suitable isn’t available you could also suggest meeting outside the office or even going for a walk. 

  1. Plan what you are going to say ahead of your meeting

Before speaking to your manager one of the best ways you can prepare is by planning what you want to discuss ahead of time. This will not only calm any nerves you might be having ahead of the conversation but will also ensure that you are only sharing what is needed to frame how your mental health is impacting your work.

Points you can prepare in advance could include, identifying tasks within your current role and workload that is making you stressed, reminding your boss of your achievements so that they remember you are more than capable, explaining what factors might need to change in order to help you.

  1. Decide Who To Speak To 

If you decide to open up to your employer about your mental health, consider who you will feel most comfortable having the conversation with. 

If you have a good relationship with one of your managers, it might be helpful talking to them about what you are going through. However, if you find that they aren’t very approachable, consider speaking to someone within your HR department that will be able to help you.

  1. Consider That Your Boss May be More Receptive Than You Think

Though talking about your mental health with your employer may feel like an uncomfortable situation, they may actually be more understanding than you anticipate them to be. 

Mental illness is very common illness and a lot of people, unfortunately, suffer from this in the workplace. So when you start the conversation, the chances are your boss or employer will have already had direct experience with dealing with it or even experienced it themselves. 

  1. Focus on Your Productivity and Ability to Work

To get the most out of your conversation with your employer, think beforehand about how your mental health is impacting your productivity and ability to work.

If you go into the meeting with this already prepared, the chances are you will have greater success coming up with solutions on how your employer can support you and what you need to get better. Whether it’s more flexible working hours or a lighter workload.

This article was written by Delamere residential addiction care.

She is Messy, But She’s kind. Performance of ‘She Used to be Mine’ Sara Bareilles by Nicolina Bozzo on American Idol 2022.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 9 Comments

To anyone that needs a song to inspire them, pick them up, that they can relate to.. see this beautiful performance by Nicolina Bozzo, an American idol contestant, covering the Sara Bareilles song She Used to be Mine.

This gives me goosebumps as it builds.. the lyrics are beautiful but Nicolina puts even more emotion into it…

She’s imperfect but she tries

She is good but she lies

She is hard on herself

She is broken and won’t ask for help

She is messy but she’s kind

She is lonely most of the time

She is all of this mixed up

And baked in a beautiful pie

She is gone but she used to be mine

……..

For the girl that I knew

Who be reckless just enough

Who can hurt but

Who learns how to toughen up when she’s bruised

And gets used by a man who can’t love

And then she’ll get stuck and be scared

Of the life that’s inside her

Growing stronger each day

‘Til it finally reminds her

To fight just a little

To bring back the fire in her eyes

That’s been gone but it used to be mine

Remember you are a survivor and you can do anything you want in life. Thank you Nicolina for this performance.

How To Stay Motivated At Times When You are Feeling Lost by Tracie Johnson

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 3 Comments
(image: T. Johnson)

Life is uncertain. Even in the best of times, something unexpected can happen. You may have a hard time getting out of bed or putting one foot in front of the other each day.

It can be a challenge to find the motivation to keep moving forward when you feel stuck or don’t know which way to turn. Don’t give up hope. You just need help finding your way.

You are Not Alone

Many people have faced struggles similar to yours, yet when you look at others around you, they may pretend everything is going well. Nothing could be further from the truth. Everyone has some sort of obstacle or bump in the road. However, we have been taught to hide our feelings. We avoid asking for help. Once you understand that others are involved in a struggle like yours, it will help you to feel like you are part of a community.

You are Stronger than You Realise

You may be under the misconception that you are ‘too weak’ to take on the world. Start looking for your strengths. Sit down with a piece of paper and jot down anything positive you can think of about yourself. List your achievements. Think of problems you have resolved in the past. Ask people you trust about the best things about you.

You can boost your confidence when you focus on what you can do instead of what you can’t. Focusing on your strengths may give you a sense of direction and shift your mindset.

A Helping Hand Can Make a World of Difference

Sometimes it simply takes new eyes to find the best part of you. You may be so caught up in all of your obligations that you’ve lost sight of who you want to be. You are probably like so many others who have sacrificed their own interests in order to take care of others. You may want to seek guidance or spiritual life coaching from helpful resources who can help you see yourself in a new light. 

It’s time to stop letting the rest of the world get in the way of your pursuit of happiness. Discovering the gems hidden inside of you can light the way to a brighter future as you realise your full potential.

Focus on What You Can Control in Your Life

While it’s true that there are many outside influences that are completely beyond your control, you can take charge of more than you realise. Don’t limit yourself with boundaries that have been established by others. Find your way to climb your mountains. Use the tools you have that will help you to open doors in your life. Don’t dwell on anything that has already happened. You can’t go back to the past.

Don’t let yourself get stuck in the mud of the problems of today. Tackle one small problem at a time. Don’t let your thoughts hinge on what will happen tomorrow. Stay in the present moment and celebrate your victories.

Work on Being the Best You Every Day

You’re going to make mistakes. The most important thing you can do is learn from them. If there is something that went wrong in the past, try to make a positive choice now. Wake up every morning determined to be better than you were before. Make a list of goals for the day. If you don’t achieve all of them, bump them to tomorrow. You’ll always have something to keep you going when you have more items on your to-do list. However, don’t pressure yourself and pace yourself.

Final Thoughts

You are a unique, remarkable individual. There is no one else like you on the planet. Celebrate your special qualities. Remember how important you are in the grand scheme of things. Choose something to shoot for, goalwise, on a daily basis. It will give you a reason to wake up every morning.

Think about something good in your life instead of the negative. Take two steps forward. Even if you slide back one, you are still headed the right way. Explore new opportunities. You never know when something will spark a new interest. It could pave the way to who you were always meant to be.


This article was written by writer Tracie Johnson, based in the USA.

5 Risk Factors For Post Partum Depression.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Fat Camera via Unsplash).

During the 2020 COVID season, UK health experts stated that new mothers were twice likely to experience postpartum depression. The report further stated that women with babies younger than six months were the most at risk of developing this mental health condition.

While 47.5% of women may seem on the high side, it is a reality some people have faced in their motherhood experience. While science is still at a loss for the exact cause of postpartum depression, the medical fraternity believes risk factors exist.

  1. Stress associated with new baby care

Without a doubt, baby care is a demanding responsibility. It can take a toll on your physical, emotional and mental wellbeing. Unfortunately, women who are unable to properly manage all these three elements may increase their risks of post partum depression. Feeding, diaper/nappy changes, and constant monitoring can take all your time.

This is why experienced parents believe it is necessary to adopt certain measures to ensure you do not push yourself to the backburner. One of these measures is to sleep when your baby naps. So, how long does it take to sleep train your baby? This question is an issue many new parents struggle with as they streamline their babies’ sleeping patterns.

  1. Preexisting mental health condition

Usually, a female with a preexisting mental health condition is believed to be at a higher risk of postpartum depression. Psychologists believe that the issue of brain chemical imbalances may significantly influence a person’s vulnerability. While the discussion on postnatal and postpartum depression continues to rage on, you may find it helpful to know the subtle difference. Postnatal depression is usually the mental health condition associated with a woman’s depressive mood in the first six weeks after birth. However, postpartum depression (PPD) refers to the period exceeding that.

According to a mayoclinic.org study, women with bipolar conditions may have a higher risk of PPD. Individuals in this category experience more depressive symptoms if the condition is left unmanaged. Additionally, a person with a history of Schizophrenia or Bipolar, may also have an increased chance of experiencing postpartum depression. Usually, women without a prior diagnosis of any preexisting mental health condition can have difficulty understanding why they have PPD.

  1. Family history 

A 2019 report by postpartumdepression.org claims a possible genetic and hereditary disposition to PPD. Although some medical circles believe the findings are inconclusive, there is a strong belief that this mental health condition can run in families. For example, if your mother experienced postpartum depression in her reproductive years, you may have inherited genes that put you at a higher risk. Indeed, this is not the kind of news people want to hear, but it is vital to be armed with this crucial piece of information.

It is worth noting that since specific genes run within biological families, the discussion of genetically inherited PPD cannot be a mere claim. PPD researchers claim that certain genetic alterations during pregnancy could indicate whether a woman would experience postpartum depression. Additionally, these researchers believe that the chances of it happening to a first-time mother may be higher than another who has had multiple births.

  1. A drastic change in image perceptions 

In many instances, women experience weight gain and other image alterations during pregnancy and after childbirth. While some women can bounce back to their former selves within weeks of birth, most take longer. For the latter group, the drastic change in physical appearance can affect their self-confidence and self-esteem. Unfortunately, the inability to embrace these physical body changes could contribute to postpartum depression.

A preemptive measure may be to embrace the fact that a changed appearance is a part of the pregnancy and childbirth journey. If you find that too hard to believe, you may find it helpful to be patient in the ‘waiting period.’ This is the phase when women’s bodies gradually return to the pre-pregnant state. If you can psych yourself up in this period, you can reduce your chances of developing an image-induced PPD.

  1. Absence of social support after birth

Contrary to public perception, single mothers are not the most at risk of absent support. Undoubtedly, the absence of a partner may double up the burden of baby care. However, this issue cuts across both divides. Whether you have a partner or not, the absence of a support group from family or friends can increase your risk of postpartum depression.

Post partum depression can be a difficult struggle, but it is one that can be overcome with support. Reach for help from your doctor or psychiatrist, friends and family and support groups/ other mums too. You may decide to take anti depressants or engage in therapy to help. There are also helplines and charities out there to help new mums with mental health issues, including PPD. You are not alone!


This article was written by a freelance writer and contains affiliate links.

Your Guide To Being Debt Free And With Good Mental Health in 2022

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment
(image: Unsplash)

There is a strong correlation between debt and mental health which is often overlooked. According to the Royal College of Psychiatrists, 1 out of 2 adults with debts, also struggle from mental health and therefore it is something that certainly should be discussed more openly.

Not only can people with mental health such as anxiety or depression face difficulty with managing finances, but parallely, those with debt can often suffer anxiety or depression as a consequence. 

Debt can start with basic credit cards or types of personal loans and get out of control due to shopping online, gambling or by being unable to keep up by losing your job or form of income.

With 1 out of 10 Britons suffering with debt problems, circa 6 million people, it is something that we need to be more conscious about and today we offer some useful guidance and support to be debt free and have good mental health for 2022.

Speak To Your Creditors

The stress of having debt starts with the letters demanding payments and it is remarkable how such a small piece of paper can cause so much stress and anxiety. Also just the feeling of having debt in itself is a painful and uncomfortable feeling.

But one of the worst things you can do is avoid any communication with the creditor. In fact, just speaking to the creditor or company that you owe money to, can ease things. There are always options available to you if you are struggling to pay back a credit card or you are behind on a loan.

For instance, credit card companies can offer you a minimum payment, which is 10% of the balance and you can recur this each month until you want to pay in full. The fees for doing so are very, very small and there is just a tiny negative impact to your credit score – but it offers huge breathing space.

For lenders, they are likely going to be able to freeze interest, delay payment for several weeks and months or spread your repayments over a longer period of time, via something called an arrangement to pay. So whilst you will still owe the repayment, it will certainly help by being able to delay repayment until you can get back on your feet.

And just having some repayment schedule in place can stop any calls, texts or letters coming through the door and take some stress off your shoulders. 

(image: Unsplash: Towfiqu Barbhuiya).

Speak To a Professional 

If you are struggling with debt and are unsure where to turn, consider speaking to a debt professional. Not only are there lots of forums online, but there are charities who will answer you and help you for free, such as StepChange and Citizens Advice Bureau. These establishments will be very used to the types of debts and problems that you are having and they will know very quickly the best ways to calm things down and help limit any further fees and charges being applied.

Speak to Your Family and Friends

Whilst many people are too embarrassed to speak to their close circle of friends and family about their debt or their mental health, you will find enormous strength and support from the loved ones around you.

If you have some debts to pay off, you may find that borrowing money from family and friends can be a simple way to elevate this. It is common for parents to help with any debt problems and not request any interest back. You should always be planning on paying your family back though, because this is always healthy for a relationship. But certainly if you have lost your job and just need some breathing space, this can always be a viable option for you.

Don’t Be Shy to Ask For Help

Being strong in times of mental health or financial problems can sometimes add even greater stress, by just having to hold everything in or still be required to attend birthdays, pay for gifts or go to restaurants with people you love.

But being open and honest with the loved ones around you, can be one step closer to helping with your current problems and getting back on your feet.

Just Realise That Everything is Temporary

You might feel like your debt is taking over, but in reality, it may only be temporary. After all, debt is something that can be wiped out once you have repaid or part repaid.

You may want to avoid selling important things in your life, such as your house and your car, but do not be surprised how much junk is lying around the house that people are willing to pay money for. Whether it is books, CDs, DVDs or clothes, there are people on various apps, Facebook Marketplace or even car boot sales who are interested in buying these things and you could quickly gather a few hundred pounds in very little time.

You will be surprised how quickly you can get your debt sorted – and one step closer to financial freedom and better mental health.



This article was written by a freelance writer and contains links.

Mental Health Chat With Penny Power OBE and Thomas Power of Business Is Personal with Myself and my Dad Mike Segall. Our Journey With Bipolar Disorder and Anxiety.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment


Yesterday, 9th Feb, my dad Mike and I were honoured to be interviewed by his friends of many years, Penny Power OBE and Thomas Power of Business is Personal- live on Linkedin, Youtube and Facebook.

They asked us to come on their weekly show to talk about our hereditary journey with bipolar disorder and anxiety and shed light on all things mental health.

It was a real pleasure to talk all about our lives and how my Dad was diagnosed with bipolar just 4 years before me.

Trigger warning: discusses suicidal ideation and psychosis.

Thanks Penny and Thomas! We hope it battles stigma around this much misunderstood illness. Watch here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fghp8RNTvX0

Jami Charity See Mental Health Campaign: 36 Hours to Raise £1 Million

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 2 Comments

(image: Jami)

My dad Mike and I have been fundraising in the past day for a cause which is close to our heart. Jami mental health charity serves our community, the Jewish community here in the UK and beyond.

We have been asking people to donate to Jami’s match funded campaign to raise £1 million to support existing services and also to pilot a new service for secondary school age children. Referrals during the pandemic have risen and mental health support is much needed for under 18’s too.

We are fundraising because we ourselves have been affected by mental health (bipolar disorder) in our family. I was diagnosed at just 16 and had good NHS care in hospital but at the time, there was little support in the Jewish community available for me as a child. Mike was diagnosed at 44, a few years before me, and was thankfully helped to recovery.

We are both great supporters of Jami’s work (I am a Jami volunteer and we have both spoken at the mental health shabbat) and we believe this service will be vital for caring for secondary school children. Services are stretched and children are put on long waiting lists.. this is where Jami would come in to support a child and their family.

Today,, the campaign hit over its £1 million pound target and it is just incredible to see our community funding (badly needed) mental health support ! Its been wonderful to play a small part in this campaign- we have hit over £2000 of funding on our page!

This is so very close to our hearts due to our experiences and those in our community who are struggling. We want to raise as much as we can to support this service- every pound you donate will be doubled so please give as generously as you can. Thank you so much!

Please donate here, we so appreciate it : https://www.charityextra.com/jami/151

Try These Simple Depression Meals When Life Gets Hard by Kara Reynolds

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 9 Comments

(image: Unsplash)

Being an adult is exhausting.  We’re expected to work, build a career, keep a house, feed ourselves, socialize…the list goes on and on.  When you have kids, that list doesn’t get any shorter — instead, it expands to include keeping small humans alive, healthy, entertained and happy.  Becoming a mom is supposed to be one of the most magical parts of your life, but what they don’t tell you is that it can also be the hardest. Mom life is hard. There’s no point in sugar-coating it.

When that massive list of things that you’re expected to do becomes overwhelming, here are some simple depression meals that can help you eat healthily and keep everyone fed without putting in too much effort or relying on takeout. 

Nutrients That Impact Depression Symptoms

Depression is one of those things that we tend to only talk about in reference to other people, but it’s more common than you might think.  According to the World Health Organization (WHO). around 5% of the global population suffers from depression or around 280 million people. There are a lot of different ways to manage your depression symptoms, all of which should be overseen by a medical professional, but there are some small changes that you can make at home that might have a positive impact.  This includes changing the foods that you eat.

Research has shown that some specific nutrients might help manage depression symptoms include; 

  • Amino acids like tryptophan (found in turkey and chocolate)
  • Omega-3 Fatty Acids (found in oily fish)
  • Selenium
  • Iron
  • Iodine

Switching your diet around to ensure that you’re including these nutrients can help make the job of managing your depression symptoms a little easier. Here are some of my favourite depression meals for those nights when nothing else seems to be helping but you’ve still got a house of little humans to feed.

Charcuterie 

If you were a kid in the 90s, you probably grew up having Lunchables for lunch during the week. They were quick, easy and had most of the nutrients a growing kid might need to get through the day — if you were content to subsist on crackers, deli meat and sometimes cheese. Okay, so they weren’t the healthiest option, but if you make them fancy, put them on a plank of wood and call them charcuterie, they’re one of my favourite depression meals. 

The nice thing about charcuterie is that there is no wrong way to do it.  Pick your favourite meats, crackers, dips, fruits and veggies, and arrange them on a plate or tray.  Then pick and choose what you want to eat. It’s simple, it’s fun, and it’s a great way to make sure that everyone is getting fed when all you have the energy to do is assemble things on a plate.

Fish

Fish might seem like a lot of hassle, but it doesn’t have to be.  It’s also a great option for depression meals because it tends to be high in magnesium which is another nutrient that can help with managing depression symptoms. 

This simple sheet pan haddock bake is a great way to get your nutrients without making a  big mess in the kitchen.   It’s 5 ingredients — haddock, crackers, butter, garlic salt and lemon — and five steps — and one of those steps is preheating the oven and I’m not even sure that counts. If you’re not a fan of haddock, swap it out for your favourite fish. 

Stir Fry

Stir fry is easily one of my favorite meals.  It’s easy, it’s cheap, it’s fast, and you can make it with whatever you have in the kitchen.  Start by picking your protein. Then, pick your stir fry veggies — these can be fresh, canned or frozen. Fry them up in the oil of your choice, top with your sauce, and serve over rice. 

The key to a good stir fry, regardless of your chosen ingredients, is the sauce.  My go-to stir fry sauce only requires a handful of ingredients, most of which you probably already have in your kitchen.: 

  • ½ cup soy sauce
  • ½ cup chicken broth
  • 1-2 tablespoons of cornstarch
  • 1 tablespoon minced garlic
  • 1 tablespoon minced ginger
  • 1 tablespoon brown sugar
  • 1 tablespoon olive oil
  • 1 teaspoon rice vinegar.

Mix and pour, and you’ve got the tastiest stir fry sauce this side of your favourite Chinese restaurant. 

Peanut Butter & Jelly (Jam)

It sounds basic, but that’s because it is.  Peanut butter — and other nut butters, if you have a peanut allergy in the house — are full of healthy proteins and other nutrients that will help you feel full longer.  Pair it with some natural fruit preserves and your favourite whole wheat or multigrain bread and you’ve got a halfway healthy meal that takes almost no time or effort to prepare. 

You can always spice up your PB&J if you have more spoons.  If you’ve got more of a sweet tooth you can add sliced bananas, honey, or even marshmallow fluff.  The possibilities are endless. 

Be Kind To Yourself

As long as you’re eating, it doesn’t really matter what you eat for dinner — but making healthier choices can help to make you feel better in the long run.  Try a couple of my favourite depression meals and see if they make it into your regular meal schedule.

Above all else, be kind to yourself. 


This article was written by Kara Reynolds, editor at Momish.

Sophie Says It’s Okay Not To Be Okay- Esther Marshall Book Review by Eleanor

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment
(image: Esther Marshall/ Sophie Says)

I am absolutely delighted to read and review this incredible childrens book from the Sophie Says series by author and award winning campaigner Esther Marshall (with illustrator Buzz Burry).

Esther’s story is close to my heart as not only is she from my own community but her late sister Rebecca z’l was a doctor who had bipolar disorder and sadly passed away a few years ago, while Esther was writing her second book. Esther has shared that it was her sister who encouraged and inspired her idea to write the childrens books that she couldn’t see for her own child (in terms of positive messages, inspiring rolemodels and diverse characters in terms of both race and gender). Through her sister’s struggles, Esther also began to include positive mental health messages on talking and sharing emotions, self belief and self esteem too.

Esther has said,

“I knew from the second my son was born I wanted to teach him that girls were just as strong and powerful as boys, that people from different backgrounds to him could teach him things and he should listen and be kind to everyone.
The problem was, all the books I could find to read to him had:

  • Mostly male characters (even the animals)
  • Little to no diversity or representation
  • No female role models he could look up to

So I decided that if I couldn’t find the book I wanted to read to my son, I’d better write my own.

I want all children to know and believe that they can achieve their dreams regardless of gender, race, religion or class”,

Esther at Sophie Says has not only thought about what stories she wants to tell through the books, but what messages children reading them will take and absorb. She has partnered with illustrator Buzz Burry and comments, ‘we are helping children bypass harmful stereotypes before they set in by changing the face of children’s literature. Our mission is to enable all children to grow up feeling equipped and empowered to face their futures. To learn more about themselves, others and the world around them. We are helping parents to teach their children positive messages and providing a toolkit to navigate some of the trickier conversations.‘

These books teach children about:

• Emotional Resilience
• Mental health
• Equal opportunities
• Relatable representation 
• Diversity and inclusion
• Self-belief
• Responsible messaging 

Esther very kindly gifted me copies of her first two books- Sophie Says I Can I will– which is about a little girl Sophie with big dreams and no limits. and Sophie Says It’s Okay Not To Be Okay which focuses on Sophie, Jordyn and Jamie on their journey as they learn that it’s okay to talk about their feelings and it’s okay not to be okay. The books are for children in the early years, ages 3-7 years and reading the books with either parents, carers or teachers is recommended. Esther told me she has ‘tried to create books which cater to both home and school so that it can be embedded in both parts of a child’s life and become the foundation of them building resilience at an early age.’

Sophie Says It’s Okay not to be Okay is a very special book- and one of the first I have seen to address children’s mental health in an age appropriate way, to teach children about their emotions and that it’s OK to feel sad, scared or worried. The book follows Jamie who is looking down and feeling sad but whose best friends Sophie and Jordyn help him through and Sophie tells him ‘its okay not to be okay’. They take him to the zoo to help him feel better and speak to Sophie’s older sister Meghan who is wise and will give good advice. Esther named the character after Meghan, Duchess of Sussex who she met with Prince Harry and other young leaders and was inspired by (she gave them a copy of the book too!)

Meghan (the character) says this important message,

”It’s okay to be sad and okay to feel down. Just make sure you have good friends around. There may be days when you feel you’re alone but around us, you’ll always be at home. Its Okay not to be okay”

The book also reinforces self belief and esteem , reiterating that ‘YOU are enough!’ and encourages children to talk about their feelings because it can help. Jamie then says he will speak about his feelings in a place he feels safe in the zoo,

‘I don’t really know how to describe how I feel
As I can’t work out what’s in my head and what’s real.

He said ‘ a smile may be what you see, but that’s not what I feel inside me

There are times I feel quite alone because these feelings are unknown

Some days I’m happy and some days I’m sad and other days I just feel so bad’

(image: Esther Marshall/Buzz Burry/Sophie Says)

His friends then show him support and love, take him to the funfair, all while reinforcing positive kindness and support- ‘Yes we can!” . The book talks positively about the kindness of friendships always being a safe space to talk. This is so important for children particularly in the early years who are learning to understand their feelings.

Esthers writing is beautiful- on one of the last pages of the book she says ‘Whatever you do, be kind, you never know what’s going on in someone’s mind’.

The book was informed by her sister Rebecca’s struggle with mental illness (bipolar disorder). Esther has said, ‘I had always planned to write another book all around mental health to help children understand their feelings and talk about them more openly, and I sadly lost my sister, Rebecca, to mental illness as I was writing it. So the second book Sophie Says It’s Okay not to be Okay is dedicated to her memory’.

Esther wanted to amplify the message and so it was released on World Mental Health Day. The book provides a toolkit for parents who want to help their children to express their own emotions.

She has been visiting schools and doing zoom readings of her book to share the messages for her. Esther told me, I would love that as a result of children reading the Sophie Says books that children understand these vitally important lessons through a fun way of learning and it helps them build resilience and confidence to go out and achieve their full potential whilst being able to understand and manage both their physical and mental health. .’.

Esther is a true force of nature and someone who inspires me so much. She has just released a third book in the series Sophie Says Be Proud of Who You Are which is about Sophie and the rest of the Sophie Says crew on their exciting seaside adventure as they help their friend Priya build her confidence, as they guide her through believing in herself and being proud of who she is. The perfect book to help your child build their confidence and self esteem!

I would recommend the Sophie Says books to all parents, teachers and carers of young children. I can’t wait to see how this brand grows and what Esther achieves (she has achieved so much already!). She should be rightly proud of her work and all she has created.

To learn more about Sophie Says and buy the books click here

You can read Esthers blog dedicated to her sister here: https://www.sophiesaysofficial.com/blogs/dear-rebecca. (If you are over 18 as contains triggering content)

About Esther

Hi, I’m the founder of Sophie Says and the author of the books within the series. The idea for the first book (Sophie Says I Can, I Will) came to me after having my son, Asher (who is the first and most important reader of all the books!).

I knew I wanted him to grow up understanding that both girls and boys could achieve anything that they set their minds to, but I couldn’t find any books that featured a female lead character (a human one, not an animal one!) that really represented the message I wanted to teach him. So I thought, if I can’t find the story I want to tell, I’d better write it myself.

I was gifted two books in exchange for an honest review. Any links are unpaid. These books are incredible.