Living with bipolar 1 from the age of 16 meant living with deep depressions, of which suicidal thoughts were a part. Being able to safely share these with family and psychiatrists in the past saved my life and helped me hold on in the dark moments of bipolar episodes. I am not alone in feeling this way- millions are struggling now, today. Medication, therapy and support keep me well.
So today I read from my essay in this very special book to tell you- ‘You will feel the sun and smell the rain again, even after suicidal depressions when you lay in bed wanting to disappear. ‘
Please reach for help when you start getting these thoughts and hold on- a better day is coming. Helpline numbers includingSamaritans at 116 123 are available if you need to talk and feel in crisis.
I also know the devastation of losing a loved one to suicide and conversely, to help people through these thoughts. Their stories are not my own so I am not sharing them today but I hope that today and every day we focus on suicide prevention and support for all who are struggling.
Today’s blog is about a very special calming self care gift box – The Steady Box that was kindly sent to me by post to review from James Marchant at The Little Box of Mindfulness here in the UK.
I chose the Steady Box to review as someone who lives with an anxiety disorder at times and I wanted to see this self care box and how it can help calm anxiety by being mindful. The Steady Box is created for ‘people navigating anxiety, worry or emotionally overwhelming periods. A thoughtful gift designed to bring grounding, reassurance and gentle moments of calm.’. The Steady Box creates space for pause, presence and the feeling of being supported.
I opened the little black box and on the packaging it says ‘You are in someone’s mind this moment is yours‘. So already as you open it, you are feeling loved and welcomed. Each box also includes access to digital mindfulness practices, extending the feeling of care long after the gift is received. When you open the little box which is compact and fits through a letter box easily, you open to a winking face and a message- ‘You are not your thoughts, this moment is yours. Breathe. You’ve got this.‘ and some beautiful resources nestled within:
(image: The Little Box of Mindfulness)
A painted blue and cream handcrafted ceramic thumb stone (created by a local potter) to help with mindfulness and slow breathing when anxious. You hold it between your thumb and finger, focus mindfully on its texture and weight and then breathe slowly, returning to the present. The stone feels so calming and will make a lovely gift to a friend or loved one who needs to practise calming anxiety through mindfulness and breathing.
A Little Mindfulness box- a ‘Pause Pack’ containing items to help you ‘reconnect and reflect’, exploring at your own pace. These contain reflection cards with calming photos, affirmations about dealing with anxiety and lifes challenges( and finding strength and peace) and on the back, mindfulness prompts. They remind you to be in this moment, be still, breathe, name and ground yourself in the present;
There is also a leaflet teaching you how to ground yourself in the present (eg 5 things you can see, 4 things you can heal, 3 things you can hear) and a QR code for digital mindfulness resources that James has curated online.
Lastly, the box includes a Mindful Checklist card where you can tick off activities to help calm anxiety through mindfulness eg ‘I drank some water’, ‘I moved my body’, ‘I reminded myself I am safe’, I let go of one unhelpful thought’ , ‘I paused and noticed my breath.‘
(image: Little Box of Mindfulness)
This box retails at £15 and it makes the perfect letter box gift to send to a friend that needs to breathe, find a moment of peace to steady and ground themselves. I would recommend it as someone who lives with anxiety- I particularly liked the calming activity of slowing down and breathing with the thumbstone. As someone who has learnt a bit about how to practise mindfulness, I would say this box would be particularly useful at managing anxiety before it turns into a panic attack.
The Little Box of Mindfulness describes this as a’ refined letterbox gift for moments when words feel hard to find. A way to offer reassurance, presence and the quiet message that someone is thinking of them.‘. I would agree that it would make a lovely gift to send to reassure someone!
James Marchant, the founder and creator of the Little Box of Mindfulness, said to me, “I created these boxes with the simple hope of helping people feel remembered and supported during difficult moments, so it means a great deal to know the Steady Box resonated with you personally.” I truly love these products and the story behind them!
James created ‘The Little Box of Mindfulness’ due to his own battle with anxiety, stress and career burn out. He says, ” I’ve experienced anxiety in my own life and have seen first-hand how difficult moments can affect both individuals and families.The Little Box Of Mindfulness was created from a simple belief: when someone is struggling, small acts of kindness can make a real difference.Sometimes it’s hard to know what to say or how to help. My hope is that these letterbox gifts make it a little easier to reach out and remind someone they’re not alone.”
James’ story is so inspiring and I truly love these gift boxes and the concept. As well as the Steady Box there are two other boxes in the mindfulness range. They also sell beautiful self care mental health gift sets for thinking of you, bereavement, stress and burn out which are lovely and contain different treats. You can see all the mental health gift sets here: https://littleboxofmindfulness.co.uk/collections/mental-health-gift
Thank you James for gifting me this wonderful box to review!
(Image: Little Box of Mindfulness)
This article is a sponsored and gifted review. All thoughts on the product are my genuine review.
Stress is a normal part of life, but when it becomes persistent or overwhelming, it can have a significant impact on emotional wellbeing, physical health, relationships, and overall quality of life. Many people experience periods of increased stress due to work responsibilities, family obligations, financial concerns, health issues, or major life changes. While occasional stress is expected, chronic stress and anxiety can gradually interfere with daily functioning and make even simple tasks feel difficult.
One of the most common signs that stress is becoming problematic is when it begins affecting sleep. People may struggle to fall asleep, wake frequently throughout the night, or wake up feeling exhausted despite getting several hours of rest. Poor sleep often contributes to increased irritability, difficulty concentrating, memory problems, and reduced productivity during the day. Over time, this cycle can become difficult to break without addressing the underlying causes.
Anxiety can also present itself in many different ways. Some individuals experience constant worrying or racing thoughts that are difficult to control. Others notice physical symptoms such as muscle tension, headaches, rapid heartbeat, stomach discomfort, sweating, or feelings of restlessness. These physical symptoms are real and can significantly impact daily life, even when there is no immediate danger or threat present.
Another important sign of ongoing anxiety is avoiding situations that once felt comfortable. Someone may begin declining social invitations, avoiding public places, postponing important decisions, or putting off responsibilities because they feel overwhelmed. While avoidance may provide temporary relief, it often strengthens anxiety over time and makes returning to normal activities increasingly difficult.
Stress and anxiety frequently affect workplace performance as well. Individuals may find themselves struggling to stay focused during meetings, completing projects more slowly than usual, or feeling mentally exhausted by routine responsibilities. Decision-making may become more difficult, and confidence can gradually decrease. These challenges are common and should not be viewed as personal weaknesses but rather as potential indicators that additional support could be beneficial.
Relationships can also be impacted. Increased stress may cause someone to become more withdrawn, impatient, or emotionally reactive. Misunderstandings with spouses, family members, friends, or coworkers may occur more frequently. Loved ones often notice changes in mood before the individual fully recognizes them. Open communication and early intervention can help prevent these difficulties from becoming more serious.
(image: Unsplash)
Healthy coping strategies play an important role in managing everyday stress. Regular physical activity has consistently been shown to improve mood and reduce anxiety symptoms by releasing natural chemicals that promote emotional well-being. Even moderate activities such as walking, cycling, or yoga can provide meaningful benefits when performed consistently.
Maintaining healthy sleep habits is equally important. Going to bed and waking up at consistent times, limiting caffeine later in the day, reducing screen time before bedtime, and creating a relaxing evening routine may improve sleep quality. Nutrition also contributes to mental wellness, as balanced meals help support stable energy levels and brain function throughout the day.
Mindfulness techniques, deep breathing exercises, meditation, and progressive muscle relaxation can help reduce the body’s stress response. Many individuals also benefit from journaling, spending time outdoors, engaging in hobbies, or maintaining meaningful social connections with supportive friends and family members.
However, self care alone is not always enough. When symptoms persist for several weeks, interfere with work or relationships, or significantly reduce quality of life, speaking with a qualified mental health professional can be an important next step. A comprehensive psychiatric evaluation helps identify contributing factors and allows treatment recommendations to be tailored to each individual’s unique circumstances.
Modern psychiatric care often includes a combination of approaches. Depending on a person’s needs, treatment may involve psychotherapy, medication management, lifestyle recommendations, or collaboration with therapists and primary care physicians. Every treatment plan should be individualized, with ongoing monitoring to ensure that progress continues and adjustments are made when necessary.
Seeking help early can often prevent symptoms from becoming more severe. Mental health conditions are highly treatable, and many individuals experience substantial improvement with appropriate care. Reaching out for professional guidance demonstrates strength and a commitment to long-term health rather than weakness.
If you or someone you care about has been struggling with persistent anxiety, chronic stress, mood changes, difficulty sleeping, or emotional challenges that interfere with daily life, consulting aCarmel IN psychiatrist can provide valuable guidance, accurate diagnosis, and personalised treatment options designed to help restore emotional wellness and improve overall quality of life.
Bipolar disorder is often misunderstood as simply experiencing occasional mood swings. In reality, it is a complex mental health condition that exists on a spectrum, with several distinct types that affect individuals in different ways. Formerly known as manic depression, bipolar disorder involves extreme shifts in mood, energy, activity levels, and the ability to carry out day-to-day tasks. These are not ordinary ups and downs—they are episodes that can last for days, weeks, or longer, and they can significantly disrupt a person’s life, relationships, and sense of self.
Understanding the different types of bipolar disorder is the first step toward recognition, appropriate treatment, and long-term stability. Whether you are seeking answers for yourself or a loved one, clarity about these diagnoses can open the door to compassionate care and effective support. This article explores the three primary types of bipolar disorder—Bipolar I, Bipolar II, and Cyclothymic Disorder—and highlights the importance of comprehensive recovery pathways.
Bipolar I Disorder
Bipolar I disorder is defined by the presence of at least one manic episode that lasts for at least seven days, or by manic symptoms so severe that immediate hospital care is required. Mania is more than just feeling unusually happy or energetic. During a manic episode, individuals may experience a distorted sense of well-being, racing thoughts, rapid speech, a decreased need for sleep, and impulsive or risky behaviors such as excessive spending or unwise decisions. In some cases, mania can cause a break from reality, known as psychosis.
Depressive episodes often accompany Bipolar I, typically lasting at least two weeks. These episodes can be profound and debilitating, involving deep sadness, loss of interest in activities, changes in sleep and appetite, and difficulty concentrating. The manic episodes of Bipolar I can be severe and even dangerous, making this form of the disorder particularly challenging for both the individual and their support network.
Bipolar II Disorder
Bipolar II disorder is sometimes mistakenly viewed as a milder version of Bipolar I, but it is a distinct diagnosis with its own set of challenges. It is characterised by at least one
major depressive episode and at least one hypomanic episode, but never a full manic episode. Hypomania is a less extreme form of mania that does not cause the same level of impairment in social or occupational functioning and does not involve psychosis.
While hypomanic episodes may feel productive or even pleasant, they are still part of a pattern that can be destabilizing. The depressive episodes in Bipolar II, however, can be lengthy and severe. In fact, individuals with Bipolar II often seek help during depressive phases and may be misdiagnosed with major depressive disorder if hypomanic episodes go unrecognized. This makes accurate diagnosis essential for effective treatment.
Cyclothymic Disorder
Cyclothymic disorder, or cyclothymia, is often described as a milder but more chronic form of bipolar disorder. It involves numerous periods of hypomanic symptoms and depressive symptoms that last for at least two years in adults (or one year in children and adolescents), but these symptoms do not meet the full criteria for a hypomanic or major depressive episode.
For someone with cyclothymia, mood instability is a constant presence. The mood swings occur for at least half of the time during the two-year period, with no more than two consecutive months of stable mood. As one psychiatrist describes it, “It may seem like you’re just going through a string of good days and a string of bad days. But the mood shifts keep going, and there’s little neutral time in between”. While the symptoms are less severe than in Bipolar I or II, the persistent nature of cyclothymia can still significantly impact relationships, work, and overall quality of life.
The Importance of Bipolar Disorder Rehabilitation
Receiving a diagnosis is an important milestone, but it is only the beginning of the journey. Bipolar disorder is a lifelong condition that requires ongoing management. This is where bipolar disorder rehabilitation becomes essential. Rehabilitation goes beyond simply taking medication—it encompasses a holistic approach to rebuilding functioning, enhancing quality of life, and preventing relapse.
Evidence-based psychological interventions play a critical role in recovery. Approaches such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) have shown promise in helping individuals develop emotional regulation skills, improve social functioning, and manage symptoms. Group-based programs and community re-entry initiatives can also support individuals in transitioning from inpatient settings to more independent living, enhancing medication adherence and global functioning.
Rehabilitation is not about “fixing” someone—it is about empowering individuals to live meaningful lives alongside their condition. With the right combination of medication, therapy, lifestyle adjustments, and social support, many people with bipolar disorder achieve stability and pursue their goals. The path may look different for everyone, but recovery is not only possible—it is the expectation.
Key Takeaways
Understanding the different types of bipolar disorder is vital for recognising the unique experiences of those affected. Bipolar I involves full manic episodes that can be severe and require hospitalisation. Bipolar II features hypomanic episodes alongside often-prolonged depression. Cyclothymic disorder is a chronic pattern of milder mood swings that persist over years. Each type requires a tailored approach to treatment and support.
If you or someone you love is navigating a bipolar disorder diagnosis, remember that you are not alone. Accurate diagnosis, compassionate care, and comprehensive rehabilitation can transform lives. Reach out to mental health professionals, build a support network, and take each step at your own pace. Understanding is the foundation—and from there, healing can begin.
Trigger warning: discussions of FND, illness and mental health.
Hi! My name is Liam Virgo and I’m pleased to share my story with Be Your Own Light blog.
In 2016, at age 13 and after months in hospital, I was diagnosed with severe Functional Neurological Disorder (FND). I was suddenly paralysed and unable to speak. I had all my abilities taken away from me and was left severely disabled. For six months my mind switched off and I didn’t know who or what anything was. I don’t remember the early days of my illness and life before it is a blur. My FND resulted in me being bedridden, unable to walk or talk. I felt trapped inside my own body.
Being a prisoner in my own body felt like my body had completely betrayed me. The psychological impact of being locked inside my own body is still felt to this day. It’s been a long hard battle with FND- painful and very isolating. The doctors aren’t sure what caused my FND. All we know is that it happened and I was severely affected by the condition but without any real explanation as to why this was the case.
However, while I was bed bound I found comfort in a few things and one of them was London. It was my dream to visit the city but because of my FND I wasn’t well enough to go. I was supported by CAMHS (UK NHS child mental health services) for four years and they created London themed progress charts to help motivate me to achieve my wish.
FND hasn’t only affected my physical health but my mental health too. The impact of severe FND left me with difficult feelings and emotional difficulties. The emotional scars of FND are still felt to this day. Over the years I’ve been supported by Psychiatrists and Psychologists. Some of the overwhelming feelings I experienced and still do are anxiety, I felt misunderstood and isolated. I sometimes became tearful and emotional. I was put on different medications over the years but nothing really helped. I also had many other assessments and strategies used to help understand my mental health including a cognitive test and I also had a mood diary.
Because of FND I’ve missed years of schooling as I wasn’t well enough to return to education.
Eventually after three years my physical health started to improve and when I was well enough I made it to London and have been back many times since to my favourite place. I went to London with my parents and I loved visiting Central London. I went to all main sights such as London Eye, Big Ben, Tower of London, Buckingham Palace and lots more.
10 years on, I’m now slowly recovering and learning to walk again. I’m using my voice, the voice that FND stole from me to raise awareness about the condition. I still have very difficult days with FND but I’m learning to live with my new normal and adjusting to life post severe FND. I’ve had a very long journey with FND but I know if I can get through all of that I can get through anything.
At 13, I lost all my abilities to FND but one thing FND could never take from me is my determination.
(image: Liam Virgo)
The medical professionals are unsure if I’ll ever make a full recovery because of the impact of severe FND but I’m now at a stage in my life where I’m able to live with the condition. I’m able to talk and I can move my arms again. I’m no longer bedridden and can walk with support. I still battle with FND daily but I’m determined to never give up hope. I still use a wheelchair but just sitting in a wheelchair is a big achievement for me as I couldn’t tolerate sitting in anything before.
You can follow Liam on his adventures here on Instagram.Thank you Liam for your bravery in using your voice and sharing your story.
On 1st March 2016, I wrote my very first blog about my mental health struggles with bipolar disorder and anxiety. For me, it was an outlet to share with friends and family what I was experiencing after one of the worst bipolar episodes I had faced and after hospitalisation in 2014. I didn’t realise that this traumatic time in my life, would also cause my mental health to dip and struggle further as I developed PTSD symptoms (panic attacks) and sat on a 2 year waiting list for NHS therapy. Professional support was not coming easily during this time, and so this blog became not only a therapeutic outlet but a place to connect with others going through similar things. And to explain to those who had never experienced mental illness, exactly what it can do but just how you can support those experiencing it.
Part of me can’t fully believe that I have been blogging consistently for 10 years. There have been times where I have wanted to give up but this little blog has been my saviour and in truth, helped me to launch a writing career that I did not expect and am so grateful for. It has also helped others to share their mental health stories and products, been a platform for mental health campaigns and charities and I am super proud of the impact we have had. One of our biggest accolades is being a Top 10 UK mental health blog by Vuelio every year since 2018- which means we are having a positive impact and reach!
The blog has published over 800 posts, with hundreds of thousands of views! It is read on every continent with a particularly large readership in the USA (as well as UK and other countries). We have covered so many topics- bipolar disorder, PTSD, anxiety disorders, depression, pre and post natal depression, OCD, BPD, eating disorders, psychosis, mania, schizophrenia, schizoaffective disorder, trichotillomania, addictions (drug, alcohol, gambling), body dysmorphia and mental health topics like child mental health, work stress, emotional burnout, relationships, domestic and sexual abuse, homelessness. We have shared about wellness products and worked with inspiring health and lifestyle brands.
The blog inspired me to share my own story far and wide – writing for mental health charities Mind, Rethink, Time to Change, Bipolar UK, No Panic, SANE and Metro.co.uk, The Telegraph, Happiful, Glamour, Jewish News, Huff Post. Featured in Cosmopolitan, Elle, Yahoo News and other publications. Thank you particularly to the editors at the publications for sharing my story and believing in my mission! This also led to me writing my book ‘Bring me to Light’ which was published in 2019 by Trigger and remains one of my proudest achievements. I then released my children’s book ‘Arabella and the Worry Cloud’ and had some writing featured in ‘The Book of Hope’ by my friends Jonny Benjamin MBE and Britt Pfluger (an amazing experience!). In 2017-18, I was also involved with setting up the Jami mental health shabbat in my community and spoke in several synagogues and at a community festival Limmud with my Dad, about our journey with bipolar. The same year that I started this blog (2016), I also met my now husband, who supports me through all of my writing and mental health work.
As I look back over the past 10 years, to where we were in 2016 with mental health stigma, I am proud to have played a small part in changing the landscape and narrative online around mental illness, particularly bipolar disorder and psychosis. We have many followers on social media platforms and continue to share about mental health and well being and be a resource for all those who need it, so they never feel alone.
(image: Ineffable Living)
Thank you to every single contributor (and every reader) to Be Ur Own Light Blog 2016-2026. Your words and belief in our mission to end the stigma around mental illness have meant the world to me. I hope going forward I can continue to share more real stories, more important information on care and treatment and campaign for better care.
There is still a way to go. NHS waiting lists are too long and care is under funded, leading to not enough beds. Mental health stigma online (and sometimes offline) sadly still remains high. As a society, although we have improved, we still need to fully understand mental health conditions and separate them from the person themselves. I am optimistic that things can and will change.
To everyone reading this going through a period of mental ill health or living with a chronic mental illness, I see you and you are never alone. As a blog community, we can come together to empower each other, so no one ever feels invisible and I hope that I can continue to write too.
Thank you, from my heart, for the past 10 years! Here’s to many more years,
10 years ago, Rabbi Daniel Epstein and the team at Jami charity had an idea about making the stigmatised topic of mental health in the UK Jewish community be more visible amongst synagogues and organisations. They did this by focusing on the day of rest- Shabbat, with Rabbis and speakers of lived experience or mental health professionals. I was lucky to come on board as a volunteer in the first few years, alongside a wonderful team. My role was to help contact Jewish shuls and organisations by email and in the first year I believe we got the Shabbat in to over 80 organisations and over 100 in subsequent years.
My reason for doing this was because I struggled with bipolar disorder (depression, mania and psychosis) and anxiety/PTSD from when I was 15. I felt that no one really talked about it publicly on a communal level and I was inspired by my friend Jonny Benjamin MBE, who was open about having schizoaffective disorder and taking a sledge hammer to stigma. I also admired the work of Jami in the hubs and with their Head Room Cafe and I wanted to make a difference.
I can’t quite believe that the Jami Mental Health Shabbat is 10 years old this year. The Shabbat enabled me to speak about lived experience with my Dad (who also has bipolar) to two large communities (my childhood one- Bushey and husbands- Chigwell) and my Dad spoke at Belsize Square and Edgware Yeshurun about our joint story. I was diagnosed with bipolar at 16 and my Dad was at 44. We were honoured to help dispell stigma through telling our stories from the pulpit, however difficult they were.
The Shabbat has also enabled thousands of people to have conversations and mental illness is no longer hidden in the shadows to be feared. The theme for the tenth Jami Mental Health Shabbat is ‘Bringing Mental Health to the Table’
Jami says, “This special Shabbat is an opportunity for us to encourage conversations on mental health, raise awareness of mental illness and distress and share ideas on how to support ourselves and others within our community. There are many ways for you, your synagogue, school, student or youth group to get involved and everyone can mark Jami Mental Health Shabbat in their own way. Some communities choose to arrange for members of their congregation to share their lived experience or invite mental health professionals to lead a talk, discussion or panel event.”
This year you can get involved by hosting a meal for JMHS and ask your guests to donate instead of bringing a gift, sign up for the free toolkit of resources (services, activities for all ages and much more) or donate at https://jamiuk.org/donate-to-jmhs_meal/ . For other ways to get involved please see: https://jamiuk.org/get-involved/jmhs/.
Jami Mental Health Shabbat coincides with Torah portion- Bo. On this Shabbat, we read about the plague of darkness, which can be likened to the experiences of many living with mental illness and distress. The Torah portion also talks about how the Israelites, full of hope, could see through the darkness into the light. This special Shabbat is an opportunity for us to encourage conversations on mental health, raise awareness of mental illness and distress and share ideas on how to support ourselves and others within our community.
As the Shabbat is this weekend, I want to show my support. Although I won’t be sharing our story in shul this year, everyone doing so should be so proud. I will be donating to Jami to show my support.
Where to get help with your mental health
If you or someone you know needs mental health help, there are a variety of options depending on the issue of concern.
SHOUT – 24/7 crisis text service – Text Jami to 85258
Ring your GP or out of hours service for an emergency appointment
Contact your Community Mental Health Team (CMHT) if you have one
Samaritans – Call Samaritans on Freephone 116 123 (24 hours a day)
Call the PapyrusHopelineUK, on 0800 068 41 41 or text 88247 if you are under 35 and worried about how you are feeling. Or call if you are worried about a young person.
Call 999 or NHS Direct on 111 (England) or 0845 46 47 (Wales)
Don’t hesitate to call 999 in mental health emergencies
Heres to 10 amazing years of mental health conversations!
Everyone tells you how amazing it is once the baby comes. And it is, no doubt. But everyone also skips the part of how hard and confusing it can be at times. You lack sleep, run on instinct and love, and all of the responsibility comes down on you hard. But all that’s normal.
Every parent gets that mix of joy and struggle at some point. However, if the downs start to outweigh the ups, you should take a pause and look at it more deeply.
All the Emotions No One Warns You About
Before birth, it’s all about the baby – the ultrasound photos, due date, tiny clothes and picking names. But few people prepare you for what happens after.
In reality, many of the emotional changes begin well before birth. Reading about mental health during pregnancy can help expecting parents notice early signs of anxiety or mood shifts that often carry into postpartum life.
All the hormonal changes and lack of sleep can make even the simplest task feel difficult. Anxiety, sadness, and self-doubt can creep in, sometimes out of nowhere. In fact, around one in five women experience postpartum depression or anxiety, and partners often feel it too.
But remember, no one really gets into it completely ready, and everyone learns as they go.
Rest Isn’t a Bonus, but a Necessity
“Sleep when the baby sleeps.” You’ve heard it a million times, and it’s certainly easier said than done. But rest really is essential. It’s how your body heals, and your mind resets.
You can try using the 5-5-5 rule: five days in bed, five days on the bed, five days near the bed. No strict formula to it, of course, but use is a reminder to slow down a bit.
If naps still seem impossible, just lie down for a few minutes and breathe, even when your brain insists that your baby needs you every second. And if someone offers to take a night shift, let them. One full night of sleep can change how you see everything.
Pregnancy and early parenthood can really impact maternal well-being. You must learn how to rest effectively, because your recovery is your number one priority next to your baby.
When “Baby Blues” Don’t Fade
Crying for no clear reason? Worrying constantly about the baby? That’s normal in those first days. However, if it lasts more than two weeks, or you start feeling numb, detached, constantly anxious and worried, there could be something more to it.
Watch out for signs like:
Persistently low mood
Trouble bonding with your baby
Racing thoughts or panic
Appetite or sleep changes that don’t make sense
Thoughts of harm to yourself or your baby
If these sound familiar, reach out to your doctor, midwife, or mental-health professional. With help, things do get better. Getting support early makes healing faster and safer, for both of you.
Take Care of Your Body
It’s hard to think clearly when you haven’t eaten since breakfast or when you’ve lived on coffee for days. Keep yourself hydrated – a water bottle within reach works best. Your body needs steady fuel, especially if you’re breastfeeding.
Once your doctor says it’s okay, take short walks or stretch a little. You don’t need to “work out”, just move a bit. And if you’re healing from a C-section or stitches, follow the recovery plan. Pain makes everything harder.
Small Things Count
Some days, you’ll feel like you’ve disappeared under all the baby tasks. But you’re still there, you just need to remind yourself.
Try reclaiming tiny moments. Close the bathroom door and take that shower – even if it’s a quick one. Put on a song you love. Drink your coffee before it goes cold. It sounds silly, but it matters. The little things add up. You don’t need a meditation app or fancy breathing routine.
Just stop for a second, notice your breath, maybe wiggle your toes on the floor. That’s it. Even a minute or two of peace can reset your nervous system.
Know When to Ask For Help
There’s a point where no amount of self-care or deep breathing can help. If you’re struggling to function, or if each day feels harder instead of easier, that’s your signal. That doesn’t mean you’re weak; it means you’re human.
Postpartum depression and anxiety are real medical conditions, but they’re treatable. A doctor, midwife, or therapist who understands postpartum life can help you find the right mix of support. Sometimes that’s talking, sometimes medication, sometimes both. The right kind of help makes everything easier.
Give Yourself Time
Recovery after birth doesn’t move in a straight line. One day you’ll feel like yourself again, the next you won’t, and that’s fine. Your body, mind, and heart all need time to settle into this new life you have.
Rest when you can, ask for help when you can’t.
Some days, progress is just making it through – and that’s still progress.
For many people, Christmas time/festive season is a time for happiness, family and bringing people together; however,one in seven UK couples face a hidden grief : infertility..
Research reveals that nearly three in four people battling infertility are burdened with feelings of failure, adding to the hidden grief many already feel during the holidays. In response, mental health platform JAAQ wants to spread awareness around why infertility can be harder during the holidays and what we can do to approach the topic sensitively.
Male fertility coach explains why infertility feels heavier during the festive season
Male fertility coach, Shaun Greenway, who was diagnosed with azoospermia, explains on JAAQ why the holiday season is so difficult: “We got a pregnancy announcement at Christmas, and it took me right back to that place. That hurt. That weird feeling of happiness mixed in with jealousy and anger and pain.” Even after he had twins via donor sperm, the emotions didn’t disappear “It will always be part of me. It’s always there.”
Shaun’s experience highlights a truth many people face – that infertility doesn’t end with treatment or conception; it changes shape, often resurfacing during emotionally charged times like Christmas, a time filled with pregnancy announcements and marketing imagery filled with children and togetherness.
Founder and CEO of Fertility Help Hub, Eloise Edington, knows that pain well. Supporting her devastated husband while navigating her own grief, she recalls when speaking on JAAQ: “Supporting my devastated husband while also equally grieving myself and knowing that we would never have a biological child together meant we were both drowning in separate pain.”
She’s open about the reality of those moments: “Lots of crying, lots of eating chocolate, wine, being together. Not pretty. Not Pinterest-worthy. Just real.” For many couples facing infertility, this is the reality of Christmas – raw, difficult and far from the idealised celebrations we often imagine.
(image: Priscilla Prisceez, Unsplash)
4 dos and don’ts for talking about infertility this holiday season
To make the festive season a little easier, mental health platform JAAQ has revealed four essential dos and don’ts for talking about infertility this Christmas – whether you’re facing it yourself, or want to approach the topic sensitively with others.
Dos:
1. Think before you ask sensitive questions about pregnancy or starting a family and wait for them to bring it up themselves naturally in conversation.
2. Share with someone you trust – If you are struggling, consider speaking openly with someone, whether in person or by message, which can help you to process your emotions. For Shaun, he shared: “Once I did start opening up, that’s when everything got a bit lighter.” Elouise suggests, “Find community, find support, speak to other people who are going through similar struggles. How are they dealing with it? What are they doing to keep the romance alive or to get through this tricky time and enjoy life?”
3. Encourage without imposing your opinion. If someone shares something personal, listen fully before responding. Let them know you are there for them and ask how you can support them, rather than assuming what they need.
4. Create a Christmas/ festive routine that works for you. If traditional celebrations feel overwhelming, permit yourself to do things differently. You might skip the big dinner, start a new ritual like a quiet morning walk with coffee, or find other ways to mark the day that feel manageable.
Dont’s:
Don’t ask personal questions about pregnancy or family plans, especially in social settings
Don’t offer unsolicited advice like ‘just relax’ or ‘it’ll happen when it’s meant to’
Don’t probe with follow-up questions if someone opens up; listen supportively rather than asking questions that might cause unintentional distress
Don’t pressure someone to participate in every activity or ‘get into the spirit.’ Sometimes the kindest thing is simply allowing them to step away
(image: Pereanu Sebastian: Unsplash)
About JAAQ
JAAQ – which stands for Just Ask A Question is a pioneering mental health platform designed to make credible, compassionate support accessible to everyone – especially in the workplace. The platform provides engaging, clinically backed content by connecting users with experts and individuals with lived experience, who answer mental health questions anonymously. This unique, interactive approach empowers people to explore their mental wellbeing in a safe, stigma-free environment.
When people begin looking for psychological support, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, or CBT for short, is one of the most well-known and accessible forms of psychotherapy. Recently, more and more therapists are offering Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR), particularly for trauma.Both are well established, evidence-based treatments that can help people move forward from distressing experiences — but they do so in quite different ways.
If you’ve been wondering what sets them apart, or which might be the best fit for you, this post aims to break down the differences in a clear and down-to-earth way.
Understanding CBT
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is arguably the most widely accessed and researched psychological approaches, particularly in the UK. It’s based on the understanding that our thoughts, emotions, physical sensations, and behaviours are all connected. When one of these areas becomes unhelpful — for example, when our thoughts become overly negative or worrisome — it creates a negative cycle that keeps us stuck and in turn maintains that distress.
CBT helps a person to notice these patterns and challenge them with practical, realistic alternatives. The aim is not to “think positively” but to think more accurately. For instance, if you often find yourself thinking “I always mess things up,” CBT would explore the evidence for and against that thought, helping you see the situation in a more balanced light.
Sessions are focused on the present and typically structured towards achieving mutually agreed goals. There is less emphasis on the past and childhood, although this can be useful to consider in relation to the development of a person’s belief system or how they see the world today. This, in turn, influences a person’s responses to distress. CBT continues outside of sessions as clients engage in task such as trying alternative response to distress, or journalling at challenging times.
CBT for trauma focuses on making changes to the way a person thinks about a traumatic event, and themselves within that event. Re-living is a key element of CBT for trauma and enables the person to safely revisits the traumatic memory in a structured, supportive way with their therapist. This allows the brain to process the event as a memory, rather than something that is still happening now, which in turn reduces distress around the event and any associated flashbacks or nightmares. The overall aim is to reduce distress, restore a sense of safety and control, and help the person make sense of what happened so the trauma feels like something from the past — not something still happening in the present.
CBT is highly effective for anxiety, low mood/depression, panic attacks, phobias, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), PTSD/trauma, poor sleep/insomnia and many other mental health difficulties.
Understanding EMDR
Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR) might sound unusual at first — after all, what do eye movements have to do with mental health? Yet EMDR is a powerful, evidence-based therapy originally developed to help people recover from trauma.
The theory behind EMDR is that when something distressing happens, our brains sometimes struggle to process it properly. The memory can get “stuck,” remaining vivid and the person continues to experience the fear as if the event is happening again. EMDR helps the brain work through these memories so they can be stored more adaptively — as something that happened in the past, rather than something that continues to feel threatening now.
During EMDR sessions, the therapist will guide you through sets of bilateral stimulation — this could involve following their fingers with your eyes, hearing alternating tones through headphones, or feeling gentle taps on your hands. This process is thought to mimic the way the brain naturally processes memories during REM sleep.
One benefit of EMDR is that it’s not necessary to go into detail about the event if you don’t want to. The focus is on how it feels in your body and what comes up in the moment. Over time, people often report that distressing memories lose their emotional intensity, and the beliefs tied to those experiences begin to shift to something most positive and empowering, rather than fearful or critical.
Can CBT and EMDR Be Combined?
Absolutely. Many therapists are trained in both and will tailor the approach depending on your needs. For example, someone with trauma may start with CBT techniques to manage anxiety and develop coping skills, then move into EMDR once they feel more grounded and ready to process deeper memories. In some cases, EMDR can help resolve traumatic roots of long-standing patterns, while CBT provides the tools and strategies to maintain progress in day-to-day life.
It isn’t about one being “better” than the other — it’s about finding what works for you, at the right time and pace.
Which One Should You Choose?
If you’re feeling stuck in unhelpful thoughts or patterns — for example, overthinking, avoidance, or self-criticism — CBT can be a great place to start. It’s structured, practical, and gives you tools you can continue using long after therapy ends. If you’ve experienced trauma, flashbacks, or distressing memories that feel “frozen in time,” EMDR might be more suitable. It’s gentle yet powerful, and often helps people move on from experiences they’ve been carrying for years.
Ultimately, the best way to decide is to talk with a qualified therapist who can help assess your situation and guide you towards the most appropriate treatment.
Final Thoughts
Both CBT and EMDR offer genuine hope for change. Whether you’re learning to manage anxiety, heal from trauma, or simply understand yourself better, the right therapeutic relationship can make all the difference.
At its heart, therapy isn’t just about techniques — it’s about feeling safe, understood, and supported while you make sense of your experiences. Whether through CBT, EMDR, or a combination of both, the goal is the same: helping you feel more in control of your thoughts, emotions, and your life again.
This blog was written by UK therapist Andrew Kemp at www.clearmindcbt.comand contains sponsored links.
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