Category: relationships

Mental Health Experts Shine A Light On The Struggle Of Infertility Over The Festive Season by Experts at JAAQ

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Victoria Volkova Unsplash)

For many people, Christmas time/festive season is a time for happiness, family and bringing people together; however, one in seven UK couples face a hidden grief : infertility..

Research reveals that nearly three in four people battling infertility are burdened with feelings of failure, ​​adding to the hidden grief many already feel during the holidays. In response, mental health platform JAAQ wants to spread awareness around why infertility can be harder during the holidays and what we can do to approach the topic sensitively.

Male fertility coach explains why infertility feels heavier during the festive season 

Male fertility coach, Shaun Greenway, who was diagnosed with azoospermia, explains on JAAQ why the holiday season is so difficult: “We got a pregnancy announcement at Christmas, and it took me right back to that place. That hurt. That weird feeling of happiness mixed in with jealousy and anger and pain.”  Even after he had twins via donor sperm, the emotions didn’t disappear “It will always be part of me. It’s always there.”

Shaun’s experience highlights a truth many people face – that infertility doesn’t end with treatment or conception; it changes shape, often resurfacing during emotionally charged times like Christmas, a time filled with pregnancy announcements and marketing imagery filled with children and togetherness.

Founder and CEO of Fertility Help Hub, Eloise Edington, knows that pain well. Supporting her devastated husband while navigating her own grief, she recalls when speaking on JAAQ: “Supporting my devastated husband while also equally grieving myself and knowing that we would never have a biological child together meant we were both drowning in separate pain.”

She’s open about the reality of those moments: “Lots of crying, lots of eating chocolate, wine, being together. Not pretty. Not Pinterest-worthy. Just real.” For many couples facing infertility, this is the reality of Christmas – raw, difficult and far from the idealised celebrations we often imagine. 

(image: Priscilla Prisceez, Unsplash)

4 dos and don’ts for talking about infertility this holiday season

To make the festive season a little easier, mental health platform JAAQ has revealed four essential dos and don’ts for talking about infertility this Christmas – whether you’re facing it yourself, or want to approach the topic sensitively with others. 

Dos:

  • 1. Think before you ask sensitive questions about pregnancy or starting a family and wait for them to bring it up themselves naturally in conversation.
  • 2. Share with someone you trust – If you are struggling, consider speaking openly with someone, whether in person or by message, which can help you to process your emotions. For Shaun, he shared: “Once I did start opening up, that’s when everything got a bit lighter.” Elouise suggests, “Find community, find support, speak to other people who are going through similar struggles. How are they dealing with it? What are they doing to keep the romance alive or to get through this tricky time and enjoy life?”
  • 3. Encourage without imposing your opinion. If someone shares something personal, listen fully before responding. Let them know you are there for them and ask how you can support them, rather than assuming what they need. 
  • 4. Create a Christmas/ festive routine that works for you. If traditional celebrations feel overwhelming, permit yourself to do things differently. You might skip the big dinner, start a new ritual like a quiet morning walk with coffee, or find other ways to mark the day that feel manageable.  

Dont’s:

  • Don’t ask personal questions about pregnancy or family plans, especially in social settings
  • Don’t offer unsolicited advice like ‘just relax’ or ‘it’ll happen when it’s meant to’
  • Don’t probe with follow-up questions if someone opens up; listen supportively rather than asking questions that might cause unintentional distress
  • Don’t pressure someone to participate in every activity or ‘get into the spirit.’ Sometimes the kindest thing is simply allowing them to step away 

(image: Pereanu Sebastian: Unsplash)

About JAAQ

JAAQ – which stands for Just Ask A Question is a pioneering mental health platform designed to make credible, compassionate support accessible to everyone – especially in the workplace. The platform provides engaging, clinically backed content by connecting users with experts and individuals with lived experience, who answer mental health questions anonymously. This unique, interactive approach empowers people to explore their mental wellbeing in a safe, stigma-free environment.

Expert Advice On Bipolar And Staying Well During The Summer With Bipolar UK

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 3 Comments

(image: Angelo Pantazis, Unsplash)

More than one million people (including myself) are living with bipolar in the UK and, despite the summer meaning excitement and positivity for most, for many living with bipolar this is not always the case.

Common challenges in summer can impact people living with the condition- including high temperatures which can interfere with certain medications (including Lithium and anti psychotics or anti depressants), the longer daylight hours which can disrupt mood stability, and travelling which can sometimes trigger symptoms.

There are ways to manage seasonal challenges, and Bipolar UK is now sharing its top tips to help people navigate the summer months!

Top tips for navigating the next few summer months if you have bipolar from Bipolar UK:

  1. Sleep

Maintaining a regular sleep routine is an important way to support mood stability. Lighter nights can make it more difficult to switch off and wind down; and early sunrises can cause disruptions to sleep. Blackout curtains or an eye mask might help.

  1. Heat

Hot weather can affect both physical and mental wellbeing. Certain medications used to treat bipolar can make it harder for the body to regulate its own temperature, leading to overheating. Staying cool, drinking plenty of water and staying out of the sun during the hottest parts of the day can help reduce the risk of overheating and becoming dehydrated. Rest is important so communicate with friends and family about how you’re feeling and if you need to rearrange plans.

  1. Travel

Be mindful when travelling to different time zones. Jetlag can have an impact on bipolar symptoms. Try to make time to sleep and rest whilst on the plane and when you arrive so you can acclimatise. Set a reminder on your phone of when you need to take your medication so you can stick to your schedule. 

  1. Sensitivity

Some bipolar medications can increase sensitivity to sunlight so protecting your skin with a high factor suncream when outside is important, as well as seeking shade when possible. Continue to take your medication as prescribed but do speak to your medical professional if you have any concerns.

  1. Socialising

There are often more social activities during the summer, with people wanting to make the most of the better weather. If it all feels too much, learn to say “no” and preserve your energy. Pick and choose which activities you’d like to do, but don’t feel obliged to do them all.

  1. Routine

Longer days can lead to changes in routine which can trigger shifts in mood. Some people with bipolar feel their mood can shift more easily into hypomania and mania during the summer months, whereas others notice their mood dips into depression. Noticing the signs early and speaking to your mental health team, family or other support network can ensure you get help when you need it and potentially avoid a relapse.

(image: Link Hoang, Unsplash)

Bipolar UK offers support to anyone affected by bipolar with their free UK-wide services – peer support line, peer support groups and eCommunity – and resources, including their Could it be bipolar?  campaign and Mood Tracker app.

Create More Fulfilling Relationships By Following The Law Of Attraction by Dr Hannah Yang

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 2 Comments

(image: Priscilla Du Preez: Unsplash)

While there are many people perfectly happy with staying single, a good majority of people have the common desire to find that special someone with whom they can navigate life’s journey. Having a companion you trust who can help provide support, comfort, and love can be incredibly motivating and help many people get through the variety of obstacles that life throws their way.

However, finding and maintaining this type of positive connection can often be challenging. This is where the Law of Attraction can be helpful to understand. This provides valuable information about the dynamics of different types of relationships and helps individuals better understand why some connections in life tend to thrive while others fall short. 

By applying certain principles outlined in the Law of Attraction, it can be easier to create more fulfilling and mutually beneficial relationships in our lives.

How Does the Law of Attraction Apply in Relationships?

The Law of Attraction is a concept that suggests that the energy we put out into the world is the same kind of energy we attract back. Basically, the more positive of a person you are, the more likely you are to get better outcomes in all areas of life – including the relationships you’re a part of.

Our personality and mindset, including the things that drive us, our individual beliefs, and our emotional states, can all act like a magnet, drawing in people who resonate with those same qualities. This means the kind of relationships we want to have in life can also be influenced by the energy we project.

The Law of Attraction encourages us to have a more receptive attitude toward building healthy relationships. This is achieved by aligning our desires with our actions and the energy we express. When this is done, we become more open to new connections and opportunities for love and fulfillment in our lives, even if they may feel like a leap of faith.

Being Upfront About What You Need in a Relationship

Before you’re able to apply different principles of the Law of Attraction, you need to know what you really want in a romantic relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in superficial aspects like wanting to be with someone with good looks or who makes a decent income. However, it’s much more important to focus on the deeper qualities of your ideal partner first.

To help achieve this, there are some key aspects you should consider:

  • Their Shared Values – The person you’re with should complement your own shared values or core beliefs. You’ll want to think about any essential traits that matter most to you, such as honesty, patience, compassion, or a willingness to forgive. All of these values can form the foundation of a strong and lasting connection.
  • Your Emotional Needs – While financial security is important, your emotional security is what will really contribute to more happiness in a relationship. Consider what being emotionally safe means to you. Maybe this means you need a partner who is more expressive, reassuring, or a good listener. Whatever they are, understanding your emotional needs will help point you in the direction of someone who can fulfill them.
  • Finding Common Interests – A fulfilling relationship often involves being with someone who has shared interests or life experiences. Think about the activities you enjoy and the kind of lifestyle you picture for your future. Finding someone with compatible interests can lead to a more enjoyable life and a strong connection with your partner.

Aligning Your Energy With Your Partner

After you’ve thought carefully about what your ideal partner looks like (inside and out), it’s important to consider how you can start to build the same traits within yourself. This isn’t about trying to be something you’re not but rather recognising how the energy you put out can express what you’re looking for.

For example, if you want a partner who is compassionate and empathetic, consider how you can show more kindness to those around you and practice self-compassion. If you’re hoping for someone lighthearted and fun-loving, look for ways to bring more joy and laughter into your own life and the lives of others.

The Law of Attraction is about recognising the emotions you want and understanding that to attract the type of love you want in life, you first need to express it in different ways.

(image: Mandy Von Stahl: Unsplash)

Accepting and Giving Love

It can be difficult when you’re wanting to be with someone, but you just haven’t felt that spark yet. But instead of dwelling on feelings of loneliness, think about ways that you can express gratitude for the love already present in your life. Try not to take the bonds you have for granted with your supportive friends and loving family members. Nurturing these connections creates a positive ripple effect, which can radiate outwards and signal your openness to receiving even more love from others.

Affirmations are another way to help manifest more love in your life and the relationships you have. Telling yourself these short but powerful statements helps to reinforce your worthiness and attract the right person into your life. Repeating affirmations like “I am deserving of love” or “I will find my perfect match” can help give you a more profound sense of self-love and help you stay patient.

Be Willing to Take Action

While patience is a virtue when looking for a life partner, the Law of Attraction doesn’t mean you need to maintain a passive attitude. It actually encourages you to take more proactive steps when finding new sources of joy and fulfillment.

Don’t be afraid to embrace new opportunities to align your life and relationships with any of your aspirations. This could involve joining a social club, exploring different dating apps, or engage in activities that help you to broaden your social circles. Trust your instincts and be open to connecting with new individuals.

Start Building Stronger Relationships

By leveraging the power of the Law of Attraction, you can start to manifest more meaningful relationships in your life that help you to be a better person. Remember to prioritise your well-being while expressing your authentic self and the qualities you’re really looking for in a partner. These actions will help to signal to anyone around you that you are ready for and deserving of receiving more love.

About Dr Yang:

Visionary and healthcare entrepreneur by passion, Licensed Psychologist by training, Dr. Hannah Yang loves creating new possibilities in the world of mental health and wellness. Dr. Yang established Balanced Awakening in 2015 as a niche psychotherapy practice for women. As Balanced Awakening flourishes in Chicago, and soon Miami, she also loves to tap into her passion for design and Feng Shui to create fabulous environments for herself, her team, and clients.

What 6 Phases Does the Borderline Personality Disorder Relationship Cycle Consist Of? by Maya

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Kenny Eliason: Unsplash)

Those who have Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) often have trouble maintaining relationships. Though not every relationship will go through these stages and the process isn’t always linear, there are six distinct phases they can go through (although each person is different). Those phases can include the following.

Idealisation

The first phase, often the start of the relationship, is the idealisation phase. Someone with BPD will shower their partner with affection, so the relationship starts out passionately. They may develop feelings fast, and they may mistake the initial feelings of passion as finding the person they’re going to be with forever. Those getting help for their mental health at a Borderline personality treatment center will learn how to recognise this phase in their relationships.

Fear of Abandonment

Once the relationship is underway, the person with BPD will end up watching everything their partner does carefully. The fear of abandonment is strong, so they end up worrying that there are signs that they will be left behind. If their partner doesn’t answer a text message fast enough, the person with BPD might feel like their partner is thinking of leaving them. This can put strain on the relationship.

Reassurance

At this point, the person with BPD will attempt to get reassurance that the partner isn’t going to leave. They might start arguments in an attempt to get the partner to prove they are willing to fight to stay in the relationship. This is often where relationships turn toxic, as the behaviour leads to more arguments and fights in an effort to get the partner to prove they’re serious about the relationship.

Distress

Because of the toxicity in the relationship, it will start to fall apart. The person with BPD will see this coming and start to feel like there’s no way to save the relationship. They’re may feel like they are empty, but they do not have a way to communicate this with their partner. The lack of communication skills can spell disaster for the relationship.

Abandonment

The person with BPD is likely to be the first one to break up the relationship. At this point, it’s difficult if not impossible for the relationship to recover, even if the person with BPD realises what they’ve done. This ultimately creates the feeling of being abandoned, so they are likely going to feel like their fear is real and will be more likely to repeat these phases in the future.

Grief

The final stage is grief. They may end up blaming themselves for the relationship ending and can engage in self-harm or other destructive behaviours as a result. Some will turn to substance abuse or risky behaviours as they grieve the end of the relationship. Depending on the severity of BPD, the intensity of the relationship, and other factors, it may not take long to get from the idealisation stage to the grief stage, which can make going through this stage worse.

BPD disorder doesn’t mean that a relationship is impossible and not all relationships with them will go through these phases. However, this is a common way that relationships play out when one of the people suffers from BPD. Therapy and relationship counselling can help both people to recover and repair from any toxic relationship patterns.

This article was written by Maya.

Navigating Through The Storm: How to Process Your Spouse’s Adultery by Lizzie Weakley.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 2 Comments

(image: Kelly Sikkema, Unsplash)

Discovering that your spouse has committed adultery (extra marital sex) can be a devastating blow to any marriage. The betrayal, hurt, and confusion can be overwhelming, and it may feel like your world has been turned upside down. One of the most challenging aspects of dealing with infidelity is processing your spouse’s tone of voice. How do you navigate through the storm of emotions and make sense of their words? This blog post will explore some strategies to help you process your spouse’s adultery and move towards healing and understanding.

Take a Step Back
When you first discover that your spouse has been unfaithful, it’s natural to feel a wide range of emotions, including anger, sadness, and betrayal. In the midst of all these overwhelming feelings, it’s important to take a step back and give yourself some time to process everything. Avoid making impulsive decisions or engaging in heated arguments based on your spouse’s tone of voice. Take a deep breath, step away from the situation if needed, and allow yourself some space to calm down before addressing the issue with your spouse.

Seek Support
Dealing with the aftermath of adultery can be incredibly isolating and lonely. It’s crucial to seek support from trusted friends, family members, or a therapist who can provide you with a safe space to express your feelings and receive guidance. Talking to someone about your spouse’s actions and how it has affected you can help you gain perspective and clarity on the situation. Remember that you don’t have to go through this difficult time alone. You may also want to seek legal support from a divorce lawyer if you’re considering divorce. 

Practice Active Listening

When confronting your spouse about their adultery, it’s important to practice active listening. This means truly listening to what they have to say without interrupting or jumping to conclusions. Try to understand their perspective, emotions, and reasons behind their actions. By actively listening, you can create a more open and honest dialogue with your spouse, which is essential for healing and moving forward.

Set Boundaries
Processing your spouse’s adultery may require setting boundaries in your relationship. It’s important to establish clear boundaries that will help rebuild trust and ensure that both you and your spouse feel respected and heard. This may involve limiting communication, taking a break from the relationship, or seeking professional help to work through the issues together. Setting boundaries can help create a more secure and healthy environment for both partners to address the infidelity and its consequences.

Focus on Self-Care

Dealing with the aftermath of adultery can take a toll on your mental and emotional well-being. It’s crucial to prioritize self-care and focus on activities that bring you comfort and relaxation. Whether it’s taking a walk, practicing mindfulness, or engaging in a hobby you enjoy, make sure to take care of yourself during this challenging time. Remember that you deserve love, compassion, and kindness, especially when processing your spouse’s adultery.

Processing your spouse’s adultery can be an incredibly difficult and painful experience. It’s important to give yourself time to heal, seek support from loved ones, and practice healthy communication strategies to navigate through this challenging time. Remember that you are not alone in this journey, and there is hope for healing and rebuilding trust in your relationship.

By taking care of yourself, setting boundaries, and practicing active listening, you can move towards understanding and forgiveness, whether that leads to reconciliation or separation. Stay strong, be kind to yourself, and trust that you have the strength to overcome this obstacle in your marriage.

This article was written by Lizzie Weakley.

Simple and Practical Tips To Prioritise Your Mental Health During Divorce by Ani. O

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 1 Comment
(image: Ani, O)

Going through a divorce can be one of the most emotionally and mentally taxing experiences in life. The process itself is often filled with stress, uncertainty, and overwhelming emotions. Amidst all this turmoil, it’s easy to put your mental well-being on the back burner as you navigate legal proceedings and other practical aspects of the divorce. However, neglecting your mental health during such a challenging time can have long-lasting effects on your overall well-being.

That’s why we’ve compiled some simple yet effective tips to help you prioritise your mental health during a divorce. No matter where you are in your journey, these strategies can provide much-needed support and guidance for taking care of yourself while going through this difficult transition period.

The Importance of Prioritising Your Mental Health

Going through a divorce is undoubtedly one of the most stressful and emotionally draining experiences that one can go through. It is normal to feel overwhelmed, exhausted, and anxious during this period. However, at such a time, it is crucial to prioritise your mental health to make it through the ordeal. The effects of divorce can be long-lasting if left untreated, and it is, therefore, essential to seek support from friends, family, or professionals. Taking care of yourself emotionally, physically, and spiritually is the key to your overall well-being. Remember, divorce is not a sign of failure but an opportunity to learn, grow, and rebuild.

Surrounding Yourself With a Support System

Divorce can be a challenging and emotional process, and it’s important to have a support system in place to help you through it. This system may include friends, family members, or even a therapist who can provide you with emotional support, guidance, and a listening ear. Consider joining a support group where you can connect with others who are going through similar experiences. Surrounding yourself with a positive and supportive community can help you feel less isolated and more empowered as you navigate through this difficult time. Remember, it’s okay to lean on others for help during the divorce process.

Making Time for Self-Care Activities

It’s essential to prioritise self-care activities during this challenging time. Many individuals overlook taking care of themselves when they are undergoing a significant life change, such as a divorce. However, carving out time for self-care activities can help you cope with the stress and emotions that come along with a divorce. Self-care activities can include things such as taking a relaxing bath, reading your favourite book, getting a massage, or taking a walk outside. Remember that taking care of yourself is essential for your well-being, and it’s okay to make yourself a priority during this time.

Seeking Professional Help if Needed During the Divorce

It’s okay to admit that you may need professional help during this time. Seeking the assistance of a divorce mediator can be beneficial for both parties involved. Divorce mediation is a process where a neutral third party helps couples resolve issues surrounding their divorce, including property division, child custody, and spousal support. The mediator’s role is to facilitate communication between partners and help guide the conversation towards a mutually satisfying resolution. Not only can a mediator help you navigate the complexities of divorce, but they can also help minimise conflict and reduce the length of the legal process.

Setting Boundaries and Saying No to Extra Stressors

Divorce is already a stressful and overwhelming experience, so it’s essential to set boundaries and say no to any extra stressors that may come your way. This can include declining social events or appointments that don’t serve your mental or emotional health during this challenging time. It’s crucial to prioritize yourself and your well-being during a divorce. Setting boundaries not only helps keep stress levels low but also gives you the space you need to process your emotions. Saying no can be challenging, but it’s essential to remember that you don’t have to take on everything that comes your way.

In conclusion, divorce can be a challenging and emotionally draining experience for anyone. It’s important to prioritize your mental health during this time, and that means surrounding yourself with a support system, making time for self-care activities, and seeking professional help if needed. You deserve happiness and peace of mind, so don’t hesitate to reach out for assistance or take a step back when necessary. Incorporate these tips into your daily routine, and you will emerge from this experience stronger than ever before.

This article was written by Ani. O, freelance writer

7 Skills You Will Learn In Couples Therapy by Maya

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

(image: Kristina Litvjak, Unsplash)

Relationships are just as challenging as they are rewarding—and couples often encounter obstacles that put their bonds to the test. Relationship counselling or couples therapy offers a supportive space where couples can enhance and explore their connections. Beyond resolving pressing issues, couples therapy gives partners the skills to build lasting relationships. Read on to learn about the skills you’ll gain in relationship therapy.

Communication Between Partners

It’s one of the cornerstones of healthy relationships, yet many couples struggle with it. In couples therapy, patients focus on improving communication through emotional expression, active listening, and learning non-verbal cues. When you seek treatment with your significant other, you’ll learn to communicate while seeing things from the other person’s perspective.

Conflict Resolution

Disagreements are an inevitable part of relationships, but the importance is in how they are handled. Couples therapy gives significant others the skills to handle disputes without harming their relationships. Through various skill-building techniques, couples empower themselves to resolve conflicts more effectively.

Strengthening Empathy

Empathy, or a person’s ability to understand others’ feelings, is crucial to a strong emotional connection. In couples therapy, partners learn to sympathize with each other’s emotions and experiences. Developing these skills builds emotional intimacy and creates a more understanding environment.

Creating and Maintaining Healthy Personal Boundaries

Respecting and establishing boundaries is important when building and maintaining healthy relationships. Therapy helps couples communicate and define individual boundaries while ensuring that both people feel heard and respected. Building and maintaining healthy boundaries helps spouses preserve their autonomy and builds mutual respect.

Problem-Solving Together

Life is full of challenges, and spouses must work together to resolve them. Couples therapy gives partners better problem-solving skills, teaching them to cooperate when tackling problems. These skills are invaluable in handling life’s ups and downs while maintaining a healthy relationship.

Effective Emotional Regulation

Managing and understanding emotions is one of the keys to a solid relationship. Therapy helps couples regulate their emotions by identifying and expressing them in healthy ways. Learning to deal with emotions fosters intimacy and creates safe spaces in which vulnerabilities can be expressed.

Regaining Intimacy

Intimacy is more than a sense of physical closeness; it’s a spiritual, intellectual, and emotional connection. Couples therapy helps significant others find and rebuild every facet of intimacy. Whether it’s rekindling the flames of romance, finding common interests, or connecting in new ways, therapy helps couples regain their feelings of connection and closeness.

Why Go to Counseling When You Already Have a Healthy Relationship?

While age-old stereotypes maintain that couples therapy is only for those on the verge of relationship failure, every couple can enjoy the benefits. Participating in therapy isn’t an admission of weakness or failure—it’s a step toward a more resilient, healthy relationship. These skills, built under a therapist’s guidance, give couples the ability to communicate effectively, handle life’s challenges, and form more meaningful connections with one another. If you need help with a committed relationship, find a couples therapist in your area.

Couples Therapy: Building Skills for a Better Life

Whether you’re just starting out or trying to rebuild a faltering relationship, couples therapy may be helpful. In therapy, spouses will gain the skills and coping strategies needed to build stronger bonds while preserving their individuality. With the right kind of therapy, any couple can make their relationship stronger, longer lasting, and more resilient.

This article was written by freelance writer Maya.

Navigating Divorce Law While Caring for Your Mental Health by Brooke Chaplan

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 1 Comment

(image: Pexels)

Note: the author refers to USA divorce laws but the advice for mental health is the same.

Divorce is an extremely difficult process, emotionally and financially draining, and legally complex. Whether you are the one filing for divorce or the one who is served with divorce papers, this life-altering experience can take a toll on your mental health. With so many issues to consider – child custody, spousal support, property division, and more – navigating divorce law (USA) can be intimidating. But it’s important to prioritise your mental health during this challenging time. In this blog post, we will explore some ways to help you manage your mental health and navigate divorce law.

Focus on Self-Care

The first step to taking care of your mental health is to focus on self-care. Amidst all the chaos, don’t forget to take care of yourself. Eat healthily, exercise regularly, get enough sleep, and seek help immediately if you feel overwhelmed. Make sure to carve out time for activities that you enjoy and engage in self-care rituals that make you feel good.

Seek Therapy

Divorce is a tough time, and you don’t have to go through it alone. Don’t hesitate to seek out professional help from a licensed therapist. A therapist can help you work through the complex emotions you’re feeling and provide you with coping mechanisms to manage your emotions proactively.

Find Emotional Support

Surround yourself with positive and supportive friends and family who will uplift and cheer you up. Find a support network of divorce recovery groups where you can share your experiences and get emotional support from people who understand what you’re going through. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and delegate tasks to relieve stress.

Stay Educated on Divorce Law (USA)

Divorce laws vary from state to state, so it’s important to stay educated about the laws that apply in your state. An understanding of the legal process can help you make better decisions and manage your legal battles more effectively. Consult with a qualified divorce attorney who can provide you with legal guidance and support.

Mediation

Consider mediation as a way to avoid going to court. It’s an opportunity to resolve your differences collaboratively and avoid contentious legal battles that can take a toll on your mental health. Mediation focuses on negotiating a settlement that works for both parties, and an experienced mediator can help you resolve issues like child custody, spousal support, property division, and more.

Going through a divorce is challenging, and it’s okay to ask for help.

Remember to take care of your mental health during this time by focusing on self-care, seeking therapy, finding emotional support, staying educated on divorce law, and considering mediation. You are not alone, and with the right support and guidance, you can successfully navigate the divorce process. Take care of yourself, and don’t hesitate to reach out to professionals if you need help.

This article was written by Brooke Chaplan, who is based in the USA. For UK and other divorce laws, please see your own country.

Family Responsibilities And Mental Health: Navigating the Unique Relationship.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ Leave a comment

Pexels Image – CC0 Licence

Being part of a family is one of the most natural things in life. However, sometimes that family isn’t so great for your mental health! It’s an unfortunate truth, but it affects so many people around the globe, even if we don’t talk about it. 

The silence involved can make you feel like such an outsider. Sometimes, your family who are supposed to love and cherish you , aren’t quite doing their job, and it’s hard to explain that. So what can you do in a scenario like this?

Build an External Support System

If your family isn’t there for you, you’ll need to build yourself a support system outside of them. Plenty of friends with couches you can crash on, or provide a shoulder to cry on if your parents have made another cruel remark. 

For any person out there, having connections outside of blood relations is a good idea. It widens your life in general, providing more viewpoints and experience for you to count on. And knowing there’s a group of friendly, funny, caring people at the end of the phone can make family responsibilities a lot easier to parse in your mind. 

Know Your Own Boundaries

Whether you’ve got a grown sibling you’re being made to feel responsible for or your parents have always reacted negatively to your decisions, your life is your own. As such, you may need to start putting up some walls. Commonly known as ‘going no contact’, you grant yourself the ability to move on from a childhood’s worth of trauma and finally make your own way in the world your way. 

But if no contact isn’t for you, you can try ‘low contact’ instead. Some people can panic at the thought of cutting ties completely, and there may still be people in your family you want to see on a regular basis (with boundaries).

No One Can Do it All

Even when you feel like you have to, or like you’re letting a loved one down – you didn’t. Remember, you’re only one person with 24 hours in a day, and you can’t be dedicating all that time to caring for someone else. As a parent or as an adult carer, you’re going to need help. 

So let people in when they’re available. Whether it’s counting on the support of a place like Prestwick Care when dealing with an elderly relative, or simply asking a sibling to pitch in when you can’t arrange a babysitter, help is there. You just have to reach out, no matter how much courage that might take.

A temporary worry is much better for you than long term stress when it comes to your mental health and wellness. 

Being stressed out by family responsibilities happens to us all. But if they’re chronic, reach out. You don’t have to take it all on alone. 

This article was written by a freelance writer.

8 Common Signs Of A Toxic Person or Narcissist.

~ Eleanor Segall ~ 2 Comments

(image: Unsplash: Kelly Sikkema)

Self-awareness is one of the most important things we can have as individuals. How we view ourselves, our relationships with others, and our environment are all critical aspects of how we interact with the world. However, it’s not always easy to recognise which people in our lives might not be so friendly. People who display certain qualities may seem nice on the surface, but underneath can be unkind, self-centered, or even toxic.

They can also be so because they possess certain traits that might make them difficult to get along with. Whether you’re an extrovert or an introvert, a team player, or a loner, you’ll probably encounter someone who doesn’t mesh well with others from time to time. You may wonder, “How does a narcissist react when they can’t control you?” While it’s challenging to pick up on a narcissist or a toxic person immediately, here are some ways to help you identify the warning signs of a toxic person so that you can steer clear of them in the future.

Too Assertive

While assertiveness isn’t wrong, too much can cause issues. Assertive people are not afraid to take control of their lives and their surroundings. Instead, they want the power to make decisions and express themselves. They don’t like being treated as though they’re weak or insignificant or any other sort of negative adjective.

They want to feel like the most important person in the room and that people listen to them when they speak. While assertiveness is a positive trait, it can shift into a negative one if expressed too aggressively or excessively. While this is a toxic trait, it doesn’t mean someone is inherently toxic just by having this trait alone.

Too Much Negativity

It can be hard to just unwind if you’re around someone that’s too negative. Everyone has had experience with negative people online, but having to have a relationship with someone negative can raise some alarm bells. When you do share your opinion, many people disagree with you and make your life difficult by leaving nasty comments.

It’s not good to deal with when someone constantly belittles or puts down others around them. This can be done by saying negative things about people behind their backs, making fun of them, or even physically hurting them. If you don’t want to deal with this negativity all day, it may be time for you to stop sharing your opinions.

Lack of Boundaries

One of the most obvious signs of a toxic person is when they start talking about political topics knowing that it’s not appropriate. This may be a sign that they’re looking for validation. If you’re not interested in what they have to say, it’s best to change the subject or walk away from the conversation. They might also feel threatened by you being open-minded and not having opinions on everything they believe in. Toxic people are often judgmental and don’t care about your feelings. They will attack your beliefs without realising how their words can hurt you.

Too Entitled

People often associate arrogance with toxic people, but many arrogant people feel entitled. They feel they are owed more than they’ve given, and they can be demanding regarding things like dates, friendships, or relationships. This trait is related to low self-esteem as the person who is arrogant and entitled might also struggle with their sense of self-worth.

Toxic people who are entitled might also be difficult for someone who wants a lot out of life or has yet to find their place in society. In these cases, the narcissist could become frustrated and lash out at those around them because they can’t understand why the other person isn’t either completely submissive or completely indulgent towards them in all circumstances.

Too Defensive

Everyone has their reasons for wanting to be defensive; this is completely normal and even acceptable. However, this can be a toxic trait if it occurs too much. Sometimes, light banter can be fun, and someone shouldn’t be defensive then. But even if someone is giving their opinion and someone else becomes defensive, then this could lean towards toxic behaviour. However, this can vary based on the situation.

Lack of Respect

Toxic people tend to consider your needs and expectations an offense or challenge to their self-esteem. They will lash out in anger or manipulate you into believing you’re responsible for them feeling bad. In reality, they cannot provide the respect and attention you need. This can cause frustration and resentment on your part. On the other hand, people willing to listen and respond appropriately will be more willing to meet your needs without criticising or judging them in return.

Constant Behavioral Changes

One of the most common traits is when someone’s behaviour is erratic, unpredictable, and often always changing. They might be jealous, demeaning, or unreliable. Someone who’s toxic will act a certain way towards you one day and completely change their behaviour the next day.

High Ego

A high ego is usually matched up with a narcissist, but keep in mind that not all toxic people or toxic traits are going to equate to this immediately. However, having too high of ego can indeed be a negative thing. They have an inflated sense of who they are as well as what they can do for you. They might also try to constantly tell you how to live your life and interfere with your decisions. They may always look out for themselves before anyone else in regard to everything from work to relationships.

Toxic people can be hard to spot. They can be easy to find in a friend, colleague, or even a romantic partner. However, if you’re unsure hopefully this article will help you spot a narcissist or toxic individual.

This article was written by a freelance writer.